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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I being unreasonable here but I’m not so sure??

75 replies

Heartburn888 · 07/08/2019 18:32

So due to go on maternity leave soon and employer has been asking about a date I want to leave which I have told her I want the 25th to be my maternity leave to start so my last working day will be 21st nov. I have 8.5 holidays to use and I want to take every Friday counting back from the 22nd as annual leave and then the half day the last Friday in September. I spoke to her and she provisionally said yes and I thought that’s great, started making plans and starting to look forward to a series of shorter weeks coz I am getting more and more tired and less motivated because I’m not sleeping well on a night.

So booked it yesterday and today been told no I can’t take it as above as I have to consider the other team members future unhooked holidays and anything they have going on in their life (not my problem if u ask me) and if I’m taking every Friday then it stops other people from taking a Friday (there are 7 of us in the office full time and 1 person 3 days a week -mon-wed -so in my opinion, plenty of cover). I think I should be able to take the holidays I’ve accrued as I please? Don’t see why just because I’m going on maternity leave I have to be considerate of others just because I’m going off for 9 months. My team leader has said holidays should be taken as a block week and a few days here and there but I’ve never done this.

Can they do this? I may be being unreasonable but I do think it’s unfair. I’ve worked there just like everyone else so I should be able to take my holidays as I please and as there’s enough cover it wouldn’t stop anyone else taking holidays. Surely it should be a first come first serve type of booking system. Also been told I need to take them as a minimum of 3 days ??

When I booked the holidays I checked the planner and no one was off which is another reason I booked it but since then my team leader has sent an email to other colleagues telling them to get holidays booked in and I checked the planner after the conversation today and she’s approved other members on the days I wanted.

Prepared to be told to shut up moaning over such a mundane issue but to me it is an issue as I feel I need something to look forward to and I have quite a lot of time off sick and think if I ha 4 day weeks then it will motivate me to do the days I need to and rest for a longer weekend.

Thoughts please?

OP posts:
BloomingHydrangea · 07/08/2019 18:36

So could you take every Monday when the additional person is in?

Original poster
Heartburn888 · 07/08/2019 18:40

She’s said I can’t take a day every week as it makes me a part time person and blocks others from taking it off.

Sorry for the massive essay just wanted to get all the info in.

I don’t think I should have to consider how she balances the work load as she is the team leader and is one of the reasons she’s paid a team leaders salary? I’m being bratty now but I’m pissed off about it

OP posts:
NeatFreakMama · 07/08/2019 18:41

I'd be really annoyed because she ready said yes. Sounds like someone higher up has put a stop to it? Not much you can do but really annoying. I'd take 3 days at a time Friday - Tuesday, then you get nice long block of 5 days as you get more tired.

blankittyblank · 07/08/2019 18:41

I don't think it's too uncommon for companies to only allow holidays in a block of time. I know of quite a few people who've tried to do what you want to do, and the company have said it's too disruptive and so it's possibly a policy. Have they ever approved anything like this before for anyone else? If so, then it's definitely unfair.

I mean, considering they have part time people who only work on set days, it does seem ridiculous that they wouldn't allow it. And if that is their policy, then it is also slightly ridiculous. But, it's also not that uncommon.

Lazypuppy · 07/08/2019 18:42

You can still have shorter weeks just pick a different day each week, why does it need to be a friday?

YABU employers can say when you can/cant take holiday, its not just up to you

RebootYourEngine · 07/08/2019 18:43

Employers can dictate when you can take holidays. Does it have to be a Friday? Could you alternate between Mondays and Fridays?

bebeboeuf · 07/08/2019 18:44

I’d be really annoyed at this.

It’s just a petty reason and far less disruptive having one person out of the office for a day a week than a week and a bit consecutively

Boom45 · 07/08/2019 18:46

Taking a day a week in the run up to maternity leave is a very very normal thing to do - I did it, most people I know did it. Full time work gets harder as you get more and more pregnant. Seems unreasonable to refuse it to me, it's annual leave and while they have to take into account business need etc they shouldn't be refusing what sounds like a very reasonable request

PennyGold · 07/08/2019 18:46

I work in a small team (similar numbers) and if someone is on holiday then nobody else can go on holiday. It'd mean that nobody in my team would be able to have a week off for 8 weeks... I wouldn't approve it.
I know you're saying that other people can go on holiday at the same time but the Friday staff will be stretched for 8 weeks.

user1471453601 · 07/08/2019 18:47

Yep, she's the team leader and she gets paid (among other things) to make the difficult decisions. She's made a decision you don't like.

SummerInTheVillage · 07/08/2019 18:51

I can see her point. I think it's a bit of a cheek to book it as you wanted to and unfair to the others. It's only a small staff.

NorthernBirdAtHeart · 07/08/2019 18:52

But a provisional yes, isn’t a definite yes.

I can sort of see where you’re coming from but YABU to expect the company to agree to something that is going to impact your colleagues and the work output.

As PP said, why does it have to be a Friday? Why not book Monday’s and you still get a long weekend?

bebeboeuf · 07/08/2019 19:07

You’ll also be off permanently for the next how ever many months after you start maternity leave so they should probably get used to it and a day a week should be manageable or they have an overstretches workforce as it is

AllFourOfThem · 07/08/2019 19:07

I think I should be able to take the holidays I’ve accrued as I please?

Unfortunately an employer has the right to dictate when you take your holidays. If only a certain number of people are allowed off at any one time, and Fridays are usually one of the most popular days, it could be that you are preventing anyone from taking a block of days off in those weeks.

Ariela · 07/08/2019 19:19

It'd be more reasonable for you to have a Monday off when the p/t person is in

Andylion · 07/08/2019 19:21

I don’t think I should have to consider how she balances the work load as she is the team leader and is one of the reasons she’s paid a team leaders salary?

Isn't that what she is doing, balancing the work load?

MsHopey · 07/08/2019 19:26

Sorry, supervisor gets the decision.
Like PP said, if only 1 person is allowed off at a time, anyone wanted to book a full week off can't for 8 weeks!
I've also known people want to book every friday off so the workplace started the policy of only allowing a minimum of a week.

Yogurtcoveredricecake · 07/08/2019 19:30

Can you go back and offer to take a different day per week? Or some sort of compromise?

I used to turn down a team member who repeatedly asked for every Friday off as it caused issues with the rest of the team and they were doing it to avoid the boring work we had to do on Fridays.

yikesanotherbooboo · 07/08/2019 19:33

Where I work you would have to fit in with everyone else or leave early for maternity leave.

adaline · 07/08/2019 19:35

Can't you compromise?

If the rule is 1 person off at a time, you're basically blocking people from taking a weeks holiday for an entire two month period!

BackOnceAgainWithABurnerEmail · 07/08/2019 19:36

Oh I’m so on the fence! I think it’s a reasonable suggestion but also they can turn down. Can you tag it all into the beginning or end instead? Are you including the holiday you will accrue or just that you already have, if the former that might be part of why they’re being sniffy.

Teachermaths · 07/08/2019 19:36

I think having every Friday for 8 weeks is a little inconsiderate. Why not vary the days?

Robs20 · 07/08/2019 19:40

My boss blocked something similar citing business need. You could get a note from your GP to say you need to work reduced hours if you are really struggling (but bear in mind this might affect your mat pay)

Original poster
Heartburn888 · 07/08/2019 19:42

She’s said I can’t book a day in the week if it’s going to be consecutively that day or any other day in the week for the next 8 weeks if that makes sense.

OP posts:
AloneLonelyLoner · 07/08/2019 19:43

YABU. From an HR perspective this kind of thing is a real pain. She offered to consider it and can't do it. It's not all about you, she has to consider everyone's needs. Just go on maternity leave earlier if it's getting too much.