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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

'Detained' at petrol station for not having my bank card

491 replies

Willowcat77 · 31/07/2019 07:39

Yesterday I stopped at my local village petrol station to refuel. I was on my way to pick up my DS for an important hospital appointment. I am a regular customer as it is the only petrol station/shop in the area and always get my car MOT'd there. My DP has been a customer/friend of the owners for over 20 years.

I went to the counter to pay but then realised that I'd left my bank card at home. The shop assistants knew me by sight so I said I'm really sorry but I'll need to go home to get my card, my house is only 5 minutes down the road. The assistant told me no, I would have to phone someone to pay for me and that I was forbidden to leave the premises!

I was very taken aback, but I phoned my DP. Unfortunately he wasn't answering his phone so I had to leave a voicemail. There was nobody else I could phone in the area. I was very worried about missing the hospital appointment, so I tried to reason with the shop assistants. I explained the situation and offered to leave my phone and £20 cash as security whilst I fetched my card. My petrol bill was £39. They knew I was local and my DP and I have spent 1000s of pounds there over the years.

They refused, saying if necessary I would have to stay there all day until my DP came to pay for me. They said this was "the rule". I wanted to speak to the owner but he wasn't in. I have ASD and am easily panicked. I was getting later and later for the hospital appointment and could feel I was having a proper ASD meltdown. I was getting so distressed I couldn't even redial my DPs number any more and had to ask them to do it. Eventually, after about 20 minutes, DP unexpectedly arrived and paid for me. I still feel very upset and that I can't ever go there again out of embarrassment.

My DP has since found out they did something similar to an older lady recently who was also local and a regular customer.

Aibu to feel I was treated badly and to make a complaint to the owner today? What were my rights in this situation? Could I have left to get the money?

OP posts:

Cohle · 31/07/2019 18:45

https://www.gov.uk/understanding-your-pay/deductions-from-your-pay

You should let the government know Streetwise.

madcatladyforever · 31/07/2019 18:45

They cannot detain you it's ridiculous, I'd have walked off with the words call the police then.

Tolleshunt · 31/07/2019 18:47

But OP hasn’t stolen, and it’s ludicrous to suggest she has.

The garage is indeed entitled to put recovery of every single penny without a minute’s delay, at all costs, above customer service/satisfaction, but it can expect to lose customers as a result. Maybe they earn so much they feel they can do this.

Personally, I always prefer a ‘spirit of the law’ approach over a jobsworth, ‘letter of the law’ one. I like to co-operate with friends and neighbours, and live in harmony. I don’t like the pettifogging, dehumanising, suspicious treatment the OP was subjected to, and would no longer be happy to give money to a business that treated me like that. I don’t like being treated badly, and don’t tend to go back for more.

StreetwiseHercules · 31/07/2019 18:50

I stand corrected. That is terrible.

GabsAlot · 31/07/2019 18:55

What did the owner say op-i think they were being ridiculous couldnt they have at least called the owner to check who you were or what procedure was

PaddingtonBearHardStare · 31/07/2019 19:03

I once got fuel on the way to work and as I walked in to pay was told I hope you aren't paying on card as the machine has gone down!! Didn't think to come outside to tell me before I filled up! When I said I have no other means to pay they told me to use their cash machine which was also down. I then went across the road and that cash machine was working but I made them reimburse me for the fee it charged as it wasn't my fault

saoirse31 · 31/07/2019 19:03

The staff were only following their rules, their jobs may have been at risk if they didnt. I'm not sure how your asd diagnosis is relevant , I dont see what staff would or should have done differently. No one stopped you leaving, but I presume theyd have reported you for theft if you did. Or risk their jobs for some one they may actually not even know..

GPatz · 31/07/2019 19:31

Just don't use them again. Simple.

steff13 · 31/07/2019 20:31

If this is such a common occurrence, why don't they use any kind of technology to make sure that the pump only works after you have paid instead of detaining people?

That's what happens here in the US. The pump won't work until you've paid at the pump with an approved card, or the clerk has unlocked it if you've paid inside. It really seems like the obvious solution to me.

I'm curious about these promises to pay. Are gas stations the only vendors that are expected to do this? Can you do the same at a restaurant after you've eaten?

ForalltheSaints · 31/07/2019 21:12

I do not blame the staff. After so many excuses that may have been offered by other people, they have had to follow a procedure. You made a mistake which I am sure you will not do again.

The only concern I would have is if they are only doing this to some customers and not others, which would be unfair treatment, especially if women are treated differently from men.

TodayNoMore · 31/07/2019 21:23

If any garage tried that on me, I'd give them my name and address, and leave anyway (in my car, I would not leave a phone or anything else behind either). If they tried to physically stop me leaving, I'd be the one ringing the police.

What they did was unlawful arrest.

Willow2017 · 31/07/2019 21:39

Or risk their jobs for some one they may actually not even know..

They do know the op, and her dp, they are regular customers and friends of the owner!

Cohle · 31/07/2019 21:43

Serving someone in a shop a few times doesn't mean you "know" them or have any idea at all of whether they are trustworthy. Knowing the owner is pretty irrelevant when presumably it is the owner's policy the staff were implementing.

Having a policy and applying it fairly to all customers sounds like a sensible way to avoid accusations of discrimination.

Willow2017 · 31/07/2019 21:44

If you've effectively stolen from a business I don't think your first response should be outrage that they aren't being nice enough to you about it.

Op didnt steal anything ffs!
She wanted to go home to get her purse to pay for the bloody petrol.
What if her dp had been away and uncontactable for hours?
Would they have kept her there till closing time then what?

Willow2017 · 31/07/2019 21:48

Serving someone in a shop a few times doesn't mean you "know" them or have any idea at all of whether they are trustworthy.

Now you are delibertely being awkward.

OP and her dp use the garage regularly seeing as its probably the only one for miles. Their car is mot'd there. Owner is a friend. Which part of that makes her untrustworthy? Considering they would have all her name and address, car reg on file it was pretty sure she wasnt going to disapear into the ether over £30 worth of petrol!

Hangingwithmygnomies · 31/07/2019 21:57

@Deedee248 the cardholder not present ability is normally a chargeable extra on PDQ machines. I believe it's quite a substantial amount extra because of higher risk of fraud. It's one of the reasons my husband doesn't have this function for his business

Cohle · 31/07/2019 21:58

I'm really not being awkward. I visit my local corner shop practically daily and chat away to the staff. Expecting any of them to risk their jobs by extending me credit contrary to company policy just because we chat about the weather would be ridiculous.

dustarr73 · 31/07/2019 22:18

@Willow2017 i worked in a supermarket for years.And sometimes you do get to know them.But usually for teh wrong reasons.The amount of people that would go through that garage,its just not possible to remember everybody.

themmatricc · 31/07/2019 22:23

he staff were only following their rules, their jobs may have been at risk if they didnt. well there not the police so cant detain anyone

themmatricc · 31/07/2019 22:27

The business is perfectly entitled to decide that deterring incidents of this nature is more important than being seen to provide good customer service. they do not have the right to detain anyone and say they cant leave they are not the police what they did was illegal and id of walked out

Happysummer2020 · 31/07/2019 22:30

Yes that's ridiculous. The staff obviously have been given no authority to bend the rules for regular customers.its a shame as it damages the relationship built up over years of you going there.

Deedee248 · 31/07/2019 22:33

@Hangingwithmygnomies

Thanks for that. I didn’t know that. It makes sense now you have explained it.

Cohle · 31/07/2019 22:54

they do not have the right to detain anyone and say they cant leave they are not the police what they did was illegal and id of walked out

I don't think the OP would be able to make out the offence of unlawful imprisonment personally, although she should of course seek legal advice if she wants to take the issue further.

Willow2017 · 31/07/2019 23:19

It's not a busy supermarket though is it?
It's a village garage and is owned by their friend ffs!

Walkaround · 01/08/2019 08:33

steff13 - I'm interested to know what you think a restaurant should do if you have eaten a meal and then say you're sorry, you realise you've left your bankcard at home, can you quickly go back and collect it, leaving, eg, your driving licence or mobile phone behind as security? Should they ask you to vomit up your food, instead, or spend the night washing up so they don't have to pay the zero hours contract employee? Or call the police and tell them they have a customer who did not try to run off without paying, but says they have forgotten their bankcard and can they go and get it, leaving something valuable behind to guarantee their return, and see what the police say about you contacting them over this? Or do you think people should pay for their meals in advance, too?

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