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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To use communal garden?

22 replies

YouDoYou18 · 23/07/2019 16:31

I haven’t done yet, but I just want to make sure that I’m okay so.

We live in a maisonette, there are also two other maisonettes and two flats. The communal ‘garden’ Isn’t much at all but I have a 10 month old who adores being outside so I would like to purchase a small paddling pool and a few outdoor toys but I’m worried this isn’t polite?

I won’t be leaving them out, we have a shed/brick storage unit and everything will be stored in there, I was also thinking of physically knocking on the doors of our neighbours and checking they don’t mind!

Can anyone see any problems? I’m not planning on using it everyday or anything as we’re often out!

P.S we’ve tried to be as polite as possible with the communal areas, we have a dog who is not allowed to use it for toileting as I feel it’s rude, so he always waits until we are out of the gate, and we always wait until late evening to hang washing just in case, my worst fear is neighbourly disputes so I’m trying to avoid any problems!

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 23/07/2019 16:33

Who else uses the garden
Why wait for the washing?

Go use it -

Alsohuman · 23/07/2019 16:33

If it really is a communal garden, of course you should use it. You’re paying for it.

Hairyheadphones · 23/07/2019 16:35

Does anyone actually use it or are you all too polite?

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 23/07/2019 16:35

Use it OP

Stompythedinosaur · 23/07/2019 16:36

I'd use it.

BarbaraofSeville · 23/07/2019 16:38

Why wouldn't you use it? That's what it's there for.

As long as you're not excessively noisy, kicking balls against windows or leaving stuff out when you've finished with it, no-one should mind and if they do, they're probably already pissed off at your mere existence, so go ahead.

Oscalina · 23/07/2019 16:39

You have as much right to use it as anyone else

scrambledeggsandbeans · 23/07/2019 16:41

I would use it OP. We have a communal garden we use it all the time as does most of our neighbours.

Original poster
YouDoYou18 · 23/07/2019 16:41

@GreenTulips

To be honest, other then for washing and a bit of gardening I’ve never seen anyone use it! A downstairs neighbour has a really cute table and chairs under her window but I’ve never seen her there! I mainly wait for the washing because we’ve only been here for 5 months and I didn’t want to accidentally ruffle any feathers!

OP posts:
Original poster
YouDoYou18 · 23/07/2019 16:42

@Hairyheadphones it’s possible we’re all too polite! Our neighbour does use it to plant some gorgeous flowers but that’s about it!

OP posts:
Witchofzog · 23/07/2019 16:43

With all due respect you are really over thinking all this. Why would doing your washing and playing with your baby ruffle feathers? As long as you are respectful you will be fune

Original poster
YouDoYou18 · 23/07/2019 16:44

@BarbaraofSeville
Oh definitely not! I mean DD does love balls, but more ball pit balls that she can hold and chew 😂 and if she does grow to love football there are two huge playing fields across the road that would be much more appropriate! They even have goals and stuff so would imagine she’d prefer that anyway!

OP posts:
Original poster
YouDoYou18 · 23/07/2019 16:46

@Witchofzog
It’s definitely possible you’re right there! A work colleague had an awful time with her neighbours and ended up being forced to sell so I think I live in fear of neighbourly disputes!

OP posts:
BlueSkiesLies · 23/07/2019 16:46

use it

don't leave stuff out overnight

enjoy

Cherry321 · 23/07/2019 16:53

Use it. Might be a good opportunity to meet a few of your neighbours etc.

plasterboots · 23/07/2019 16:55

OP how endearing is a 10 month old playing in a paddling pool in the sun.... it's lovely!

I think you'll have neighbours coming out to chat and speak to your LO!

I would

Enjoy the 🌞 🏊‍♀️!!

SunshineCake · 23/07/2019 17:14

Use it. It belongs to you!

Nurs123Bubbles · 23/07/2019 17:18

I say use it, just check that it's ok with the neighbours first maybe? Tidy up the toys etc each evening. Wrt the paddling pool, I'd ask about that separately - say it might be there sometimes overnight, and suggest that if they or their friends have kids then feel to use it too?

munemema · 23/07/2019 17:21

Use it, but a chatty knock to check what the etiquette is might be appreciated and a friendly way to meet some neighbours.

Ponoka7 · 23/07/2019 17:36

If you ask, then it gives the impression that you need permission, which opens you up to petty complaints.

I'd just go ahead. If others start to use tje gardens, then tell each other your plans.

SuzieSunshine · 23/07/2019 17:36

We also live in a maisonette but with a private back garden which is fine for us. Over the road there are about 10 flats who have quite a big communal front area which isn't used that much now. However a couple who used to rent there treated the whole area as their own garden, they had toys strewn everywhere and were never tidied up or put away. They had an enormous trampoline out there for about 2 years (until someone slashed it) a paddling pool, bouncy castles for the kids birthday parties and had regular BBQ's which he'd light under elderly residents flat windows so that they had to shut their windows to stop the smoke. He was a thoroughly selfish yob and we were all SO happy when they moved. But back to the point - you sound a very nice neighbour to be concerned about what other people around you think. As it's a communal garden you have every right to use it, but if I were you and to put my own mind at rest, I'd just let people know about the paddling pool etc - you don't have to ask for their permission, just let them know what you intend to do. I'd like you to have been our neighbours!! Enjoy the summer :)

SunshineCake · 23/07/2019 17:40

Don't ask the. Neighbours. Stupid suggestion. It belongs to you so use it.

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