To throw the f'ing xbox out the window.

[RollOnSummerBreak]

13yr old ds. Like many are xbox mad.
He's reluctant to go Out. For some Reasons I understand. One reason is his school mates go to the park/green near his school which is 2miles away they all live local whilst it's Not far he would cycle, but despite Locking the bike previously His Last one was vandalised beyond repair There is always fights, gangs 'jumping' people. Etc which often makes the local paper.. So yes I'd. Prefer he didn't go there.

We have a lovely green and things within minutes from home. But they're all. Younger kids and the older ones never come out unless grounded from their consoles
He decided to stop all his activities due to Wanting more screen time, scouts, football .. Which I put my foot down to, He gets 2 hours a day which yes is a lot to some but this is only when his homework done and his odd. Jobs. Making his bed. Putting his laundry away and drying up after tea.

He then started to become lazy, almost slob like and as harsh as it sounds its true.
Not washing in the morning or doing his teeth. Keeping the same Boxers on he wore to. Bed etc.
Each time this happened I removed 30 min that day.. Resulting in sulking like a 5 Yr old.
We then agreed 2 days a week. No xbox. Tues and Thurs. And.my god he's acting like a 5.yr old, huffing and puffing, stopping his feet, snatching toys off the 16m old etc. He thinks. It's going to make me give in.. Its not! ve just said if you carry on it'll be gone for a week.. His reply is well then I'll. Keep Doing this.

He said what he wanted to be when older. Which is what dp does. Dp spoke to work to arrange the 2 non x box days he could go and gain experience.. He quit after a week. Decided it was the wrong decision so dp. Said you speak to my manager and arrange it as looks. Bad on dp.. Which he did. And quit again after 1 day. Now he's saying he wants to do it again but I've said no as it's not fair on dps company which sorted insurance for him to be on the premises

What can I do

As I type. He's rolling around on the floor then moaning when the toddler goes near him

So you don't want him to go out where his friends are but you also don't want him to be on the Xbox when he's at home?

Can you try a tick list for him? Clean pants, teeth brushed, homework done, ETC then he can have his downtime on the Xbox?

What game is he into? Can't you just join in with him? If you can't beat them, etc

Failing that he'll probably just grow out of it

Why did you get him an xbox if you don't want him to go on it? You give him a hobby and then tell him he can't do it?
Being grubby and giving up Scouts probably is just a Being 13 thing. If he enjoys xbox leave him to play and maybe see if there are any gamer groups he could go to if you want him to 'go out'.

Hmm, he is being a teenager

Tried that he ripped it up
I then laminated one. He cut it up
Said. It was for babies.. But if.i could honestly video him right now and Attach I Would.
When I say younger kids. Maybe 10/11 but they're all mucking in paying football right opposite our house. He knows them all
He has. Options
My mum lives locally and friends from. His old school live there he could go There and play football
I've given so. Many options but what grates his the Loud exaggerated. Arghhhhh I'm booorrreed at the top of his voice in a growling sound. Snatching baby toys and things. Rolling the length of the lounge and saying I'd give in if he keeps doing it. I've never previously given in. In fact acting like that will get him less time. At 13 he shouldn't be doing this

Work experience at 13 sounds quite young. He also sounds incredibly immature if he's rolling around on the floor.

I'd send him up to his room and shut the door. Let him sulk it off in there (without the xbox).

I didn't stop the hobby as such I don't agree that he picked it up and dropped as pleased. If. I was an owner of a Company I wouldn't like to change my. Insurance to. Allow a younger person on premeses for them to quit.. Start and quit again.
It also don't look good on dp

And yes there's being grubby but goi g to sch smelling of bo in dirty uniform that he's not put in wash is a different thing. I know boys will. Be boys.

H

I got rid of the console from this house 18 months ago. Best thing I ever did. I hear friends complaining about their DC stuck infront of the screen and refusing to do anything. I advise getting rid. They don’t. Same story the next week.

(Yes there was tantrums and whingeing when I first got rid. I ignored. They soon stopped and now they are perfectly happy without it)

We're in a flat his room Next to lounge. I did send him in there earlier and he banged the wall constantly with his foot.

Im.going to pick dp. Up from work as his car is caput at mo and have warned him he best change his attitude

11 yo is ruined by the Xbox. We took the controllers away at the start of the year, it helped, brought it back and he turned into a mess again, stomping, cursing, shouting. Started forcing family time things more, it works sometimes and doesn't other. Family walks through woods and parklands, board games, that sort of thing. It's difficult. I don't think people without consoles in the house realise how hard it is to limit time on it but we're doing better. And id agree sit down and watch him playing and get into it a bit or watch a marvel movie with him. You kinds have to treat him like a kid even though he's getting to an age where he shouldn't be. By the way I have the laziest 11yo on the planet but hes funny and a dude so I push but not fully. Hopefully your d's will find something he loves, maybe some year bring him to some open days but also to something like a gaming convention then out to McDonald's or something. Best of luck!

He's being a typical screen obsessed teenager who can't see what to do beyond the next thirty seconds. Tell him you've got some jobs for him to do if he says he's bored. He'll soon find something else to do. Alternatively get him outside in the fresh air. Send him to the corner shop or go for a walk together with the little one? I do feel your pain, OP, but don't give in to his demands to be on the Xbox all the time. Downtime is healthy.

*Can't you just join in with him? If you can't beat them, etc

Failing that he'll probably just grow out of it*

Unless he ends up like the men complained about on here, totally addicted.

Make something tangible for him to relate to. A whiteboard style sign with the date he is allowed back on the Xbox. Something prominent so he can see it in the lounge.

When he misbehaves, the date moves forward.

I’d also make a thing about taking a photo of the sign. If it’s changed without your consent and the correct photo taken, then the date moves a week.

He sounds bored. He can't go to see his friends (for valid reasons, I know) and can't play on his Xbox. You arranged work experience but I think he's a bit young, especially when all his mates are out playing and he's stuck at home with mum and toddler sibling - that can't be much fun for him.

Do you spend any time together one-on-one? Does his dad? Could you get someone to sit the toddler and you go out and do something that's geared towards his interests once a week or so?

13 is too young for work experience......15 is more common.

I have this with my 2 boys. Aged 12 & 15. 15 yr old is ok......will shout & scream when playing on it but will understand when it has to go off. Youngest is really bad. He is on the spectrum so I make a few allowances but fight every night to turn it off at 9pm. Last week it got so bad I unplugged it & went out for a drive in my car with it on the back sest. I was gone 3 hours. I needed to calm down as much as they did.

I don't know what the answer is... when you find out can you let me know.

The hobby I was referring to was the Xbox.