In not eating birthday cake?!

[catofdoom]

I don't like cake. At all. Or I've cream. I'm also quite overweight.

At every family birthday dinner there's cake and ice cream afterwards.

Last night was dniece's. As usual I get given a plate and say 'no thank you' and have to do the 10 minutes of 'you're not having some of the birthday cake?!! Have some ice cream at least then!!' shock

DH says it's weird and a bit rude. Maybe his whole family think the same and that's why there's the shock, horror and hurt every time.

Am I being rude to decline? I could just take a piece and eat a bite but I feel like that's ruder! And wasteful.

Sorry, this is probably a contender for the most dull AIBU ever!

I would just accept it. My MIL warned me when going around to see her friend, "She will go on at you for forty minutes like Mrs Bloody Doyle, for everyone's sake, just accept what she offers."

Usually in those scenarios you can sneak your remnants out of the way, because everyone is milling around.

i just say I’m sensitive to gluten (I actually am).

Gets me out of eating a lot of crap.

Or I accept it and find a convenient place to dispose of the food.

Nope. I don’t really like cake either so usually decline. People are sometimes a bit surprised but it’s really not worth anyone making a big deal over.

Having said that, my Dad measures love by feeding people (maybe because he was a war baby) and when we were dating he'd serve dh the most enormous portions of food. I'd snarl under my breath that he'd be upset if dh left any.

With two families of feeders it's no wonder a bit of a lard arse at the moment. Thinks about getting off Mumsnet and going for a walk.

I think dh's Mum was extremely poor when she was a child (lived on the Canadian border in a hut with a family of 8 kids) so cake or ice cream was probably something they never had.

And dh and sister in law grew up vegans who didn't even have chocolate (poor fuckers thought carob was chocolate until quite late) for a long time.

Having said that, we only ever had cake at birthdays and ice cream once in a blue moon when the ice cream man took pity on us and gave us a little tub of free ice cream.

Do they know you don’t like it rather than are just ‘being good’?

Cake is the best thing in the world

YANBU.

I hate cake and (most) ice cream too. I don't understand the notion that everyone has to like both of these oversweetened, sickly 'treats.'

I don’t like either too! My friend runs a cafe and she always brings me cake, GF cake which is particularly unpleasant.

It’s hard. I try and eat some to show good manners!

Just accept it and discreetly bin it if you can, or take it with you to the loo?

Can you imagine if I clogged their toilet (on a septic system) by flushing the royal cake down the bog??????

YANBU

Recently I've stopped accepting food that I don't want and it's quite liberating. I sometimes get strange looks or comments, but I've put a lot of effort into losing weight and I don't want to undermine my efforts just to be a people pleaser. If I have a treat it needs to be worth it and something I will enjoy.

I'd just say something like "No thanks. I don't like cake and ice cream, remember?" And then add a joke about it like "No cake was harmed in the creation of these hips - it was all chocolate's fault." (Or whatever you like to eat, if not chocolate - but you get my meaning.)

YANBU Hate it when anyone forces food on me. It doesn’t matter if it’s because you don’t like it, are on a diet or whatever. It’s rude to force someone to eat it!