To think my plan is flawed...

[inmyshoos]

Exh (bastardo) has moved 200 miles away with new woman. My 2 dd have contact monthly. Dd1 doesnt travel well. Had fab plan last night , bought family and friends railcard using tesco vouchers. Thought i could deliver them down for the holiday contact using it. But this morning ive realised on the return leg i will have no kids with me....
Does anyone know how strict they are about this. Seems so unfair! I am hugely skint so was only able to consider this because the card made it affordable

Why isn’t he coming for them?

Uh..you are travelling 200 miles to take your kids to the parent that voluntarily moved? And paying for it?

I am currently sitting on a train having delivered the DCs to their grandparents for a week. I will travel again next week to pick them up. For the return journey with the DCs I used a railcard. For this journey I am currently on and my journey to pick them up next week, I have bought a separate adult return (no railcard).

If your tickets are checked on the train they would probably charge you for another ticket. If you only use your tickets in an electronic barrier or if there are no inspectors on the train then you might get away with it. Depends whether you want to risk it or not. It could end up costing you more of there’s someone checking tickets on the train.

Yeh you make half the effort, if you are able to.

You need to have kids with you to travel on it. Not worth the full price ticket you'll be charged for.

But in this scenario you don't need to travel at all, he can collect them. And incur the costs of that 200 mile journey

Let him make the journey.

He wont make the journey any more than he does (once a month) If I want him to have his dc for part of school holidays then i have no choice but to deliver them or it wont happen. It is the only way to get some help with childcare whilst i work.

Seems so unfair re the rail card

Well it’s not really unfair about the railcard, it is marketed as a family railcard so it’s not surprising you can’t travel alone.

If you travel without dc on that railcard, if they check tickets (it’s peak season, so almost guaranteed they will) you will either have to buy a full price ticket or be fined.

Honestly if he won’t make the journey he doesn’t want his dc anyway, so why send them? They aren’t wanted by him. The maximum you should be doing is half way.....

Its your situation that's unfair, not the railcard. The railcard is doing exactly what it says on the tin and the main point of it is you travel with a dc. You likely will get checked, mine never used to but they must be tightening up as it has been every time on the last few rail journeys.

pinkheart because despite his lazy effortless attitude to his dc i think the best thing for my dc is to have a relationship with both parents until they are old enough to decide whether they want to remain in contact or not (when they see him in his true light for themselves without my clouding their judgement)

Yep, had this issue with DD once she turned 5 and trains got prohibitively expensive. Luckily she travels ok so I got a coach card, but I understand what a pain these logistics are. Like a pp has said though, it's the situation not the rail card that is unfair. Mega props to you for being so grown up about the contact with ex. It's really not easy