Parking & Petty Neighbour drama + diagram!

[WiddlinDiddlin]

Anyone else got a neighbour who is quite this shit stirry?

A few weeks ago, a neighbour and I (well OH he was driving), had a ding, we both reversed into each other at the same time.

Please see diagram, shes the Nice Neighbour top left corner, we are effectively bottom right corner (the one next to us thats actually the corner, has parking elsewhere)...

Everyone said 'oh bugger' and then said 'well thats 50-50 then' and we went on our merry way and resolved the issue in the appropriate fashion.

I have now discovered that neighbour immediately next door to me, sought out Nice Neighbour with whom we had the bump, and said...

'If you want me to be a witness and say that you were stationary and they were moving, I will do that...'

To which lovely neighbour said no need its all sorted etc etc...

And then neighbour immediately next door to me said:

'I've heard Mr Widdlin taking the piss out of you in the back yard... '

Please refer to the diagram again - as our car is much larger than nice neighbours, there is no way on this planet my immediate neighbour could have seen clearly through her planted front garden, that nice neighbours car was stationary when the two cars made contact.

Not unless, she can see through metal... but maybe she can because if she heard Mr Widdlin in the garden taking the piss out of nice neighbour, that would be a miracle...

The only conversation we ever have out there is about/to the dogs and this conversation never happened!

So she's willing to lie to an insurance company and try to wind up my Nice Neighbour... for zero gain since I am a Motability customer, and my insurance costs me only the excess in the event of a claim.

Ill continue to ignore her next door as I generally do because I really don't have the time for such ridiculousness... but I have to admit when I heard what she's been saying I actually found it hysterically funny she felt the need to go to such lengths!

Can anyone beat me for tales of childish behaviour from neighbours?

Nice diagram.

Nothing further to add, sorry.

Thankyou, as you can see I thought it warranted the special pens and even the use of a ruler!

I heard 'Nice Neighbour' talking to your next door neighbour, and they accused you of not only widdlin' in the street, but there was also an accusation that you were DIDDLIN' for all to see!

I (probably) live nowhere near you and may well have been at work/asleep/shopping for ice-cream at the time, however I am willing to stand up in an actual Court of Law and swear on the Bible that I witnessed next door neighbour lean in through your car window (which was open due to the heat, whilst your car was safely parked on your driveway), release the handbrake and steer your car into Nice Neighbour's stationary vehicle.

PM me OP and I'll draft a witness statement.

I am also impressed by your diagram. Gold star worthy!

I'll need a diagram to confirm all this Betsy... there's gotta be a diagram!

YABU I don't understand the point of your post you're not asking anything

Excellent diagram.
Just checking you and nice neighbour did report the prang to your insurers? Even if no claims made I think you probably should.

Purple - I am asking for other tales of ridiculous neighbour behaviour, I guess 'AIBU' to find this ridiculously ridiculous and hysterically funny?

John - yes the event was reported to both relevant insurers that same day - as its a motability car I have no option but to play things entirely by the book even if i wanted to be a dodgy WiddlinDiddlin.

Did Mr Widdlin say rude things about Mrs Nice prior to the accident?

Let it go and just keep your distance from said neighbour in future.

Amazing diagram btw. I have diagram envy

Windy - no, Mrs Nice Neighbour keeps herself to herself and there has never been any scope for saying anything at all, even if we were of a mind to!

We don't chat in our back yard at all as I rarely go out there (it isn't very accessible for me) so if we were pushed to have a moan about anyone, it certainly wouldn't be there!

I feel sorry for 'irrelevant neighbour'. They must mean something to someone, somewhere? Surely?

Oh I am sure they do... hopefully... somewhere..... :D

In fact since Fantasy Story Tell Tale gate I have to confess a deep love for my Irrelevant Neighbours (all of them, but I could only be bothered to write it out in full for one lot).

If you are reading this, I love you all, you say hi, good morning, you don't chat or 'pop round', or borrow things, have endless packages delivered to me because you are out, you rarely ever cause parking issues... In every possible way, you are fabulous, please continue to be so.

NC for this as could be outing. Sorry this is long.

Don’t know about childish but definitely strange and very annoying.

I live in a council flat with a garden. Complete shithole, everything needed ripping out and to be replaced. So proceeded to renovate at our own expense. Levelled floors, replaced all woodwork, doors, re plastered everywhere, ripped out bathroom suite (with councils permission) and replaced with something from this century. Was mindful of not pissing off anyone with the noise so kept it to 9am – 6pm.

Anyway neighbour kept asking to park on our driveway, kept saying no as had skips etc. He was quite pleasant and huge gossip chatty. I am a very private person and don’t give out personal info to anyone and don't really want to hear gossip and drama (except on mn). So would just nod along (trying to get away asap) as he was telling me all about other neighbours and how unlucky he has been with people living above him etc. Kept moaning about them and asking my advice, so I just said you need to ring to police, he then said he wasn’t allowed to ring the police for another 6 months (this was the first clue). I didn’t ask why he couldn’t contact them, didn’t think any more of it.

Few months go by, he kept trying to catch me in the garden and would lurk about until I went out there. He then told me that his other next door neighbour was angry with my dp as he had been giving him looks (?) and he was just letting me know. I laughed at this as we have had no contact with this other neighbour whatsoever, so a bit bemused. (second clue)

Anyway he became a bit of a pest always ambushing me in the garden and knocking on my door with flimsy excuses to chat to me, so I always ignored or got dp to answer.

So garden was also completely overgrown, brambles, massive trees very close to house etc. So started clearing it and relaying hardstanding to put in a greenhouse and shed. So halfway through the cementing, the council contacts us asking if we are doing building work, said yes, (had permission from tenancy officer a few months previously) told them what we were doing, they said okay fine no problems. The council then turn up the following week to check as they had complaints (to their superior) saying we were doing a living room extension .

Then discovered he had been constantly phoning the council to complain about me and dp.

He is completely unhinged and a fantasist, I have since discovered that he is a serial complainer and does this to everyone that lives in his vicinity. He just loves to create drama. So I never react to him now and completely blank him.

I spoke to his ndn (to clear the air, that didn’t need clearing) and he had also fallen out with him, he had told his ndn wife that he had caught her husband looking at women's bums walking up the street! Ndn also never said anything to crazy neighbour about my dp giving him looks so that was made up too.

I think he started his campaign because I wouldn’t let him park on our drive. There is plenty of free space on the road, no parking issues.

I could list another 20 things he has done, but I won’t bore you any more.

Omg unhinged, the worst I can say about my neighbour is that he’s lovely but achingly dull, but also a hoarder with two of every obscure item you would ever want to borrow. Dh and I have a rota for talking to him.

@PurpleWithRed this is how it starts, giving them the time of day.

PM me OP and I'll draft a witness statement

I saw it too!!!!!!!

OP, your BANG is fantastic!

I feel that I almost witnessed it myself!

Love the BANG

Unhinged egad... it is mind boggling what goes on in some folks heads!

RedHats Masketti why thankyou [grin}

It's not a cF neither storey just a bit odd.

When I was a student I stayed in some pretty crappy flats. In one we had downstairs neighbours who were ok but liked to, shall we say, experiment with odd substances.
One day I was bringing shopping in from the car, so hadn't locked our front door as I was running in and out and one of the downstairs neighbours walks right in and starts helping himself to food from the fridge.
We'd hardly talked or anything but knew his face and asked what he was doing he then proceeded to tell me off for being in HIS house!
I asked him to look around the kitchen and asked if it looked like his house.
He then thanked me for redecorating and went to sit on the couch to eat his sandwich.
I was trying to figure out what to do when there was a knock on the door and his flat mate asked me if I'd seen the dopey sod on my couch as he'd wondered off while 'not feeling himself'.
Dopey went home with his sandwich and hairy flat mate.
Next time I saw them in the hallway he kind of apologised then asked if I wanted to come in for a join to make up for it.
Was never dull living above them.

Did nice neighbour tell you that your next door neighbour had said this? I'm hoping you reassured her that you/he had said nothing of the case!
What a strange person.

Nice Neighbour relayed this to a mutual person we both know... and has been reassured that its all bollocks :) Nice Neighbour suspected this was the case anyway and simply isn't interested in such shenanigans!