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AIBU?

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Mother pinching child's ear

23 replies

Nicedayout · 31/07/2019 14:26

So I’m standing in the queue in Sainsbury’s, and there’s this mum with three kids, a one year old in the buggy and two older children. The older boy I’d guess 5 years old was playing with his older brother. Nothing major, just a small child playing with his brother in the queue. The mother sees it, and instead of telling them to stop she decided to pinch the boys ear hard and pulled him towards her like that. He just cried and touched his ear, and that was that. She just stood there staring at her groceries on the conveyor belt.

It all happened so fast, I was in shock and didn’t know what to do. I also have three children same age as hers, and I know how stressful it is sometimes, but it made me so sad seeing that and think what else goes on behind closed doors.

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 31/07/2019 14:29

It doesn't mean anything is going on behind clised doors. Abused children don't play up in public, they're too scared to.

I don't agree with what she did, but unfortunately it wasn't enough to warrant intervention.

MamImHere · 31/07/2019 14:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PeppermintPatty10 · 31/07/2019 14:39

That’s horrid!!! It must have been a shock to see that happen - the poor little boy! Even if he’d been misbehaving then he didn’t deserve a pinch and drag.

I’d like to think that at the time I would have said ‘Ow that looks like it really hurt - don’t pinch him like that!’
Sorry OP I’m not criticising you - in the moment you don’t know what to do!

BuckingFrolics · 31/07/2019 14:43

I feel your pain OP. Sometimes I have to leave the supermarket when parents are bullying their children, or yanking them around or slapping their legs. Yes the child may be whining for something but it's shit parenting to be unable to respond in a way that does not involve verbal or physical abuse.

It makes me want to cry. Poor trapped prisoners of the spiteful or aggressive parents.

pigsDOfly · 31/07/2019 14:45

Whatever does or doesn't go on behind closed doors, it's a very spiteful thing to do.

I used to know someone, relation of exh, who if one of her children pinched or bit one of their siblings would do the same to the biting child.

I have no idea what she thought this was going to achieve. Can't imagine wanting to hurt a child like that.

IAskTooManyQuestions · 31/07/2019 14:45

Cultural inference?

mussolini9 · 31/07/2019 14:48

Abused children don't play up in public, they're too scared to.

That is 100% myth. Some do, some do not.
If diagnosis was that black & white, why are there so many abused kids behind closed doors?

NoSauce · 31/07/2019 14:49

Ow that must have hurt. Sounds pretty aggressive behaviour to me.

mussolini9 · 31/07/2019 14:50

Cultural inference?

Eh?

pam111 · 22/06/2021 18:59

I just heard that someone has said they saw a mexican lady with the 2 west boys 3 and 4 years old a week before they went missing and she was pinching the childs ear! the adoptive mother is mexican! I am going to say U think she should report this to the police. So yes, this is child abuse

seashells11 · 22/06/2021 19:01

Horrible woman and upsetting to see. The poor little boy.

dayswithaY · 22/06/2021 19:04

Mexican mother and missing West boys? I'm confused.

edenhills · 22/06/2021 19:08

@dayswithaY

Mexican mother and missing West boys? I'm confused.
Me too!
suspiria777 · 22/06/2021 19:11

@Ponoka7

It doesn't mean anything is going on behind clised doors. Abused children don't play up in public, they're too scared to.

I don't agree with what she did, but unfortunately it wasn't enough to warrant intervention.

that's a v broad generalisation. By that rule, any child who ever reports abuse can be dismissed out of hand simply on the grounds that they ever misbehave at school. Imagine if people did that! Absurd!
suspiria777 · 22/06/2021 19:12

shit didn't see this was such an old thread

vodkaredbullgirl · 22/06/2021 19:14

Shock just seen a zombie

dayswithaY · 22/06/2021 19:20

They get me every time, damn zombies!

pam111 · 23/06/2021 01:14

The boys were reported missing by their adopted parents. I have just heard that a woman was seen pinching the boys ear, a week before. So I think that this should be reported to police.

threeteenstaximum · 23/06/2021 02:07

So how does anyone think OP can report to police given it was a stranger in a supermarket queue? And it was a brief not quite sure of what she saw? Cant imagine police are going to be able to take a referral from that.

I don't know what the answer is but I'd feel uncomfortable too OP, witnessing someone pinching their child's ear in a spiteful manner
Not sure what else I can say as you took no names, no reaction at the time and it's so sneaky a thing probably wasn't caught by anyone else or even cctv

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 23/06/2021 02:17

@pam111 this post is 2 years old!

pam111 · 23/06/2021 02:32

The police have asked ANYONE who saw the boys in the past 12months to come forward

alexdgr8 · 23/06/2021 03:00

i think you are at cross purposes.

MichaelMumsnet · 23/06/2021 08:35

Hi all, this is an old thread and there seems to be some talking at cross purposes going on here. We've closed it to comments now.

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