To give up parenting at the weekend

[Thegracefuloctopus]

Not every weekend and not everything!
Just this weekend and enough to get some rest in. I have tonsilitus. Im sweating with a temp, can hardly eat anything, throst covered in white spots, loosing voice etc. Yesterday i could feel myself falling asleep while driving which never happens (thankfully, came accross a drive thru costa) DS is 9 months and in the stand up sit down cry stage. He is teething and also poorly.
Last night i discovered the spots. DH couldnt give less of a shit. Told me it will pass in a few days and i need to get on with it. He is right, it will pass, but not without at least some rest.
For context, last month he had a cold but happened to be on steroids for a hives type rash that appeared all over his body. This illness took over our lives tor the best part of 2 weeks, despite the steroids taking away every issue with the cold other than the runny nose. I took him to out of hours, spoke to pharmasists for him, made him rest etc while doing everything in sight. He appears to have forgotten all of this.
He is very much of the opinion that we do equal.amounts on the weekends which i agree with to an extent but somehow still end up doing more and he still moans no end about everything he does but thats by the by.
So, wibu to say "please either take ds out (we are national trust members, as is his dad, feel free to do something with him) or have him in the house, dont care what but im off to bed to rest so i can actually go to work on monday"? Wont be there all day, but most times i do this there is a 45 minute limit and then we have to swap so he gets a lie down too... which defeats the point when im ill.

(This is kind of light hearted, but also semiserious!)

Oh this is a nice change - DP who sounds like a prat turns out not to be one. Hooray!

Get as much rest as you can. Stay in bed, drink tea, eat biscuits.

Ah, glad your DH has seen sense and realised you need your rest and some proper support from him.

Hope you feel better soon

I see you've solved the DH prob! Can you manage warm/hot drinks? I've just had lemon and ginger tea with a large teaspoon of honey mixed in, it was really nice and soothing. I've got a cold and sore throat, nowhere near as bad as yours sounds though. Hope you get your rest!

Absolutely do that! Especially with your little one's age, hardly like handing him five pre teens to deal with alone... although he still should do that as a parent ;) He doesn't even really have to do anything, pop baby in the pram, walk to the shops, have a coffee, pick up some supplies for you, watch over them while they nap at home and you will have had a good five hours rest! In our house I tend to be the more "active parent", as I work a lot less, and from home. Last year I was suddenly so poorly, I literally lay face down on the living roo floor and slept for almost 10 hours between bathroom visits. My DH took one look at me and took all the kids to the beach, there was nothing else for it if I was going to get better!

He also agrees that the swapping constantly and always having to be equal is stupid and annoying.

Why was he doing it then?

Thegracefuloctopus Thu 18-Jul-19 09:03:55
@newmomof1 and im bloody buzzing about it! Even if somehow i recover and feel better im still having it to make up for the lack of sympathy this week!

This is so sad to read. He should be stepping up & pulling his weight anyway. You are a partnership. You shouldn't need to schedule in rest time with him. If I told my DH that I was tired, he would say go and sit down, watch a film, have a sleep etc and he would get on with whatever needed doing, plus he does his share so that our time together is just that, down time together.

I'm just getting over a bout of tonsillitis it's the last day of anti B's you need to get seen. it will only get worse I left it for 4 days and by the time i went to the doc i could barely swallow and the pain had kept me up all night even though i was back to back ibuprofen and paracetamol.
I have had to nap most days and really rest up properly it's been dreadful so please please go to the docs now before it gets too bad

Just tell him firmly.

I notice that when I'm unwell, people often think I'm feeling less ill than I am, because I force myself to continue doing stuff that they wouldn't.

Might be a bit of a catch 22 'shes still looking after baby so she must feel okay' silliness. So vote with your feet and put them up.

Also go to GP as it sounds like you need antibiotics.

Go to the doctors.

Then rest

That’s awful. I’ve been very ill lately with a fluey cold that turned into chest and ear infections, my DH had to later start times at work to do nursery drop off and did all the cooking/childcare in the evenings as I could not get out of bed.