There’s a huge age gap as I was unplanned. I was resented from birth by my siblings who were then young adults as they felt I had more material stuff than them and my parents had worked their way up the career ladder by the time I came along. My siblings did not bond with me at all as they were away from home most of the time at university, travelling or working in other countries. When they came home they’d openly criticise me and refer to me as a spoilt brat. I really wasn’t, I was actually being emotionally and physically abused and neglected although the toys and pretty dresses hid all of that. I was living with two alcoholics and began looking after the adults in the family for the first time when I was only 18 months old. I was the “adult” from a young age and knew about and witnessed things I shouldn’t have. My siblings were young, carefree adults living their own lives away from all the problems at home.
As I became a young adult myself I was still relegated to the kids table at family events and never included in the adult conversation. I was told to go and mind the kids (their children) and never taken seriously.
I cared for my grandparents and now care for my parents whilst my siblings have done nothing at all to help except stop by once or twice a year. I’m expected to wait on everyone (siblings and their children) hand and foot when they come, usually during my holidays from work, which coincide with school holidays (free childcare!).
I’m now 35 and have most likely missed out on a chance to have a relationship and children of my own because i’ve spent my life taking care of everyone else.
Still the narrative is that I’m the much adored and spoilt brat youngest child. My siblings don’t know me at all. They never tried.
If I sound resentful it’s because I am. But as usual I’ll plaster on a smile, be polite and kind and never speak up because any slight negative thing I do would be proof of me being an unlikable spoiled brat.
I would never have allowed a child of mine to be treated that way.