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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask for a doctor home visit

46 replies

nuggiepop · 12/08/2019 19:43

My DS is 17 and has Asperger's and Agoraphobia and he has not left the house since late 2014 so since he was around 12.5. He gets extreme anxiety around people and panic attacks.

Lately, he's been worrying about being diabetic. He is at a healthy weight and has been trying his best to eat healthily as he used to consume quite a lot of chocolate and biscuits. Because of being housebound he didn't get enough exercise in so we bought him a second-hand treadmill a couple of months ago and he's been using it daily for about 2-3 weeks now. But he still can't stop worrying about being diabetic He worries A LOT about his health.

He believes he may be diabetic or pre-diabetic because his toilet visits are frequent (I don't think so myself) and his grown half-sister is Type 1 diabetic he checks his blood sugar using her machine supplied by her own doctor and although his blood sugar is in the normal range (not diabetic) it isn't that far off pre-diabetes. He's convinced he has pre-diabetes or he's already diabetic and it's stressing him out daily. He's very paranoid about his health and quite honestly he's a hypochondriac.

We've had the doctor out for him before (around late 2017 because of a reason I can't remember) but now he wants his doctor to come to our home again to take his blood sample to test if he has diabetes officially.

Should I ring up and see if they're able to come out and do that or would it be bothersome to them... DS is a sweet soul but he worries so much and I'm convinced this is the only way he'll be able to be at ease.

OP posts:

Schuyler · 12/08/2019 20:30

Your poor son. I feel for him. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to request a home visit but I think it needs to address his mental health. Sounds very difficult for you all.

Verykeentosellhelpme · 12/08/2019 20:33

I can categorically tell you he doesn't have type 1 diabetes. He would become very ill very quickly.

Atlasta · 12/08/2019 20:36

A doctor's home visit isn't going to help.
Negative results will give a temporary relief and reassurance. But as a health anxiety sufferer I can honestly say once this check comes back normal the focus is likely to switch to another 'problem' and so the cycle begins...and worsens.Either this or your ds starts questioning the reliability of the test and starts asking for second opinions and more visits...
I'd phone the doctor and explain everything about DS and referral times etc for CBT.
Physical symptoms of anxiety are very real and very scary and it's easy and natural to believe you are physically unwell with a medical problem when really its your thoughts causing the symptoms not your body.

Atlasta · 12/08/2019 20:37

In your body

Onceuponacheesecake · 12/08/2019 20:38

Yes it would be a waste of the GPS based on his symptoms. They would not carry out a blood test anyway. Requesting a phone appointment for his mental health issues would not be unreasonable

It's sounds like he needs treatment for his anxiety ASAP. How is he getting his hands on so much chocolate and biscuits that he think he's put himself at risk of diabetes at 14???

Starmer · 12/08/2019 20:47

I’m a GP and I’ve visited people in similar circumstances before, but more to address the mental health side of things. I know that some, but not all, of my colleagues would do too.

Would your son be able to speak to someone over the phone about things? If not, I would suggest getting his written consent for you to speak to one of the GPs (there’ll be someone with a special interest in mental health, so ask reception who it is) and explain the situation, and go from there.

And GPs can do bloods, even if we don’t do them much! But I agree with posters above who say that a normal blood result isn’t going to help much, as the anxiety will doubtless shift to some other diagnosis.

pottedshrimps · 12/08/2019 20:49

How has he fallen off the radar to the extent he hasn't been out for all this time? What about dental and optical checks, let alone the lack of fresh air and vitamin D, which he will need to be supplemented with btw or you're risking significant health problems, including MS.

His mental health needs should have been addressed a long time ago. Who diagnosed him with aspergers? I really hope this isn't true.

CloserIAm2Fine · 12/08/2019 20:55

I don’t think a home visit to test for a condition that you know he doesn’t have is reasonable. As PP have said, it won’t help in the long run because he’ll doubt the test or find another condition to fixate on.

But he definitely needs help for his anxiety so YWNBU to request a home visit to try and get help with that side of things.

timshelthechoice · 12/08/2019 21:01

It's super hard to get a GP home visit. I agree with the other suggestions.

bouncingraindrops · 12/08/2019 21:11

It sounds like you are enabling him massively here. He doesn't need a diabetes test and you trying to find out if he can have one to put his mind at ready isn't helpful, not in the long run anyway. Is he getting help?

CherryPavlova · 12/08/2019 21:20

I’m sure a GP would visit to assess his mental health and the family situation. Being housebound since 12 years of age should have rung huge safeguarding alarm bells and there should have been plenty of input from other agencies.
Sounds like he needs psychiatric and social care support to allow him to renter the adult world. I’d have to agree that blood testing for anxiety probably isn’t the answer.
What’s happening about his education?

ShhhBeQuiet · 12/08/2019 21:25

As suggested by a PP can you pay for a private doctor to visit. They would be able to look at the his general health as well.

Surfingtheweb · 12/08/2019 21:27

Could you try and use this as an good start for him leaving the house? Say doctor won't visit so he needs to go to the doctor?

PlasticBaby · 12/08/2019 22:00

I'm a (very happily) ex GP.

For there to have been no involvement before is complete bollocks. School refusal so young would have multiple markers.

So. What do you want from this?

stucknoue · 12/08/2019 22:09

What he needs is mental health support. My dd has asd and crippling anxiety and I've had to force her to leave the house sometimes but it's for her own good. I demanded help for her when her agoraphobia was at its worst

bristolianpielover · 12/08/2019 22:26

Who else is involved in his care, OP?

MyElbowIsItchy · 12/08/2019 23:48

Your child has been housebound for almost 5 years. Regardless if he is diabetic or not , there is absolutely no harm in getting a go to visit, even to assess him for a referral to cahms etc. This is not a waste of resources, this is a person dealing with mental health issues.

BoomBoomsCousin · 12/08/2019 23:58

Surely you wouldn't really be requesting the visit to deal with the possibility of diabetes but to help him address his health anxiety and agoraphobia? If he's been housebound since he was 12.5, doesn't he have some kind of mental health support already who might be more appropriate?

If not, I think a doctors appointment to discuss his mental health and get him support for that is entirely appropriate.

WindowsSmindows · 13/08/2019 00:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CherryPavlova · 13/08/2019 08:06

WindowsSmindows Perhaps, certainly it isn’t UK if there’s been no involvement of other agencies and few other countries have GPs as we understand them.

MrsBosh · 13/08/2019 08:24

I'm really disappointed OP hasn't come back. Lots of helpful advice.

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