.....to ask your opinions on this? It is, dare I say it, light-hearted....

[ContessaLovesTheSunshine]

So yesterday we had a get-together with our NCT group - kids were mostly aged 7 and a bit but there was a 6.5yo and a baby there as well. We all get on well, usually, as do the DC.

The thing: the 6.5yo got squirted in the head during a game/fight with the hose. One of the bigger kids was wielding it. 6.5yo was furious/upset and demanded a chance to settle the score. Bigger kid wouldn't let 6.5yo get him - kept dancing away just out of range and laughing. 6.5yo couldn't cope with the perceived unfairness of this and got very upset. Mother of the 6.5yo thinks bigger kid should have let himself get squirted, to balance the scores, and then all would have been fine. Mother of the bigger kid thinks he was perfectly in his rights to dodge getting squirted and 6.5yo should have just dealt with it. All parties were very polite about it though

Just out of interest (because it was clearly a source of disagreement!), who, if anyone, was BU?

how british to be so polite about it , just harmless fun, no one needs to equal any score.

How ridiculous 😂

6.5 year old (and parent was unreasonable). Had the age gap been 4 years I might say it was mean to squirt a little one and be unwilling to let them have a chance, but these are presumable only about a year’s difference. Parents shouldn’t let their children play games they won’t cope with.

Owner of the hose was unreasonable. These games NEVER end well.

hmm, in my mind 6.5-7.5 is the same age.

agree with pp who said if there genuinely is a difference, then I would encourage older child to play getting squirted for the younger one, like being a kind big brother/sister. But with such a close age range, it is equal.
parent of six year old should have said - Ah well, that's what happens in water fights, sometimes you get wet! If you don't want to get wet, don't join in. Never mind, good job it is sunny.

Age difference between 7 and 6.5 isn't big enough to make it unfair.

just harmless fun, no one needs to equal any score.

The 6.5yo thought otherwise and was very loud on the subject paddypaws his mother's face was a picture of conflicting emotion!

Apparently the 6.5yo didn't mind getting wet but minded not having a chance to even the score....

How did no-one predict this wouldn’t end well?!

The grownups were busy chatting and eating crisps, Shirley - we can't be expected to pay attention ALL the time!

Nah, if it was that similar in age, if you join in, you take the consequences. Would be different if there was a big age gap or in physicalty. I'd probably tell my 7year to stop gloating or tormenting if they were banging on about it but not if they were just playing and messing as part of the game

I don't think the mother of the six year old is doing him any favours by actually backing up his 'grievance' with parental support. It's a normal children's play situation among children who are roughly peers-- like a game of chasing where some children are faster than others and are caught less.

But surely he did have a chance to settle the score but couldn't reach/aim well enough?
I presume the younger child wanted the older one to stand still whilst he squirted him? It's a bit pfb behaviour, imo.
I understand why the child wanted that, but it's a water fight and that's often what happens.
I would certainly have been encouraging my 7 year old not to taunt etc though.

littleblue the bigger child did initially comply and stand still, but then jumped out of the hose range and laughed at the 6.5yo. He then ran off where he couldn't be reached.

The 6.5yo's mother did try to divert him but he was quite fixed on the perceived unfairness. His older sibling is only a year older than him but far more physically adept so I think their family setup is such that he gets given an age adjustment for 'fairness'.

7 is the age of raging injustice though.
typiclaly 7 year olds spend 20 minutes arguing about the fairness/rules of a game and 5 minutes playing.
he is hitting that stage, and mum need sot find a way to manage his raging injustice.

I was a bit mean, I told my kids - yup, sometimes life is unfair.

the 6.5 mum isn't really doing her dc any favours, she needs to lighten up a bit.