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Original poster

First birthday party...

88 replies

StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 09:56

I want to have a big first birthday party for my son. Loads of friends round to celebrate him making it to 12 months! He's amazing, but had a rocky start in life.

My question... How in advance would you send invitations if you have many people travelling from up to 250 miles away? 1 month? 4 months? I have no idea!

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 22/07/2019 12:59

How big is this house if you're putting them all up?

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:01

It's a 5 bed with two lounges and a dining room. What does that have to do with anything?

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 22/07/2019 13:02

So there's room for some of us then! Grin

Bookworm4 · 22/07/2019 13:03

PP aren’t being obtuse, it’s not difficult to decide a date for a birthday party; you know when your sons birthday is! Pick a day tell people, job done.
You won’t get a good reception as people aren’t overly impressed by this attitude of ‘mine is the only baby in the world’

Lollygaggles · 22/07/2019 13:05

I would suggest the first weekend in October, then you're clear of half term and send the invitations out on the first of August.

Sorted. Grin

Blueroses99 · 22/07/2019 13:09

My LO also had a rocky start to life and we planned a huge 1st birthday party because a lot of the family hadn’t met her yet but we wanted to thank them for their support. By the time she was home and settled (medically) we hit the winter bug season and avoided socialising. So I started planning in January and issued invites as soon as the venue was booked for an April birthday. It’s such a huge milestone, I totally get where you are coming from.

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:10

It's my dad's house. I had to go there as I left a dangerous abusive relationship where me and my baby son were both abused. I am still really struggling with this. I wrote a post about it last night. I know I'm coming across as thick or idiotic not knowing when to send out an invitation. I don't mean to. I've been stuck in a highly abusive relationship, I can't remember the last time I was even allowed to invite someone round let alone throw a party. I'm not drip feeding I just didn't think any of this would be relevant at all to the initial post. I'm not stupid, I just wanted to know when someone would expect an invitation. Maybe my social skills and knowledge aren't what they once were.

OP posts:
LaMarschallin · 22/07/2019 13:11

If they're all expecting it then send the invitations now.
They'll probably be glad to have the time they need to make available to travel or whatever narrowed down.

I don't think there's a particular protocol about when you should or shouldn't send 1st birthday party invitations.

It sounds as everyone will be pleased to receive them and start planning.

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:13

I don't think my baby is the only baby in the world. I thought he was going to die when he was born, but he is still here. I just want to celebrate his first birthday in a nice way with friends and family as we have had a horrific year.

OP posts:
NoSauce · 22/07/2019 13:15

If they know when it is there’s no need to worry.

When you know what you’re doing and on what day ( bearing in mind it might not be on his actual birthday) let them know.

I think 6 weeks is plenty of time.

ShatnersWig · 22/07/2019 13:15

OP, you suffer from anxiety and you yourself have been feeling unwell as well as mentally recovering from your abusive relationship. Please ensure you are fit and well before throwing a huge party and trying to deal with a large number of guests. One of the reasons to perhaps also get in your mind now that some people may opt not to come because of distance or because they are already booked is so that you don't get more anxious and worried about it all.

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:16

@blueroses99 thank you. It's a lovely feeling when they come home isn't it! ♥️

OP posts:
IvanaPee · 22/07/2019 13:16

You’re being really defensive! Confused

I’m happy for you that you got out of a bad relationship but on the one hand you’re saying everyone gets together anyway, on the other you’re saying you have to post invitations!

If everyone knows when his birthday is and knows they’re coming, just text a date and be done with it, no?

grafittiartist · 22/07/2019 13:16

I think it's lovely- a perfect chance for families to get together. Maybe call each individually, just to give the details.

Pinktinker · 22/07/2019 13:17

Since they’ve all already asked when it is just tell them? Not sure why you’re struggling with this one.

SuzieQ10 · 22/07/2019 13:23

If I was going to attend a party that included an over night stay, I'd be grateful for 2 months notice as a minimum.

Usernumbers1234 · 22/07/2019 13:24

What a peculiar post.

“I want to know how early to send invites so that people can travel 250 miles to celebrate a first birthday party”

Responses “hmmm, 250 miles for a first birthday party seems a bit of an expectation”

OP “why are you asking that, ive already asked them about the party”

then you don’t need to invite them then....

OP “you’re all mental, I’ve had loads of these type of events, we are a big close family and we get together all the time”

Then why the hell are you asking random people of the internet, send them out the same time in advance as you did for all these other events.....

Weird thread

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:29

What a peculiar post.

“I want to know how early to send invites so that people can travel 250 miles to celebrate a first birthday party”

Responses “hmmm, 250 miles for a first birthday party seems a bit of an expectation”

OP “why are you asking that, ive already asked them about the party”

then you don’t need to invite them then....

This literally referred to some family members I spoke to who live 250 miles away. It didn't refer to everyone in between who still need to be invited.

OP “you’re all mental, I’ve had loads of these type of events, we are a big close family and we get together all the time”

Where did I say I had loads of these events? I said family members get together once a month or so. That could be just me and my brother, or a few of us. They're just family meetings, not events. I've never had another event like this

Then why the hell are you asking random people of the internet, send them out the same time in advance as you did for all these other events.....

Again, please tell me where I mentioned all these other events that never happened?

Weird thread

Yep...

OP posts:
FilthyforFirth · 22/07/2019 13:33

Bit of a pointless thread. If everyone is asking, tell them. If you want to send invites,I did for myDS 1st birthday, send them now as people are asking. Was this really thread worthy?!

Original poster
StellaLuna65 · 22/07/2019 13:35

@filthyforfirth probably not in hindsight. I was just thinking out loud to myself re when I should buy and send out some really nice invites I saw on Etsy and wasn't sure when to send them out by. Thought I would ask MN. Anyway....

OP posts:
BottomliePotts · 22/07/2019 13:38

I think the OP just got a little over excited and wanted to share

GruciusMalfoy · 22/07/2019 13:44

OP, I'd not think it unreasonable to have at least 2 months notice, more if you think there's likely to be a schedule clash for anyone you absolutely would love to be there. I'd send a quick text saying party is X date, invitations/details to follow.

All the best.

stucknoue · 22/07/2019 14:01

I would suggest save the date emails at least 3 months ahead to those who live a distance and/or are very close to you. Send invites about 6 with venue details and timings 6 weeks out.

thentherewascakes · 22/07/2019 15:39

No need to be so angry when people are replying to your questions.

I wouldn't send Invitations by post for a 1st birthday party, I don't know anyone who would. What we normally do is call, whatsapp or email. I would do it as soon as I pick up a date which you would do soon.

Sorry, but a 5 bed house doesn't sound that big for a party, I thought you were going to have a proper country house with the space Grin
Totally unsuitable to be outside in the evening if you have neighbours!

The only kids invitations that we do in paper (and same for everybody else around here) are for kids whose parents we don't really know, so have no full contact details for. Wouldn't bother with invitations if it was friends only.

If you want to do such a big do, you should rent a hall, and then your invit's can show the address which nobody would know.

Beebeezed · 22/07/2019 16:06

Hey @StellaLuna65, I’m so pleased that you get to celebrate a milestone you at one point thought you’d never reach. I’m so happy to hear your life is in a much better place. I understand that you’d want to celebrate this with the people closest to you, I would be the same Flowers

I’d say 2 months is fine Smile

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