How badly do celebrity deaths affect you?

[StillCoughingandLaughing]

A casual friend (former colleague) has been in a real state about a celebrity death. She has posted on FB again today, several weeks on, about how she can’t handle it and when will the tears stop coming etc. Another of her friends has replied saying she doesn’t think she’ll ever get over it 🙄

It was a sad and sudden death, but seriously? This wasn’t a relative or friend - it was someone she’s seen on TV. I do understand there is a sense of grief, but weeks of tears and sorrowful social media posts just seems so OTT.

I can think of one celebrity death I was really gutted about, but the idea that I would be in bits about it weeks later to the point that I had to get mawkish about it online seems ridiculous. AIBU for thinking that kind of grief should be reserved for someone you’ve at least met?

i was upset when Alan Rickman died as I had fancied him since I was a teenager (Barchester Chronicles), and he died on my 50th birthday, which was horrendous anyway as I had shingles. My Mum ringing up to tell me he had died, and btw, Happy Birthday, just meant the rest of the day sucked.

Not at all. I don't know them.

That said, I was very sad when I read the Judith Kerr had died. Her books were part of my kids' childhood and the lovely times we had sharing books. Also she was a remarkable person.

But I've certainly never ever shed a tear about some famous person's death

They don't.

I mean I feel sad and think it must be tough for their family but I didn't know them, I have no connection to them.

At most we have a connection to a persona but not them.

I feel sad when celebs I like pass away, but usually nothing more.

But last September when Chas Hodges from Chas & Dave died, I cried for a day. The first day of my holiday too. I landed to switch my phone on tons of messages from friends as they knew how much I loved him and his work. I'd had the pleasure of meeting him a couple of times and talking with him one to one for half an hour (as part of my job) and he was such a gentleman that it made me love him even more.

I felt gutted, such an amazing musician and big part of my life.

That's the only famous person I've cried over since Mel from Mel and Kim when I was 12! ♥️

I totally shrugged it off when Bowie died, there were some other high profile deaths that year too and I was 'meh' and a bit like you OP.

Then Prince died and I was honestly bereft for around a month. Still can't listen to his music. And I'm a little bit embarrassed about that, truth be told. But it is what it is. To be fair, I didn't plaster my feelings over social media, because I was mortified, but maybe I should have, maybe that would have made me feel better instead of being sad and embarrassed about being sad all at the same time.

I was sad when Amy Winehouse died, same with Victoria Wood and Alan Rickman, George Michael,Prince and and David Bowie. Sad for them and their families but not for myself iyswim. It wasn’t my loss.

I had a little cry when Robin Williams died- sad circumstances and he had brought me so much joy in my youth trough film. I felt sad for a few days and re watched some of his films with my dd.

I was also devastated when Dumbledore died. (Felt miserable for a week!) but I don’t think that counts!

When a figure that gives you feelings of comfort/trust/humour/joy dies it is natural to morn - even if you hadn’t actually met them!

I had a cry when Terry Pratchett died and still find it sad now not grief but its a sad thing to happen.

Alan Rickman and Rik Mayall i tend to forget and then someone will say something and i will think oh yes they are dead how sad.

Thats about it though.

I cried over Terry Pratchett.

And I have to stop and catch myself when I think of Rik mayall and Alan rickman. Only because those were all a huge part of my life, and there will be no more from them.

I really dislike the sneering at people who are affected. People are entitled to their emotions. I mean, I wouldn’t crash a funeral or turn up at their house, but it’s ok to be sad imo.

Ooh x post.

It makes me sad for some of them, especially if they are young or die in an accident, but I don’t cry. Bowie was sad, as was Victoria Wood.

I felt very sad about the boy from Descendants who died in his sleep last week. He was only 20 and my kids love him, so I had to explain that he had died. They panicked there would be no Descendants 4....

But people posting on social media weeks later about how heartbroken they are is a bit wanky.

I didn't know Victoria Wood personally but her comedy and writing had quite a big effect on me as a late teen/young adult. And I enjoyed her with my Mum who died young. I had a lot of joy and laughter from her work. I was really sad when she died because it felt as if a light had gone out. There wouldn't be any more. And it was tied up with losing my mum I suppose.

I get a bit sad about authors, actors, and musicians (only the really good ones though) because it means there won’t be any more of their work. But not at all how you describe though.

I’ve never been upset by a celebrity death, but I’m in my 30s and thankfully not many celebrities of my generation have died yet. I think it’s possible that when celebrities I’ve been watching for years like Ant & Dec die I’ll feel upset, even though I wouldn’t say I even particularly like them. But it’ll be that representation of childhood passing and mortality. Some celebrities are on TV so much you do start to get a sense of knowing them. I don’t know how I will feel when celebrities I idolised as a teenager like Thom Yorke die either.

Me - well, I was a bit sad when Jim Henson died.

DP has had horrendous depression and only certain people's work could make him feel better - he was decidedly wobbly with Robin Williams and Rik Mayall dying. His favourite musician is, to say the least, somewhat unstable and frequently gets ill enough to attempt suicide and/or threaten it - he's met him many times since he was a teenager, we've both worked/are friends with people who know him well professionally and personally and when DP was ill, he got in touch with some encouraging words and sent a CD he'd burned for him.

I don't fancy waking up one day to find out he's gone, as depending upon his mental health at the time, I have no idea how DP will react.

@scaryteacher I'm with you on Alan Rickman, he was (still is) my absolute favourite actor, 2016 was a bad year for celebrities but it took the the piss when it took Alan Rickman 😭😭

I don’t do vicarious grief over the deaths of people I never met, and I think those who do are either virtue-signalling or are mentally unstable, the former being most likely.

I'm not very attached to any, and need that real life connection to move me.
My ex FIL passed away last week. We weren't in touch and I didn't even like him particularly, but I still shed a tear when I found out.
My eldest was gutted when Robin Williams died.

I was really shocked when Peaches Geldof died, my heart broke for her two boys, they were so little and wouldn't have understood what was going on. Every now and then I feel sad that she's missed out on them growing up, sad they're growing up without their mum and sad that they won't remember her. I think it's mostly because I have two boys and I can't bear the thought of leaving them.

I really dislike the sneering at people who are affected. People are entitled to their emotions. I mean, I wouldn’t crash a funeral or turn up at their house, but it’s ok to be sad imo

Agreed. I’m not sure why people find it so difficult to understand. If you admire, or relate to, a celebrity, it’s going to be upsetting when they die, regardless of whether you knew them personally. And yes, that might involve crying and writing on social media about it. I’m not sure what the harm is in that.

It can bring up a lot of emotions too. My grandma was a big fan of Terry Wogan- when I think of her, I see her in the kitchen listening to him on the radio. So when he died a few months after my grandma, it brought up all those feelings of grief I still had.

I cried a lot over Amy Winehouse. Very saddened by Peaches Geldof, Whitney Houston and her daughter Bobby, Avicii. Keith Flint. The boy from Love Island even though I never seen the show.

When it looks like someone has everything and then they die all alone, often by their own hand it affects me very much.

Deaths can make me sad depending on their circumstance regardless of who it is.

I recall having a wee cry when Freddy Mercury died as I would never see him perform live.

It seems to be a lack of emotional self-awareness however to still be crying weeks later at the death of someone you were not at all connected with.

@ssd. Agree.

Am often sorry to hear they have passed, but they mean nothing to me personally really.

When it’s a relatively young person who I admired like Victoria Wood then I pause and think “oh, what a shame for their friends and family” but what you’re describing sounds unhinged!

If you haven't even met a person, you can feel saddened by the circumstance , or angry about it happening (think terrorism, or deaths in RTAs or stabbings, etc etc), but it is downright weird to be distraught over the death of someone famous.

Oh and how I will ball when Jon Bon Jovi goes!