to not enjoy school holiday days out with DP and our (respective DCs).

[Pishmire]

I suspect I am being a grumpy mare but I just don't enjoy them.

DP (together 1.5 yrs - don't live together) has his DC much less often than I have mine so I understand he feels the need to go out and actively "do stuff" with them but still.....

1. I begrudge the expense (day out currently being mooted is £90 entry for us all not including food/petrol).

1. I HATE the crowds.

1. No matter what the activity, DP and his DC always want to stay the maximum time possible (literally all day) whereas my two have a go on everything and then get a bit restless and want to go home.

1. My youngest is much younger than the other three DC so often isn't big enough to do the things they're doing and (understandably) gets upset/feels left out.

1. I have to arrange for someone to look after my dog.

1. I want to spend my days off work (only in school hols) chilling out, sorting house, doing low-key nearby stuff with DC (my two are very laid-back and like to chill as much as I do).

Am I being a selfish harpy? Am totally fine for them to go off and do their own thing btw.

Bump!

Will he not go without you?

YANBU

Send them on their own. Use your youngest as an excuse!

The school holidays are long. Surely you can fit in two or three "big days out"? As for my dc wanting to go home after a couple of hours if I've spent nigh on 90quid to get in - well tough! We have a break, eat an ice cream, then go around again .

I can totally understand him not wanting to loaf around at home with the dc. Why not ask which days out he is doing and suggest a couple you will come along to with your dc?

It doesn't seem as if you are all that compatible.

Send them on their own but go on odd occasions, it's nice to try and do things together and there will be some days out your DC will want to go on.

Can't you compromise?

I totally see his viewpoint to be honest - he's spent money on a day out and wants to get the most of it, not go home early!

Separate cars and you can go home. When done? I bring a big picnic and a ball everywhere for my 1 year old. Basically he can do that anywhere for age... Throw ball, chase ball and eat. The older ones do the stuff.
But when we do this dp pays as its a day out for him n dsc not me and baby as I effectively can't go on any rides etc. Of its theme park we're talking about

We always go in separate cars and I would never expect them to leave when we do!

Usually, by the time my DC are ready to go I'm usually beyond ready so am quite relieved 😳.

For context, we've been out together a few times this summer and are going on a mini-holiday together next week so that will be activity packed. Maybe I'm just trying to conserve my energy/enthusiasm/pennies 😂.

We're not incompatible, far from it in fact. We just don't have identical preferences when it comes to how we spend time with our own DC.