Aibu to want melatonin prescription for child?

[zzzzzzzz12345]

Nearly 10. Over 3 months not being able to sleep. We’ve sorted the night wakes but she can’t drop off til 11 or later. We’ve tried everything, had professional help etc, nothing working. We are all at our wits end. She was a perfectly normal 11 hour sleeper before that, no issues at all.

Has anyone with a child with no additional needs managed to secure a melatonin prescription for their child? I know children with autism who have prescriptions but no one without any additional needs. Just wondering if she needs a reset. It’s the only thing we haven’t tried.

I am struggling really badly with insomnia at the moment and in a safety critical job it's a huge issue.

I take vitamin d gummies in the morning, a magnesium pill in the evening (tried the spray, stung like a bitch) and I also use tart cherry juice.

I do take melatonin but find the effects wear off so it's only used as a reset for me, maybe once in 6 weeks or so, depending on how things are going. I am totally reliant on white noise and I completely understand why you don't want her to become so, for me it was partly to drown out actual noise and partly for the calming effect. I also have the calm app and use the sleep stories. I simply cannot do my job without sleep so decided that if the white noise is what it takes then so be it. I don't know what will happen in the future but would like to wean myself off it when we move to a quieter area.

I can hear your frustration in what you write and empathise. It is so distressing for me (and I do think that's an accurate way to describe it), it must be awful to watch your child go through it. I wonder whether the change to the summer holidays might help? Might take the pressure off having to have had enough sleep for school?

How much exercise is she getting? An hour’s run or hour non stop swim then a calming routine might be better than drugs. Milky drink, same gentle music tape, lavender pillow spray. Wake her earlier for a few day she until she settles at night. Stop fretting about it and give her an inordinately boring book to read by dim light. A weighted blanket is good. School holidays soon so you can relax about impact.

Couple of ideas - change all light bulbs to yellow rather than blue/white, buy chamomile flowers and make a tea each evening (in a pot so it infuses properly) with a little honey. Get valerian tea bags or leaves if chamomile doesn't work. Here (not UK) they'd tell you to add a few drops/a glug of brandy too, but it's probably not PC in UK, even if it works! Good luck.

I bought the good day sleep chocolate but have only taken it myself, I’ve never given it to a child

One of my children had a medical condition that affected their sleep not ADHD or anything like that,couldn't sleep then ended up with a serious condition caused by not enough sleep. The consultant (UK) prescribed melatonin and it worked ,helped them get better as they needed sleep to recover. I am one of those parents who has tried the usual lavender, anti histamine's, black out blinds, everything but we were all at our wits end, my child was crying with tiredness and melatonin did the trick as a reset. They were 11 at the time. You can get melatonin in several European countries at pharmacies and I found the pharmacists helpful along with knowledgeable. It was used as a reset and hasn't had an effect hormonally.

zzzzzz - I hear you. I guess if he was scared of going to sleep and/or stuggling to get up I would have approached things differently. I can't sleep very well - I have to have headphones on with something on the radio - radio 4 comedies on the bbc app work the best for some reason with the odd pod cast thrown in.

Good luck - it sounds tough.

@zzzzzzzz12345 I do feel for you. Dd19 has always been a poor sleeper despite good routine, baths, lavender oil, you name it. A diagnosis of hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome explained her sleep problems and lifelong generalised anxiety (she is the same with anything “scary”) and she was prescribed amitriptyline which does help.

Until her diagnosis though we found it most helpful to play it down and not appear stressed about her lack of sleep - this helped her accept her “bad” nights when she couldn’t sleep. The Lush sleepy cream pps suggested is great, as are Rescue Remedy pastilles or melts. Audiobooks with headphones can be a godsend. We just reassured dd that even if she couldn’t sleep, resting in bed was at least resting her body so much better than continually getting up. She also has a Lumie light which can be set to dim gradually over half an hour so I would suggest reading in bed until the light dims.

I think occasional use of antihistamine is fine tbh, especially to break the pattern. Best of luck.

OP

From what you have said, this problem seems to lie with you.

Start with yourself.

Change up her routine. As an example if she can't sleep, let her into your room to watch tele. Make it all feel relaxed, tell her it's fine, it's not a problem, worst thing that happens is she's a bit tired the next day.

If you don't like the tele (although it's what worked for me as an insomniac kid - totally removes your brain from the worry) then get her a felting kit or similar and an audio book:

Essentially, behave relaxed, distract from the problem (don't compound it with bollocks 'sleep hygiene' rules rewards etc) and hopefully it will go away. If it doesn't, then she's just tired the next day - that's ok!

Good luck

it was night fears which started this, so her sleeping has been changed by a trauma and we are trying to get it back on track.

I guess the right strategy is to work thru the after effects of the trauma.
Hope you sort it out.
Melatonin has zero effect on me. So not a miracle drug for all.

Thanks so much for all these helpful suggestions. Chocolate - I know you’re right. I need to change my approach completely. I can’t remember who said that you have to get the silver podium before the gold but I can totally see how that’s the case. I think we are all so stressed out by it and need to bring it down a notch. Seeming calm and cool is fine but the blow up shows I’m not. That filters into her for sure.

I think the same person also suggested not talking about it at all. We have always asked how they slept (so does my mum and hers before so a little cultural habit) but I’ll jnock that on the head too. Being honest, overanalysis has got us nowhere so worth trying a new approach.