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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think they will come back?

69 replies

Scaredmama1 · 09/08/2019 18:57

Name changed for this as outing.
Early hours of this morning our house was broken into. We were asleep upstairs with our baby aged 2 months and toddler dd. Nothing was taken but all of our drawers had been turned out downstairs looking for, we presume, car keys. We had taken our keys to bed with us. Was up numerous times with baby so not sure if I may have disturbed them.
We live in a property approx 15yrs old. Doors were fairly old, no alarm. Police think it looks professional gang-type crime stealing vehicles to order as dh has expensive unusual car. We had planned to replace doors and install alarm etc but with moving in recently and having baby we just hadn't got around to it. We've managed to have alarm installed today and have now padlocked gates and driveway. We've also had the door fixed of course and have started to ball rolling with new doors and cctv.
Aibu to think that the burglars will come back because they didn't get what they came for? Perhaps with violence or multiple people? I'm petrified and don't know what we can do to ever get past this.
Thanks

OP posts:
44PumpLane · 09/08/2019 20:02

Motion activated flood light that comes on when someone approaches your drive in the vicinity of the car couples with good cctv pointed at the drive in the area of the car.
Notice on the gate that the property is covered by cctv.

But then I would also leave the keys somewhere obvious downstairs--if they make it as far as being in your home you want them gone as soon as possible.

Hecateh · 09/08/2019 20:02

The advice about leaving the keys visible.

I heard the best advice was to leave them on the stairs, certainly not visible from outside. So not easy to grab just inside the door but so they can't be missed if they are desperate enough to come upstairs

FairyDust92 · 09/08/2019 20:08

That's really shitty and I too would be petrified. I don't want to scare you but I have watched programmes on this before (of course they don't all return) but on the one I watched these people returned 3 times and this owner also had a pole put up on his driveway to stop them doing it, this didn't bother them. They didn't get the car as the owner woke up when they were trying to do it and chased them away but I'd agree with another poster even thought you shouldn't have to just leave the keys were they can get them. It's so scary to think people can do this. Makes you feel sick ☹️ x

Helenluvsrob · 09/08/2019 20:14

Empty the car of everything that would be an extra pain to loose eg car seats. Plan to sell , expect to have it taken ( hopefully not carjacked but have a think if they want it that much - again what do you / do not want them to take by accident eg don’t drive the kids in it for a bit and he doesn’t take confidential work info etc )

ElizaDee · 09/08/2019 20:16

I'd electrify the floor in the hallway in front of the front door and get plenty of gates to make sure the kids don't get to it.

Ive had a home invasion before, I'd take zero tolerance.

Fuck them if they get hurt on your property, they shouldn't have been there in the first place.

Just make sure you can deal with them instead of calling the police if you do catch any of the theiving cunts.

NarcolepticOuchMouse · 09/08/2019 20:34

Not sure if you're in the UK or not but if you are I would advise you check the exterior of your property thoroughly for unusual markings. Often organised crime gangs will mark a property with a symbol to indicate if it's worth breaking into or not and come back later. You can look up the symbols to know exactly which ones mean what. When my godfather was in the police and he came across them he would clearly cross them out and write the symbols for something meaning "Too risky", "Large dog" etc. as a deterrent.

DontCallMeShitley · 09/08/2019 20:40

Near us there are car thieves lifting cars off drives, I mean actually picking them up and putting them on a trailer. It might still be stolen but maybe they won't try to break in again.

A few years ago we had a 'fishing' incident where someone tried to get keys from inside via the letterbox as we had an unusual car on the drive, we have never kept keys near the door, and from that day the car was parked around the corner on the road. We got a security door fitted, a steel one with a security frame and the best lock we could find. A security letterbox too, it might take the posties fingers off but no-one can put a hand or fishing rod in and get it back out again.

plunkplunkfizz · 09/08/2019 20:45

I'd electrify the floor in the hallway

Is that really a thing? Does it shock them like an electric fence or set off an alarm like a pressure pad?

Original poster
Scaredmama1 · 09/08/2019 20:46

Thanks everyone. We've already agreed that the car has to go, it is his pride and joy but not at the expense of our babies. I'm just so glad they're little enough that they don't understand what's happened but my god bedtime as usual was tough.
Have read through all of the lovely kind and helpful messages you have written. Tomorrow's job is replacement outdoor security lights and try to get the car valued and put into practice some more of your helpful suggestions.
Thanks allFlowers

OP posts:
Hmmmbop · 09/08/2019 20:50

Please leave your keys downstairs, in easy view of someone entering, but not reachable through the letterbox.

You do not want to be held at knifepoint and asked for them if they can't find them (yes, it happened).

Crochetymum · 09/08/2019 21:07

Get a big bad dog with a nasty bark! A good dog will die for you, mine would jump in front of anything trying to hurt me. German shepherd all the way, loyal and protective, and brilliant with my kids.

Crochetymum · 09/08/2019 21:08

Plus baseball bat or crow bar next to your bed!

TitsInAbsentia · 09/08/2019 21:23

@Scaredmama1 I'm so pleased he's realised the car just isn't worth it, that and the extra security I hope you start to feel comfortable again in your own home soon, it's such a shitty thing to happen Angry

Neverender · 09/08/2019 21:26

Agree with littlepeas

TooManyPaws · 09/08/2019 21:43

When I moved into my house, i had the crime prevention officer around; he told me that my best deterrent were my two dogs. The current pack are noisy but soft lumps at heart. They pick up anyone at the gate or in the road outside (we live rurally). The disabled dog is small but sounds like the Hound of the Baskervilles with a deep bay. When I say they're soft, they're fine with people they've met coming into the house like tradesmen or the postman in through the gate, even if I'm out, but I haven't tried them with strangers. The noise would probably be enough of a deterrent.

With all this talk of weapons and electrifying things, just remember that you are only allowed to use proportionate force to protect yourself and others from a burglar. People can, and have been, jailed for GBH and murder of burglars. Anyone remember Tony Martin?

BBC News - What are your rights in tackling burglars?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-43652308

familycourtq · 09/08/2019 22:17

That stuff about criminals marking houses is total tosh - just an urban myth.

compulsiveliar2019 · 09/08/2019 22:25

Do you have a garage or could you rent one somewhere closeish by to keep car in? That way your DH can keep car but it wouldn't be visible to thieves?

Standandwait · 09/08/2019 23:15

I also was going to suggest -- council garages in estates are often available in London (though too small for an SUV if that's your car) and cheap to rent

Shooturlocalmethdealer · 09/08/2019 23:45

I know how the UK feels about guns but I am glad I own one. I'm in the US. If someone broke into my home they would be staring down the barrel of my shotgun. Protect yourselves by any means you can. So sorry this has happened to you.

NCpreggo · 09/08/2019 23:51

How horrid for you Flowers
Great that you're getting rid of the car. Just not worth it. Also agree with motion activated lights (front and back of house). You could install an alarm system which you can activate at night so that if any movement happens downstairs or the door is opened it goes off, but movement upstairs doesn't set it off.

NarcolepticOuchMouse · 10/08/2019 00:24

familycourtq - Not sure where you're getting your info from but it's pretty well documented and I'm liable to believe an actual police officer, but maybe that's just me 🤷🏼‍♀️

k1233 · 10/08/2019 00:28

Must say my keys and handbag are next to the front door. I've got a cocker and a westie. One Christmas the westie was going off his tree at the front door. Cocker joined in. It was late at night and they'd woken me up, so I was cranky. I came out rousing at them for barking to be met with a sheepish sorry from outside. One of the neighbours had been test flying a present for his kid and it was stuck on my roof. Go vicious guard dogs!

Original poster
Scaredmama1 · 10/08/2019 06:54

Thanks all. We've made it through the night. I know that's no indication of what's to come, but we've all managed a fairly restful sleep which I didnt expect. I think the stress of it all has exhausted us! Thank you all xx

OP posts:
makingmammaries · 10/08/2019 07:34

Agree with Crotchetymum, a dog, or a couple of dogs, of the kind people don’t like to mess with.

Mayagoldchoc · 10/08/2019 07:36

A security letterbox too, it might take the posties fingers off but no-one can put a hand or fishing rod in and get it back out again.

Wow. What a nasty piece of work. The royal mail should bin all the post of people who do this.