To be an emotional wreck about moving.

[PrettyTricky]

Moving in a couple of weeks, from one side of the country to the other, DP and teenager in tow. They are fine, in fact I'm amazed at my teenager's ability to be reasonably on board with the change after some initial resistance.

It's me who's a bloody wreck. Leaving a house I love, leavening my elderly parents, friends, and also my job. All of it.
I feel very unsettled and anxious about it all. Swinging from enthusiasm for a new start to absolute terror about the same.

Had a major wobble this afternoon whilst packing as I really like my life here, but the move is necessary for DP's work and we are planning to marry soon so want to make the move together and not do long distance.

Please tell me these are normal wobbles and it will all be ok?! Have been in my current house a long time and am a pretty sentimental old sap and don't do change very easily, so am struggling. I also fear I'm making everyone else's life a misery by bemoaning my worries and being generally negative.

Tell me it will all be fine!

Anyone?

I can’t help you, I’m also an emotional wreck about moving and we’re not even going far!

Our situations are totally different, but we’re moving soon too and it’s keeping me awake at night. I can hardly put my finger on why, but I’m riddled with anxiety about the whole thing.

I’m am organised person, everything will be sorted, we have a perfectly fine budget, but the many lines of sorting out and financial outlay etc etc is feeling chaotic and like my mind can’t focus on any particular thing.

So not the same, but I can totally imagine if I had all of that but was also moving areas and leaving loved ones, I’d be all over the shop.

I get you OP.

Thanks, all the best to you and your move too, I totally get how you feel.

I keep thinking that my whole life is being uprooted and it's making me feel wretched, but feigning positivity and enthusiasm to an extent so as not to completely get everyone else down.

There are times when I do feel excited about it too, ans I want desperately to be happy about it, but then the thought of leaving creeps back in. And it's not just my house, it's my work which I love, my family and also getting my teenager settled into a new school in a whole new part of the country. Aargh.

I'm even having physical anxiety symptoms - that lump in throat feeling, dry mouth, racing heartbeats. Awful.

Just keeping on putting one foot in front of the other and getting through my lists, but can't shake this fear.

Totally understand OP. We move from Norfolk to Scotland on Friday, just me, DH, teenage DD and DDog. I’m so anxious, I’ve not slept for weeks, yet it’s something we have all wanted to do for many years.

Change is hard at the best of times, but moving life as you know it from one location to another so far away involves everything ending and having to begin again elsewhere. For me, it’s the amount of unknowns that scare me.

I’m getting through each day by planning, packing and keep busy so I don’t overthink everything. It’s the night time that affects me most!

Best of luck with everything

Good luck @Armbow45, I hope all goes well. I've got a fortnight to go until moving too.

You're right, it's the fear of the unknown and the leaving of an entire life and everything familiar. Have lived in the same city my whole life, and now in my forties it seems a big ask to up sticks and start again somewhere new.

Don't get me wrong, there's something that is appealing about a fresh start in a way, but I need to get past my terror of change and get out of my comfort zone a bit. I wouldn't have chosen this move if it wasn't necessary for DP's work, so I think that makes it harder as I'm a reluctant mover.

Best of luck to you too. I hope everything works out for you and you settle into your new life. I’ve just dropped teenage DD to her farewell gathering and sobbed all the way home!

Couldn't your partner get a similar job locally? I'd be reluctant to leave elderly parents for one thing.

I’ve moved around the country for DH’s job, often to not the most appealing places and having to start climbing my own career path again.

I’d always look on it as an adventure, new places to explore, new people to meet. Family and friends can come and visit and you visit them.
Britain is not such a big place, so you can easily be in touch with elderly parents in an emergency.
Go live your life and enjoy.

Absolutely normal. Picture a kitty cat swinging off a branch and hang on in there.

And the actual process of packing up and moving is enough to drive a body to strong drink, even if you are 100% committed.

There's a reason they say moving is one of the most stressful experiences. I also wouldn't panic if you feel dreadful when you arrive. It'll pass and you'll be fine. Good luck

Totally understand OP I'm moving cross country to a new house and a new job just me and the cat.
I can't afford to keep my lovely home after divorce.
I cannot stop crying as I'm leaving my 5 old cats buried in the garden. They were my babies and leaving them is terrible.
All my memories of the last 20 years left behind, the sea and the land I love so much.
Trying to be positive but it's so hard.

To be honest OP I think it’s perfectly understandable that you’re anxious in that situation. It’s a massive ask. And I speak as someone who has lived in 4 different countries and 11 counties! Can’t your DP look for a similar role locally?

I was in your shoes several years ago. I still get homesick but you have to go where the work is.....

@madcatladyforever sorry to hear you're having to leave behind a place that's meant a lot to you. Perhaps a move might help close a chapter after divorce and open up new possibilities. I know it will be hard to see that at the moment. Good luck with your move.

Thanks for all your comments. Unfortunately DP's work demands we move - he earns a lot more than I do. I'm going to have to start afresh. I spent the last few years building up a business here that's dependent on local clientele, so saying goodbye to my income and all my hard earned clients has been really tough. I guess progress doesn't come without sacrifice and this has felt like a huge one.