About new rings?

[Firsttimekittenowner]

I've put on a lot of weight due to medical conditions since being married and haven't been able to wear my wedding ring for about 2 years. I've said a few times to dh that I'd love new ones but we've always had other things to pay for.

He surprised me today with a new engagement and wedding ring, they weren't expensive as such(under £200) but that's a lot of money to us.

They're nice enough , my sister and best friend both love them, but they're really not my style at all - I like quite bohemian or hippy type stuff. Jewellery I usually wear is leather bracelets, earrings or rings with amber or onyx in them - I like quite unusual stuff , though my original engagement ring is argentium silver with a tiny sapphire and a plain silver wedding band. The new ones are silver, with huge halo style crystal type stones in them and very very shiny. I think he got them in the sale and so wouldn't be able to get a refund, only exchange but I've looked online at the shop and it's really just more of the same.

I don't want to hurt his feelings but I also dont feel comfortable wearing them, they're so far removed from anything else I own and would stand out like a sore thumb. Wibu if I were to tell him I dont like them ?

I think it sounds like such a lovely gesture, I’d be minded to keep them

Can you not get your current rings resized?

We have taken my original ones to be resized but were told it would be difficult and expensive. We did only ask at one jewellers though so it could be something to investigate further

You could perhaps get your original rings melted down and remade into another ring of your own design?

I don’t think I could tell him, I don’t know why exactly, but maybe because it’s a lot of money for you? And since he can’t return them there’s not a lot he can do.

Maybe wear them for a while and see if you get used to them? Sometimes we just need a bit of time to adjust to new things (you might not end up loving them, but you might think they’re actually not too bad).

I've had similar issues when DH and my mother got me expensive jewellery not my usual taste and couldn't be returned.

Strangely those items have grown on me and are now my favourites and good things always happen when I wear them. I focus on how much love went into buying them and choosing them for me and wear them with pleasure.

I would wear them. On our wedding day DH bought me earrings which are not to my taste at all. A couple of years later I lost them through our floorboards and was so gutted. They made him so happy when I wore them, and the thought really did count.

We're they bought from a high street chain jewellers? If they were they usually still refund on sale items

I would tell him. My DH wouldn’t choose me jewellery without taking me with him or fairly specific instructions.

I agree my husband bought me a necklace to mark the first 6 months together. I didn't really like it to be honest, but l didn't want to tell him that. However over time it has grown in sentimental value and l have come.to love it.

They definitely dont refund, only exchange sale items. It says on the receipt.

Thanks for the advice, I dont want to hurt his feelings so will just keep them.

You can't tell him. He's done something lovely and he would be gutted. Suck it up and just wear them sometimes.

I paid £50 last year to have a gold ring with 5 diamonds enlarged. I hadn't worn it for about 25 years due to weight gain. It was enlarged three sizes. I went to an independent local jeweller.

@samanthajayne4 that is good to know, it's definitely something I will investigate further! We only asked at one place so it's probable that somewhere else would be cheaper.

I will be keeping the new rings so as not to upset him when he clearly wanted to do something nice, it will just take some getting used to wearing them.

Remember they'll dull down with wear. New silver is always shinier.

That’s such a nice thing he’s done. Why would you want to spoil the gesture by telling him it’s not right?

I must be horrible because I would tell him I wanted to swap them

She can’t swap them. The shop only does more of the same style, so there’s no point.

@didiusfalco I already said I wont tell him, I do appreciate he was doing a lovely thing.

The saying 'it's the thought that counts' is very appropriate here.

You’re doing the right thing for sure. I think you’ll learn to love them for the thought behind it and what they represent.

You might be able to find someone on Etsy who can melt down your old ring and reuse the silver and stone to create something new with it, and you would be able to have input into the design.