My dds are away on a weeks holiday with exh, Stepmum and step siblings .
Dd8 was worried about going as she said she sometimes feels sad when she goes to exh for the 3 nights that he has them. She feels picked on sometimes by step siblings and just generally wants to come home.
Last year I told her that she will have lots of fun and if it made her feel better that she could use daddies phone to call me or to say goodnight or I could even read them a bedtime story over the phone. Anyway when she came home she said she wasnt allowed to use his phone.
This year I got her an old phone with a sim card. I told her she could ring if she needed to chat or say goodnight and otherwise enjoy the holiday.
The first day they got there she immediately started to message and ringing sobbing saying she wanted to come home. I told her to go and speak to daddy or her stepmum and have a cuddle and they will make her feel better.she was scared of telling dad that she missed home because she didnt want to hurt his feelings. I said she wouldnt hurt his feelings and that dad was there to make her feel better and have a cuddle and will listen. Later on he messaged to say she felt better and had come out of her shell a bit.
The next day I didnt hear a single thing from her so assumed she was enjoying herself. Then today I recieve a message from her saying "mummy I still feel really sad I want to come home"
I dont want to encourage her to come home and I dont message her first so that I'm not encouraging her to miss home either. It just worries me that she is so upset and homesick.
Early this year she refused to go to exh for about 4 weeks because she hated it so much. He had taken to smacking her when she had wet herself too. Then didnt take her to the appointment that she was due to go to for the continence issues. We had waited a long time for it to come through and he said he had to take his new baby to an appointment for him instead even though there are 2 of them and 2 vehicles. I was working and so he had agreed he would take her. There is so much more backstory but it would take forever. In short I'm worried and dont know what to do for the best. She sounds miserable...