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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be blindsided by doctor's comments about my alcohol consumption?

385 replies

omafiet · 13/08/2019 15:13

I am 42 and overweight. Since having my third child and injuring my back I've gained 2.5 stone. The weight gain hasn't been linear - in fact this time last year I was in reasonable shape and doing a triathlon - but I know I need to do something. Now.

I have been having some unusual stomach symptoms recently and after my friend was diagnosed with ovarian cancer I figured to be on the safe side I should get checked out. I have a great reply with my doctor and respect her advice.

After doing the physical exam she asked me about my drinking habits. I replied that I drank half a bottle of wine, two or three times a week. So, up to 1.5 bottles a week. She put her pen down and told me that this was really excessive and I needed to cut down, if not stop completely for a while.

I'm a little freaked out and have decided to do a 90-day booze-free challenge. But is 1.5 bottles a week really so bad? When I was in my twenties I'd drink that in a night Blush. How much do you drink?

OP posts:
ishouldbedoingsomework · 13/08/2019 17:18

So I'm assuming that all of the posters on here who think it's far too much know better than the Chief Medical Officer?
The recommended limit is 14 units and unless you're drinking really strong wine, I can't really see how you're exceeding that unless possibly by less than one unit.
I think your doctor either misheard or is batty tbh.

EarringsandLipstick · 13/08/2019 17:20

@ishouldbedoingsomework

recommended limit is the key term. As in, don't drink more than this, not that it's a target that should be achieved.

Also - OP is overweight and would like to address this, had some other health concerns too - so taking a break from alcohol would probably be helpful.

comfysocks8516 · 13/08/2019 17:21

Maybe the doctor just meant in order to aid weight loss rather than insinuating that you drink too much? I drink around a bottle a week, and if I have a week where I don’t drink then I tend to lose a bit of weight. It’s not a huge amount in terms of alcohol, but it is in terms of calories if you see what I mean?

dottiedodah · 13/08/2019 17:24

I dont think it is an excessive amount ,but as you say you were asking advice from your doctor regarding weight gain and stomach pain,so perhaps she felt that it seemed a lot in your circumstances.Many soft drinks Elderflower, fruit cordial .Old fashioned lemonade ,are all refreshing in the Summer months .Why not have a little detox for a month or two ,and gradually introduce a couple of nights drinking one or two smallish glasses (Some wine glasses are HUGE!).

ishouldbedoingsomework · 13/08/2019 17:24

earnings- yeah, I get that.
I'm not necessarily saying you should drink that, but the guidelines do state that it's OK if you do drink at that level.
Therefore, I don't really see the issue unless you are saying that the guidelines are wrong?

SomewhereInbetween1 · 13/08/2019 17:24

Sorry, but drinking that amount that frequently IS excessive. Other posters who do the same can try to put you at ease and normalise it all they like, but that is a lot of alcohol over the course of just one week.

legolimb · 13/08/2019 17:25

I don' t think it is excessive.

I'm currently on the wagon as am on a diet - and the calories are just too high also as I get older the hangovers last all week

But generally me and could sit and share a bottle a wine at least two/three times per week. I think it's a perfectly acceptable amount to drink. It's hardly chugging down shots and partying until dawn everyday?

KateUrrer · 13/08/2019 17:25

It is tricky as normally I would have to have a good reason to fib.

So to get the correct information to a health care professional, who we are told routinely disbelieve their patients, I would have to remember to under state my true units.

Life is complicated.

TooManyPaws · 13/08/2019 17:25

It also depends on other things such as any medication you may be on. I have had to restrict myself to about one drink a day on weekends and often go without any alcohol for weeks, purely because it reacts with medication which is a pain in the arse. Are you on any sort of medication that means that may have some sort of interaction so that a normal intake becomes excessive?

BlueJava · 13/08/2019 17:27

Yes I think 1.5 bottles a week is a lot, personally I drink 1 glass if that. As you say doing 90 days alcohol free would be good.

Blue7 · 13/08/2019 17:27

It's not a lot.

As for empty calories, give me a glass of wine over a Mars bar bar any day..

Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 17:28

I probably drink the same OP, I choose a 9% strength though. 15 units is the limit .
I don't drink Mon to Thurs then share a bottle of wine DH on a Friday night and Saturday. Might drink a beer or 1 glass on a Sunday. Thought I was doing ok too!!

Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 17:30

Suzie I do dry Jan every year and never lose a pound!

IncrediblySadToo · 13/08/2019 17:32

Bloody hell there’s a lot of hysterical nonsense on this thread

1.5 bottles a week is not excessive

I can go weeks without even thinking about it, then I’ll fancy a rum & coke or a glass of wine, so I have one, maybe 2 sometimes more. If I was bothered to count the units there would be quite a few on tum nights as I’m not stingy with the rum!

It makes not one but if difference to my weight nor the ‘way I feel’ nor did it when
I was drinking Baileys regularly.

OP you seem sure she understood you meant 1.5 bottles pw, so I can only assume she’s got an issue with alcohol in general.

It’s human nature to want what we can’t have though, (see the Bic Pen experiment!!) so don’t be surprised if you find yourself wanting it more than you think you will - it doesn’t make you an alcoholic, just human!

Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 17:32

So many that barely drink. What do you drink on a Friday night? Ever fancy a nice couple of glasses of red with a roast dinner or an Italian meal? My problem is I don't enjoy soft drinks as they are too sweet. I love a G&T on a Friday night-look forward to it!

MotherofDinosaurs · 13/08/2019 17:35

I'm always amazed by how puritanical Mumsnet is when it comes to booze... 1.5 bottles per week is only one unit above the recommended dose... I like to save all mine for the weekend and binge drink them. Crack on OP.

QualCheckBot · 13/08/2019 17:35

Benjispruce So many that barely drink. What do you drink on a Friday night? Ever fancy a nice couple of glasses of red with a roast dinner or an Italian meal? My problem is I don't enjoy soft drinks as they are too sweet. I love a G&T on a Friday night-look forward to it!

I don't like the taste of alcohol so I wouldn't have an urge to drink on a Friday night. I don't need alcohol to relax or to have fun, its not something I ever think about. My guilty pleasure is chocolate.

jennymanara · 13/08/2019 17:36

After reading that GPs think you lie about how much alcohol you drink and double it, I now half the amount I drink and tell them that is what I drink. I used to be truthful.
You are fine OP.

DDIJ · 13/08/2019 17:39

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 17:40

St Charlotte I love you! Grin

bigKiteFlying · 13/08/2019 17:41

I've been told by medics we know that that they generally assume you are under estimating and so they double amount you give.

I've certainly been questioned when I tick light/occasional drinking box and there's surprised I mean that - and I have been told at some GP practises that I'm a non -drinker as many months I don't drink at all - it's usual to be a month with no alcohol than one with.

Could you have met one who does that - assumes they are being given a low figure and adds a bit on?

Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 17:42

Fair enough qual , chocolate isn't my thing.

thenightsky · 13/08/2019 17:42

They once recorded that they'd given me stop-smoking counselling. I've never smoked a single ciggy, ever. Confused

Fluffythrows · 13/08/2019 17:42

So many that barely drink. What do you drink on a Friday night? Ever fancy a nice couple of glasses of red with a roast dinner or an Italian meal? My problem is I don't enjoy soft drinks as they are too sweet. I love a G&T on a Friday night-look forward to it!

I can't say I ever fancy an alcoholic drink, it just doesn't appeal to me. I use wine for cooking but that's it. I have a nice meal on a Friday night.

I don't really drink many soft drinks either, I drink water or squash. If I'm out for a meal I might have a fizzy drink or sparkling water.

This seems to be a great source of ridicule for many people, I'm never really sure why.

EarringsandLipstick · 13/08/2019 17:43

ishouldbedoingsomework

earnings- yeah, I get that
I'm not necessarily saying you should drink that, but the guidelines do state that it's OK if you do drink at that level.
Therefore, I don't really see the issue unless you are saying that the guidelines are wrong?

But you've missed out on the rest of my post!

It's the context - they are the limits, OP is at the upper limit or maybe beyond, and she is overweight and has some other health (stomach) concerns.

So drinking that amounts is probably not a great idea!

And on the Irish version of the guidelines, basically the same as the UK of course (though limit is 11 standard units, so a little less), it prefaces it by saying there is no absolute 'safe' or 'recommended' level of alcohol to drink but they call the limits 'low-risk guidelines' instead.

It all depends on the individual.

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