To think you should be a bit more vigilant with small children?

[Cotswoldcapers]

Currently on holiday. Shared swimming pool, hot tub, etc. The pool is 6ft deep.
We are with our teens (16+) in the pool and hot tub. Nobody else there. Hot tub on raised decking and there is a prominent sign saying for 6+ only. Pool unsupervised but with large signs saying parents are expected to supervise children and non-swimmers.
We get in hot tub. Man then appears and gets in with small child. Child is clearly under 3, let alone 6. Child keeps switching off bubbles. Dad says nothing. My kids are a bit cross at this but say nothing.
After 10 minutes of no bubbles, we get out. Small child then gets out too. Dad stays in hot tub.
We are getting towels, etc. About 5 minutes later we hear dad shout ‘where are you, x?’ He is still in the hot tub. We look up to see small child starts walking round pool edge - no flotation vest, armbands, etc. Dad remains in hot tub but keeps shouting at small child ‘stay away from the edge, x’ ‘where are your armbands, x?’the child’s mum then appears and starts shouting the same sort of stuff at her child. Sits on a lounger and doesn’t move.
Child walks all the way round the very edge of the pool - god knows how child doesn’t fall in. Dad still doesn’t move from hot tub. Mum stays on her lounger.
Even my teens start getting concerned at this point and my eldest helped the child get her armbands. Dad still doesn’t move from hot tub or mum from the lounger. The child’s (teenage) brother then appears and takes child by the hand. We leave. We all say how appalled we are. I want to go back and say something to the parents. DH says it is not our business.
AIBU to think that this a young child deserves better protection and care than this? That around water you should be shouting instructions from a distance, but provide hands on care to a small child who clearly can’t swim.
(FWIW I also think I’m being unreasonable for not saying something to the parents. I wish I had.)

I agree with you. A british 3 year old died not long ago abroad by falling in the pool and had no supervision. I think the parents are trying to blame the hotel, when actually, as horrible as it sounds their childs death is their fault for not supervising. Theres now a go find me page for the funeral. How hard is it to understand that even supervising non swimmers can have disastrous consequences let alone not supervising them.

I'd have shouted about the bubbles, if my teenagers were enjoying them and a small child was messing around.

For years I'd cringe and watch children and jump to move them from dangerous situation. Nowadays I look in the other direction. I brought my own children safely to adulthood, and if parents can't be arsed to watch their own children I'm not going to do it for them. Some people take the 'it takes a village' saying to mean that everyone else should be minding their children for them while they relax.

The child shouldn’t be in the hot tub, they are too hot for small children who can easily overheat.

Arm bands will not stop a child from drowning.

The parents are irresponsible and I would have told them.

YANBU for being concerned. I would have been uncomfortable watching them. Your DH is correct is telling you to not approach the parents of the child regarding their parenting skills, what you could have done however is raise your concerns with the hotel staff.

I lived for two years in a Mediterranean country where pools in gardens were common, as was going to seaside, swimming pools, water parks etc. A big part of their swimming lessons as small children was geared towards strength over style, floating on back, jumping in and immediately turning round to hold onto side. It was drummed into parents if they fell in it would buy a few seconds, but was no substitute for proper supervision and vigilance. In addition parents could have free water safety sessions.

Around water and traffic YANBU.

My parents won't leave my 14 year old neice home alone but will leave 2 and 4 year old nephews playing out of sight in the garden near a pond while grandparents potter about gardening and going in and out of the garage - they know where we are/ we'd hear them calling the 2 year old fell and they blamed the 4 year old for not watching his brother and fetching them - luckily the guy who cuts their lawn was there and fished him out promptly without further consequences.

People risk asses badly. Simply being in the same general area achieves little with toddlers, but the same people blow other much smaller or barely existent risks with junior school age and older children out of proportion.

@Hidingwhoiam
@YouJustDoYou

DS swims several times a week. He jumps in, turns around and swims back to the side himself while I sit on the side with my feet in the water watching. Obviously any sign of distress and I would be straight in to fish him out.

Same if I was on a sun lounger and he fell in. Whilst I do trust his swimming ability I would of course jump straight in after him to help him out.

WhenZogateSuperworm jumping in is a whole differently kettle of fish to falling in, hitting your head, panicking, swallowing and inhaling water etc.

Its great he can swim so young. My father is from a fishing family on the yorkshire coast. We were all taught to swim very young and was my dad and his friends. It's just what they have always done.

It still doesnt mean anything. A child can drown very quickly.

Your child is your child. Supervise him however you want. But I think you are being naive.

@Biancadelrioisback I was the only one out there in the garden. If I had gone in to find someone she would have been on her own. I dont speak the language. So by the time I could have let anyone know what was going on anything could have happened. I was watching her like a hawk. Nothing was going to happen to her.

don’t think a strange person approaching a small child and trying to lead them by the hand is a good thing to do. In my opinion.