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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fuming about mum who I supect was lying

19 replies

Easywriter · 31/07/2007 15:11

OK, tell me if I'm bonkers.
This moring, (ironically) I'm in town buying gifts that my DD's have earnt for being dry when one of them starts jumping up and down and says she needs the loo. It's urgent.

I leave the store I'm in and head to the closest store I know has a loo. This happens to have just one loo. There's someone in it and two ladies with babies/children in buggies, who look way to young to be close to potty training, waiting.

I ask politely if there's any chance my daughter could go to the loo ahead of them at which point one of them pipes up 'oh no, she needs the loo' pointing to a child who as I said just didn't look old enough to be close to potty training. Her friend I noticed quickly averted her eyes as soon as she'd heard what her friend had said.

I didn't try to persuade either of them further as I didn't feel time was on my side and I was already thinking about where the next closest loo was.

It's been bugging me all day.

AIBU to expect an adult to give way to a desperate small child?
I certainly would and have let little ones go ahead of me in the past. Or is this thoughtless woman (sorry I know it could be possible but her kid looked just too young for her really to be out of nappies) going to have to hope that she doesn't bump into anyone as mean as herself when she actually does have to potty train her child?
Would you let a small child use the loo ahead of you?

OP posts:
HuwEdwards · 31/07/2007 15:12

In answer to your last question, yes of course I would.

GibbonInARibbon · 31/07/2007 15:13

Yes I would

Why was it ironic that is was this morning?

auntyspan · 31/07/2007 15:15

Of course, it sounds like she was being uncharitable. She probably thought you were trying it on, and you were in a hurry and you just wanted to push in.

Silly moo (her not you...!)

Original poster
Easywriter · 31/07/2007 15:15

Ironic because I was buying gifts because they'd been dry, The bit I forgot to type was that we ended up with a big wet patch because of the situation.

OP posts:
peanutbear · 31/07/2007 15:16

Yes I would and if my children werent desperate I would expect them to as well

GibbonInARibbon · 31/07/2007 15:16

ooooohhhh sorry, understand now

IdrisTheDragon · 31/07/2007 15:16

I would definitely let a small child go before me (but will say that DD potty trained at 19 months, so could have looked much too young to be out of nappies).

I think it was ironic as EW was getting presents for her DDs being potty trained this morning.

Saturn74 · 31/07/2007 15:18

Karma will get her.
Tomorrow a small child will urinate on her shoes.
And faith in human nature will be restored.

Desiderata · 31/07/2007 15:18

I think we all would, Easywriter. I would equally give up my place in the queue for anyone older than me, or to anyone who was obviously struggling to contain it!

If the child was still in nappies, she was obviously very thoughtless. I don't think you'll find any disagreement about that here.

But it is just possible that the child was potty trained.

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 31/07/2007 15:21

i think that you my be unreasonable as its hard to guage (sp????) if a child is of a potty training age.

but.......if she was fibbing then she should be ashamed of herself as its hard when they are potty training!

id surely let a little one go in front of me, and if dd wasnt in desperate need id make her wait too!

TiredFedUpNanny · 31/07/2007 18:56

What a selfish hag. Of course I would let a child go before me; I even let kids go before me in shops. But to deny a child a wee is ridiculour. Maybe she fancied standing in a pool of toddler's urine. What a cowbag.

Well done to your DD for still keeping it in. My 4 yearold charge has been 'dry' for a couple of years now and still, if she cannot get to the loo in time for whatever reason, she will just let it out. Good on your DD.

TiredFedUpNanny · 31/07/2007 18:56

Of course, as Sleepy said, she may have been exercising early toilet training, but I doubt it from the situation you describe!

newgirl · 31/07/2007 18:59

all i can suggest is that you buy a porta potty for those moments!

evenhope · 31/07/2007 19:12

Perhaps the mum was pregnant and desperate herself but too embarrassed to say?

During my latest pregnancy I've been almost wetting myself on occasion

Original poster
Easywriter · 31/07/2007 19:24

Very true, but I think from the tone in which it was delivered that it's more likely her child actually was potty trained. She was quite cocky.

I think that's been my problem with it all that her manner in no way indicated sincerity, more that she was refusing simply because she could.

I don't know, either way, thanks to a bit of posting on MN my annoyance has subsided.

I guess that I'm quite accustomed to people being lovely to children (as most people I meet are, which could be shocking in itself as sometimes (if you believe everything you read) you wouldn't necessarily expect) and I was just shocked to encounter one that wasn't at a time when we were really in need.

OP posts:
XcupcakemummyX · 31/07/2007 20:51

i would let a young child go in front
i would also ask for use of a staff loo it saves their floor
i would try a portable potty
we have one also usefull for car sick children

expatinscotland · 31/07/2007 20:52

Yes, I would. But a lot of people are very rude.

balancingact · 01/08/2007 08:18

yes, i would, in answer to your question. But it's also possible the child was potty trained. we know of a child who was potty trained at 20 months and she was really ready - she was speaking very early so she could communicate that she needed the loo....

kslatts · 01/08/2007 09:13

I would always let a small child who need the toilet go in front of me, but agree with others that the child chould have been potty trained.

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