Aibu to ask them to waive the need for a guarantor

[Tiredunicorn55]

So I have got myself into a bit of a sticky situation.

I have given my house up (due out on the 3rd August) and I’m currently staying with friends to enable me to save up to rent a bigger house as the one I had was far far too small for me and a baby- let alone all the things I need to for the baby.

I have found a house and applied for this and divulged that I am going on maternity leave in November and they have asked for a guarantor.
I’m assuming they have asked for this as I will be on reduced income and/or in receipt of universal credit for a period of time.

My problem is I have NONE to ask. My mum has an IVA and my dad is apply for his second mortgage and doesn’t want to get into golfed with it. Can’t ask my sisters or anyone else really.
Foolishly I didn’t think I would need a guarantor - it’s my first baby and thought it would be a simple straight forward process with the only obstacle being the raising of funds to get myself through the door.

Do I NEED a guarantor? I understand the reasons behind asking for one, of course, but I have an impeccable history of rental payments and household bills. I have got into a bit of difficulty with my council tax once but that was sorted within a month, but would this show on a credit check? Maybe? I don’t own my car so can’t even put that down as collateral.

Really at a loss as to what I can do now, any rental experts out there who can offer any advice? I’m not in a position pay a huge lump of rent upfront as I’ll just be able to get together the deposit and first month rent needed in time.

Any help is appreciated! Thank you

Oh whatever love. Don’t know why you keep coming back. Seriously

Some people are like their own little episode of Jerry Springer.

Private landlords maybe easier to pursue de and I may be able to find one through a friend of a friend but through an agency I think it’s a no. But will go see them tomorrow and find out.

Hey Tired,
It sounds like your going through a stressful time. I do hope you listen to what many of the posters have said.

When I had DS who is now 16 months. Me,DH and DS were living in a studio flat. Just one room and a tiny kitchen. Honestly? It was perfectly fine. When babies are young they really don’t need much. I had a small chest of drawers, Moses basket, a few bottles and clothes. My pram stayed in the boot of the car. In fact there was no lift and 2 flights of stairs. Some days it was a bit of faff but we were perfectly fine!

I assume you have a bedroom and a separate living room? If so, you honestly have adequate space for just yourself and a tiny baby. Perspective is important here OP. I know when I was pregnant I wanted so much for my little one but I had lots of people help me rationalise and rejuggle the space I had.

Everyone wants the best for their kids OP and I’m sure you believe at the moment what your doing is best for baby. But take a step back. All baby needs is a roof over its head, food and lots of love! Everything else (garden etc) are things you would like. It isn’t important right now to building a happy and safe home. I’m sure you will be able to get the house of your dreams in due time. But this can come later. Baby needs a home in 4 months.

Please do not depend on UC/council housing. I don’t know anyone in London who has 2 bedroom council house with a garden! Most of us are in flats and mine doesn’t even have parking. Remember by going down this route you are making yourself intentionally homeless. You will not be entitled to housing and if you are it is a long and difficult route. I don’t mean to be negative but being as honest as possible.

yes you are saying you want to find your own place to live, but UC will pay for it when you are on mat leave....it isnt that simple tbh. When/if you return to work its going to be hard to afford the things you think you should be able to have. I was a single parent back in the 80s...it was really hard, and i didnt have to think about finding somewhere to live

And what has Jerry springer got to do with being a guarantor? Is he considering my case ha ha ha I know my life isn’t as rosey as half of you lots on here but I would way rather have mine than be anything like anyone of you who have commented negatively.

@Tiredunicorn55 You can PM me. I've been in a similar situation.

id rather be negative laying here in my bedroom overlooking my garden than be homeless with a new baby saying 'it will be ok'...are you sure you are thinking straight...you sound like you are in cloud cuckoo land

Well seeing as I'm not homeless and about to have a baby to a man who wants nothing to do with me, whilst living in cloud cuckoo land, then you can keep your life. I have a roof over my (and my child's) head.

I think we’re just trying to give you a reality check here my love; with the best intentions possible in helping. UC is not a reliable source and I say that as someone who is STILL waiting for a payment despite starting the ball rolling and being employed but I’ll which is the most straightforward way of claiming.

OP, I thought people were being unnecessarily harsh with some of their comments. I think it’s great that you feel confident that you will somehow sort out your difficult situation, and I commend you for that, and your positive outlook.

I do think you need to be realistic though. You need an agent/guarantor/private landlord to take your circumstances into account, and maybe make some exceptions for you and your baby.

If you manage to do this, it certainly won’t be with the belligerent attitude you are demonstrating on this thread. So my only advice would be to treat people with a bit more respect when you’re asking advice or favours. Good luck with everything. I really hope your belligerent attitude doesn’t cost you though.

Haven't read the full thread but just wanted to say that I'm a guarantor for my ex-wifes rental. Kids lived with her (until xmas when they now live with me) & so to make sure they would never go homeless I acted as guarantor.

I also rent privately and the EA's asked for my income to be around 25 - 30x the monthly rent (cant remember the exact figure), so I feel this could be a problem too OP.

I feel sorry for the OP here. She’s been dealt a blow she wasn’t expecting. I think (naively, sorry OP) she was expecting to get some alternatives to needing a guarantor. Unfortunately, the way most of us understand it, that’s an unlikely outcome, but for all we know, the rental market nearby is dire and she’ll have a guarantor-free tenancy by Monday.

She doesn’t deserve criticism for her personal life/relationship choices. We’re all capable of making mistakes or walking into situations that don’t end the way we expect them to.

OP, do your research, but please, for the moment, rule in every possibility. The most important thing is that you have a safe home for your baby. Cramped/shared, whatever, but safe.

I really would try and stay where you are until you are working again and able to pay your own rent.
We rent out our house and the Landlord insurance insists on the tenants not receiving benefits. I believe if you have a buy to let mortgage this is often also a condition.
It also is no longer possible to ask for a bigger deposit to cover this as new legislation restricts the amount of deposit you can ask for.
BIL rents a studio flat, he has a steady long term job but he still needs a guarantor as the London rent is a high percentage of his wage.
You can rent housing on benefits but it is much more limited.

Op, have a look at the Shelter website, they have lots of information about how your local council could be your guarantor. It’s called the bond scheme.
It looks like there is quite a lot of help out there for people struggling to find a guarantor.
Look into it today, it could be just what you are looking for.
Also go onto your local councils website and find out what your local authority’s monthly housing benefit allowance is, if there is a huge deficit you can ask for a little more monthly help direct from your council, I think it’s called a discrete housing payment (DHP) I know they don’t like to provide this service long term but would likely help in the short term whilst you are on maternity leave.
When you are put on UC remember to apply for your council tax discount, with the old legacy benefits it was applied automatically, it’s not now.
I hope the nasty posters didn’t upset you too much last night.

Is paying six months up front not an option for you? That's what I had to do because like you there was no one suitable to be guarantor for me. None of my private LLs ever cared, in fact I think they quite liked the lump sum! Can your partner/family/baby's dad help you scrabble together the six months rent?

Have you explored if your local council offers a guarantor scheme?

OP people here are being realistic about the housing and benefits system. Not sure why you won't take that on board.

It is all very well being confident and positive about your situation and planning ahead. None of these are bad things in themselves, but you need to get out of cloud cuckoo land.

Swallow your pride and go and ask (beg) your current landlord to renew your tenancy. Do not let stubborn pride put you off doing this. A home, that is too small for you and your baby is better than no home at all.

The reality is that you need a home ASAP, so forget your movie ending dream of a nice big house with a garden, where everything is rosy for now, because that is not going to happen in the short term.

The council won't care about your situation, yes they will listen, maybe have some understanding, perhaps empathy for your situation, but you are stranger to them and the housing department hear similar stories day in day out. They also have a legal process to follow. You will not be unique, but one of the many.

Landlords and Letting Agents, may empathise with your situation personally, but they are running a business wanting a return on their investment. They are out to make a profit and make money. Unfortunately they are not going to make their money from you, so they will not rent you a house either.

That leaves you with very limited options. Stay put or trying to find a land lord, who is not on a buy to let mortgage, who is prepared to rent to someone on universal credit.

Happy lone parent day, I’m allowed an opinion. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Op, you’ve made yourself homeless, you need to give yourself a shake and see reason. The council will not help those who have intentionally made themselves homeless.

You’re not special, you’re not the exception. I’m sorry but so many people behave entitled when they have babies but it isn’t like you can just choose your dream house. LL want Secuirty, a safety net if you can’t pay or do damage. THEY HAVE FAMILIES TOO!

Why should they take a risk on you? You act like you’re entitled to their property! You’re not respectful towards them or what they own. You see it as your right.

I’m sorry you’re in this situation but you’re not helping yourself. Things don’t just magically work out, you could get in a real mess. Get proper advice, look up what’s possible and listen to what you’re told!

In your other thread a week ago you said you have a partner
Is he the baby's father and if so why isn't he planning on paying maintenance. You said you aren't able to live with him (although you mention "our house" in the other thread) but if he is still your partner then surely he should be paying half for babys costs. Could he be your guarantor or could you store some of the baby stuff at his house?

Also WRT bottles and breastfeeding - you cant store frozen milk in bottles in the freezer. You store it in bags in the freezer and defrost as required and put into a bottle to use. If your mum is looking after baby for 1 hour just feed them before and they will be ok for one hour. Expressing milk is an extra faff and extra stuff that you dont need, unless you're planning to leave the baby for a few hours at a time or going back to work.

How anyone can say I need to show people more respect on this thread is beyond me. I’ve been spoken to like a piece of crap and I’ll never show anyone respect who treats me in the manner I last night. Yeah you may call it cloud cuckoo land but that’s your opinion.

Yes might be young yes might have made a few choices without thinking it through but do I deserve to be told I’m living the dream due to my situation at the moment? No I do not. I wouldn’t dream of speaking to people like I have been spoken to here and let’s just home your daughters/sons don’t end up in a difficult situation and are treated the same.

Some of you ought to be ashamed. Can tell you were the bullies at school.

And I have taken quite a lot on board and it had given me a lot to think to think about but do you not think there are nicer ways to go about things than give someone a verbal bashing? This thread has gone from my original question spiralling off to topics that are not relevant and comments belittling me are a joke.

Yes might be young yes might have made a few choices without thinking it through

You do realise that it's not all about you anymore? You are bringing a child into this mess and your daydream of being handed a house and garden in the area you want is going to mean that child living with uncertainty and homelessness at the very time they need security. Your choices don't just impact you anymore, there is a very real little human being on their way who is going to rely on you to make choices that keep them safe.

Whilst the replies may have been blunt you haven't really helped the situation. Comments like these below show you to have no idea about the severity of the situation, which is why posters are getting frustrated. As those with more experience of the system know how this is going to end up.

I’m sure I’ll be able to pull something out of the bag

I understand about b&bs and all that but I’m really sure it’s not going to come to that.

I’m really not familiar with the benefits system or housing process.

i have come to a bump in the road

You think you’ve been treated disrespectfully on this thread?! Sweetheart, you’ve got a long road ahead.

People, strangers, have taken time to give you advice and counsel, the benefit of their experience. You don’t like the wrapping and you’re getting upset about that. You should be bloody petrified - you’re 5 months pregnant, single (as far as financial contribution is concerned: hearts and flowers ain’t gonna feed you), about to be homeless. You don’t have a guarantor and soon after the baby comes you won’t have much income.

Do you think you’re going to house, clothe and feed your baby, let alone yourself, on stubborn optimism?? On hope?!!

If you’re not as young as you come across, you’ve got some quick maturing to do. It’s not a game. There’s no real safety net these days. You’ll find that friends and family will soon tire of you and your newborn sleeping in their spare room/couch, crying through the night, exhausted, drained. And it won’t be their fault for kicking you out. It’ll be yours for getting yourself into this situation. Your mum May take the baby for an hour while you kip....what about the other 23 hours?

You’ll manage, of course you will. But your aspirations are soooooo far from just managing.