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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get totally annoyed by co-workers sometimes?

16 replies

StarB3 · 18/07/2019 22:56

I love my job and the place, and I'm good friends with the people I work with. We hang out and do things outside of work, but we all have different ways of working and it really winds me up when I end up doing a lot of the work on my own while they are chatting/ off doing other things when they should be working as a team. I often get stuck past the time I was meant to finish, which i wouldn't mind if i was asked in advance, but when my kids are outside waiting for me i think it's slightly taking the piss. I can't just leave on these occassions because then out front would be left unstaffed. Sometimes I manage to keep cool and just carry on but more and more lately it's really winding me up and I don't want to fall out with my work friends. Everyone works differently and no one is perfect but some days it really pisses me off! I know i should probably speak up more but one of these people is the actual manager so I feel like I can't really say anything. I don't want to change jobs because atleast I'm secure there and there isn't much around, but it's really stressing me out and making me a moody cow when I get home.

OP posts:
NeonLights · 18/07/2019 23:19

I don’t understand why you can’t leave leave at your allocates time. Why would it be leaving “out front unstaffed”?

Whatever the reason something is clearly not right. You need to calmly raise this issue with your manager. Do it in a constructive way, “If I leave at X time I’m leaving the front unstaffed so could we...?”.

Original poster
StarB3 · 18/07/2019 23:41

Basically it's a cafe and the manager goes off leaving me there on my own and doesn't come back before I'm meant to leave. I can't leave the cafe when I'm the only one out there. I've brought it to her attention a couple times but it's still happening. I do need to find another way to get my point across I think

OP posts:
NeonLights · 19/07/2019 07:36

Take a note (dates, times) every single time this happens then “invoice” your manager for your additional hours. That should get the point across!

EleanorReally · 19/07/2019 07:38

close the shop and wait outside

EleanorReally · 19/07/2019 07:47

or let your kids inside

DisplayPurposesOnly · 19/07/2019 07:48

Ten minutes before your finish time, remind the manager that you're finishing in 10 mins.

Isatis · 19/07/2019 08:24

Tell her every time she goes out that you are going to have to leave on time, so if she isn't back you will have to close the café. And be prepared to make good on the threat. I suspect you won't have to do it more than once.

Isatis · 19/07/2019 08:25

If there are a number of people involved, can you call a meeting and ask for suggestions for solutions to this problem? That way it doesn't seem like any changes are coming from you.

ShirleyPhallus · 19/07/2019 08:26

Take a note (dates, times) every single time this happens then “invoice” your manager for your additional hours. That should get the point across!

Jesus do not do this!

Why don’t you just sit down and talk to the manager?

transformandriseup · 19/07/2019 08:43

Actually writing down your extra hours is not a bad idea. Then arrange a meeting with your manager and mention you are not being paid for those hours.

My DH did this where he works (in a supermarket) as he was always doing an extra half an hour each day and his company agreed to pay him for them.

If not and you are paid hourly and not a salary they will have to let you leave on time.

NeonLights · 19/07/2019 09:44

In my experience many managers can "overlook" how situations can negatively impact on staff. He/she will likely think it's "only ten minutes here and there" when it's not!

Presenting your manager with a breakdown of all your unpaid hours makes the issue concrete rather than abstract.

If you are on NMW and only being paid your scheduled hours it will effectively mean you are working for less than NMW which is obviously illegal. However even if you are not on NMW this situation is not on.

Original poster
StarB3 · 19/07/2019 14:17

Some good suggestions about writing down when. I will be sure to do that. I guess I'm not the most assertive person so once I'd told her a couple of times and it was still happening I gave up. But writing it down is good. Thank you

OP posts:
mussolini9 · 19/07/2019 14:55

I know i should probably speak up more but one of these people is the actual manager so I feel like I can't really say anything

The fact she is the manager means she is exactly the person you should be speaking to. I understand that sometimes it feels difficult or awkward to raise uncomfortable topics, but you need to address this. If you are being left in sole charge of the cafe at the end of your shift, you need to have a spare key so you can lock up & leave it in order to collect your kids. What happens after that should not be your problem.

As part of a larger solution, you could look into some assertiveness training, or at least read something like www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B009SAHNW6/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

CacenCrunch · 19/07/2019 15:06

The manager is taking the piss! How often is this happening?

Original poster
StarB3 · 19/07/2019 16:36

Pretty much every time I'm on a shift with her. I am in charge some days which are fine, but on the days she is there and in charge I am pretty much left to do it on my own.

OP posts:
EleanorReally · 20/07/2019 09:14

Can you ask for a key so you can lock up on time?

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