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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To hate feeling judged (in this case, swimming related)

10 replies

ThankGoshItsHolidaysTomorrow · 23/07/2019 17:51

DS(7) LOVES swimming. So much so that we are always at the pool and he has loads of lessons a week (3 to 5, usually 3 or 4)). It's a small, local pool, so I've got on friendly terms with most of the staff - in a kind of smile and say hello way, not anything more, but they r all really nice.

Today I bought DS for his regular hour lesson but the receptionist made a comment along the lines that it was mean to make him go today, especially for a long lesson, when he's tired and it's hot

DS loves swimming, and I don't feel mean taking him. He enjoys it, and when he's tired and hot there is nothing he'd rather do.

On our way in, as we went past the reception desk, I did ask him if he was ok as he has a cold, and if he wanted to swim today. He wasnt as enthusiastic as normal, so I wonder if she took that as a sign he didn't want to go? I know him well, and he'd say if he didn't want to go (quite rare! He always wants to go!)! I'm watching him now and he's been smiling through the whole lesson, jumping up and down and generally having a blast! I know that after his lesson he'll be on a high and in a great mood as he will have had a great time!

Aibu to feel a bit miffed about the receptionists comment? and like maybe other staff are also judging me and feeling like I force him to go?

OP posts:
Gamble66 · 23/07/2019 17:53

Erh ignore and be led by your child instead of worring what some random person thinks?

GroggyLegs · 23/07/2019 17:58

the receptionist made a comment along the lines...

So she didn't actually say you were mean?

I dunno, I'm getting the vibe that this was an offhand jokey comment that you've taken the wrong way.

SummerInSun · 23/07/2019 18:21

I wonder why she works in a swimming pool if she doesn't think swimming is great fun? Wrong attitude by her - she ought to be creating a positive atmosphere, not implying that swimming lessons are a chore.

You will have the last laugh when your DS is swimming for Team GB. Don't worry about it.

stucknoue · 23/07/2019 18:28

I must admit 3-5 lessons a week seems a lot for a 7 year old. I'm wondering if she meant let him try different things. I've met teens that train 5 days a week but they are choosing for themselves. If he genuinely enjoys it great, but ensure he isn't doing it to please you

mussolini9 · 23/07/2019 18:46

So people shouldn't swim because it's hot ..?

There goes the entire beach holiday industry: felled by the masterstroke of insight from a nosy receptionist.

MrsCasares · 23/07/2019 18:49

She probably said it because he has a cold.

Treaclesweet · 23/07/2019 18:52

That is a lot of lessons. Would you be disappointed if he didn't want to go? Children are very perceptive, they try to meet our expectations.

thetimekeeper · 23/07/2019 18:53

I dunno, I'm getting the vibe that this was an offhand jokey comment that you've taken the wrong way.

Same. It's the kind of joke I've heard made before. I have a hard time picturing it being said as a serious comment.

Bunnybigears · 23/07/2019 18:55

My DS is 9 and swims competitively sonis at the pool for at least 2 hrs a day every day apart from Sundays no one has ever commented. Why does he have to have so many lessons? If he goes that often he must be fairly competent now he is 7? Can he have 1 or 2 lessons and just have fun in the pool on the other days?

ThankGoshItsHolidaysTomorrow · 23/07/2019 19:09

Thanks all! I don't think it was a joke (but hoping it was and I will tell myself it was!)

Why does he have to have so many lessons - He doesn't!!! He wants to have lessons because he loves to swim and at his age if it wasn't formal lessons I'd have to be in the pool with him (but I can't as DS2 (younger) hates swimming and I can't leave him in the cafe without me!!)

Would you be disappointed if he didn't want to go - No! Of course not!!! I couldn't care less if he wanted to stop (although would be surprised and a bit curious to begin with as it's currently his passion, along with football!)

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