This is a historical one as it came back to me tonight. My dm was a subtly abusive, emotionally neglectful, gas-lighting narc. The final straw broke my back & I cut her off. I am a talented painter & at the time of cutting off I was in the middle of painting a picture that my dm wanted to give a work colleague for her new baby's nursery. It was something we'd collaborated on. I felt responsible to finish the piece & it looked lovely. Not wanting the expense posting something so big, or for it to get lost or damaged in the post, I drove to my grans (mums, mum) & left it with her so that next time my mum visited gran she could collect it. Gran, for the record, was very old & infirm & in one of those semi-sheltered homes. I just remembered tonight how my dm wrote to me afterwards telling me I was 'Bang out of order to involve my gran' -by dropping the pic at hers. Personally, by then I didn't give a shite & it was a done deal anyway. She still got a beautiful bespoke painting for free to give her mate from herself. So, honest opinions please, wibu to involve gran?