To wonder if it's unfair to have children if you knowing they'll probably be your carer?

[Zippylove]

Saw a documentary on child carers, it was moving and I very much admire these young people and the love they have for the parents they care for.

A couple I know had a child knowing their child would probably become their carer when old enough. Both have illnesses, which they had before they had their ds came along. The child cannot do normal childhood things and their social life is severely restricted. Is it unfair?

But we also need to be realistic that this very rarely happens. It is exceptionally rare.

I'm disabled, I wasnt when I got pregnant with ds but when I was nearly 8 months pregnant my then husband was diagnosed with MS, went overnight from being able bodied to needing help to wash & dress, move around, getting in & out of bed. I was diagnosed with my illnesses after ds was born. I hate the fact that ds has from being only 6 years old been a carer for his dad in the main & partly for me, I would give anything for him to not need to help care for me but due to the crap social care system in this country he has no choice but to do it. He goes to young carers group at school & is a member of the young carers project in our home city. I've just watched the Ross Kemp programme on young carers & the figures quoted are that young carers save the government £150million a year in care costs, the government wont even give them a free travel card in recognition of all the work they do. It is so wrong & really sums up that they don't care that children are sacrificing their education & lives to care for ill & disabled family members.

@Nat6999 yes the social care system may be bad. But why is it your child's responsibility to pick up the "slack"? It's up to you and DH to sort out, no so your child is not affected?