To be pissed off at ex?

[NC1987]

So I've namechanged for this!

Have 3 kids with my ex partner
To be honest he's not the best father but have always supported my kids having contact with him for their sake, he's been very sporadic with maintenance over the years, which resulted in me going through the CSA a few years back, even then he regularly pays what suits him and not what they say he should..
He has just had his yearly review and they say he should be paying more than what he is, by approx £60ish a month. He contacted me asked me to come to an arrangement out with them as he can't afford the extra, I said no! Told him to talk to CSA if he can't afford it..then received a message telling me cos I won't come to an arrangement with him he's going off on long term sick what the actual f**

Am I being unreasonable to be absolutely fuming and disgusted with the cretin

Well firstly he needs to convince a Dr he needs signed off....

Please don’t use the word cretin OP..it’s a deeply offensive term these days

And if you knew him I would agree that it doesn't even compare to what he is, trust me..
But just for the record where I'm from it's not actually that offensive, just means an absolute waste of air

*you would agree

Honestly I know what it means colloquially but it actually refers to a medical condition

Yellow, he's very manipulative I'm sure he won't have a problem making something up.. I spent years with this emotionally abusive bully I know how he works..

Sorry not trying to derail your thread!

Well I apologise if I've offended anyone using that word then, had no idea it meant anything other than what I meant it as

You managed to have three children with the man so he must have had something going for him. One regrettable mistake would be understandable but three?

I'd reply 'ok, I'll let you explain it to the kids'

Rachel, didn't ask for anyone for an opinion on why I had 3 children with him, u have absolutely no idea what the circumstances were or why I stayed with him for so long.. my post was about child maintenance that is all

I haven't replied as of yet, good one tho..will call CSA on Monday and explain to them what his plans are too

Is herself employed or employed and do you know his sick entitlement?

he *self

He's employed by a company and have no idea what the sick pay entitlement is or whether his company even has one..

Rachel what an arsey comment.. And how do you know she doesn't have triplets

I would be screen shotting the messages and be forwarding them to his employer...

I agree Lucy, nothing other than the info I gave in this message is any of her business, that simple really..

Never thought of that actually, might just do that

If you forward messages to his employer then I think you’ll just be cutting your nose off to spite your face. If he loses is job then that won’t make things better will it?

Either way my kids are gonna be losing out,
Cos if he doesn't lose his job he's gonna be going off on the sick anyway..
To be fair though I probably won't inform his employer, I think his choice to go on the sick rather than pay for his kids will say enough about him as a father I don't need to do anything else

Do you have messages from him about arrangements and not being able to afford the extra or were they on the phone?

If you have messages about that, plus the one about going onto long term sick leave, screenshot them, tell him youve done it, and say that you see this as him trying to manipulate his way out of paying- and youll be forwarding this to CSA the second you get a sniff of him trying to avoid it.

Yeah I have screenshots of everything, wasn't sure if CSA would be interested though