Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To use chocolate as a reward for potty training?

68 replies

RoseGoldEagle · 12/07/2019 16:06

I read ‘The gentle potty training guide’, as I have quite liked other books written by this author. She advises not to use rewards of any kind for potty training (other than praising them), as she says children need to learn to go when they need to go, not just so they can get a reward. I nodded wisely when I read that and thought it made sense, but DD is refusing to even try and sit on the potty. If I told her she’d get a chocolate button if she does a wee on the potty, I know she’d happily try then. But would I then be creating problems? AIBU to ignore the advice and give her a reward for using the potty? Have other people successfully potty trained their children without rewards? Any advice appreciated, thanks!

OP posts:
Cornettoninja · 12/07/2019 16:10

If you’re wrong so am I. My praise just isn’t enough for my dd to be motivated so bribery it is.

bruffin · 12/07/2019 16:10

I did, DS is 23 now, he doesnt need to have a chocolate to go to the loo. It lasted all of a few weeks. DD didnt need any bribery she had a skin graft taken from her thigh and i was told to delay potty training until wound healed. She was having none of it and stating insisting she wanted to go on toilet.

francescadrake · 12/07/2019 16:12

I would just use praise. Kids love being told well done, you did a big wee!

Spirgeon · 12/07/2019 16:12

Many years ago we did a mad potty training weekend (1st child - 2nd on the way). it involved huge amounts of bribery - Thomas Tank Engine stickers. It worked. 18 years on - no wet pants! Maybe choc button is not the best but bribery works

crosser62 · 12/07/2019 16:12

Yep.
One chocolate button for a wee, two chocolate buttons for a poo.

He is 16 now and has not suffered and psychological detriment from receiving such rewards.
It worked well for us!

Original poster
RoseGoldEagle · 12/07/2019 16:12

I did, DS is 23 now, he doesnt need to have a chocolate to go to the loo

Love this, thanks!!

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 12/07/2019 16:13

I won't share what enormous bribery I used to make poo-avoiding DD agree to use the loo. It was more expensive than chocolate, that's for sure.

I tend not to use food as rewards though. For other reasons.

Chocolate1984 · 12/07/2019 16:13

I used chocolate for both of mine. Asking for chocolate after each wee/poo lasted no longer than 1.5 weeks. I gave them a square of milky bar.

BareBelliedSneetch · 12/07/2019 16:14

Chocolate bribery worked for both of mine. And was only needed for a week or two. Then they were fine.

(And only used chocolate because neither of them cared a jot for stickers!)

Kanga83 · 12/07/2019 16:17

Yes! However, a tip- use travel packs of smarties. They travel better and are smaller than normal smarties.

LulusMiniEgg · 12/07/2019 16:20

Every child is different, my DS had to be bribed with sweets for a few weeks, my DD (who I’m currently potty training) is delighted to have just the praise & chance to wash her hands again!
I didn’t believe it could be done without sweets/choc bribes until this time round and told my friends who were all potty training virgins that it was impossible to not bribe and that book was a load of rubbish. Just they wait, haha!
I now take it back and just say go with the flow of YOUR child.
One day they will all wee and poo on the toilet and possibly even wipe their own bum....

PinkCrayon · 12/07/2019 16:21

Yes ignore it.
I am potty training when the summerholidays start for us. Tried last half term it was a disaster. He hated the potty with a passion and held his urine in as he was terrified to use it.
It didnt seem as hard with my older kids who had stickers for rewards it wears off after a short while they dont require rewards for long. Nothing wrong with rewarding kids for using the potty, I know I will be trying what I can.

Thatmustbemyname · 12/07/2019 16:21

We had lots of treats on standby, but didn't directly link them to a wee or a poo. So instead of straight away saying well done, you've just had a wee, after an hour or so of having no accidents, I'd say you're being such a grown up boy today, and as a treat, here's a chocolate.

Still bribery, just in a subtly different way!

The books are great for getting tips, but don't feel you have to be a slave to them. We took bits from the Oh Crap potty training book, which worked really well, but didn't follow it to the letter.

Rinoachicken · 12/07/2019 16:21

Used chocolate stars for mine, one day he managed to squeeze out 20 teeny wee’s 😂

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted · 12/07/2019 16:22

Yup - M&M dispenser on hand in this household

That worked when we did a crash toilet training over a weekend

We've now moved on to those blowing bubble things To hold DC attention long enough to sit and do what they need to do

Just a thought but my DC hated the potty - refused to sit on it - we went straight for using the toilet with a fun step and matching kid seat and worked much better - DC was a bit older though when we started - nearly 3 and I think they felt the potty was a bit beneath them!

growlingbear · 12/07/2019 16:22

I used chocolate. One milky way star for each go on the pot. Can't remember them ever having accidents! It works. It's fine. We all do things in order to get more than a pat on the back. Human nature.

InspirationWontCome · 12/07/2019 16:23

Chocolate reward worked for me! My DS potty-trained so quickly with it. We actually went straight to toilet, didn't bother with the potty

Seeline · 12/07/2019 16:26

One of mine responded best to stickers. The other loved different ink stamps on their hand. Both loved chocolate, but we kept smarties for helping medicine go down 😁

Siameasy · 12/07/2019 16:28

Oh Crap was excellent for us. It depends what your DC is like. I didn’t use bribes or rewards because I knew it wasn’t DD’s style. Some kids will respond but DD required military style action.

User8888888 · 12/07/2019 16:39

I did mega bribery. Stickers for wees, chocolate buttons for poo and a coveted day out for 10 poos.

babyblackbird · 12/07/2019 16:43

I had an absolute shocker with my dd doing poos in her nappy overnight because she had a complete mental block about using toilet ( wees were fine). Consulted health visitor who suggested putting box of celebrations in sight ( but not reach 😂) in bathroom as a reward if she did a poo in toilet. After months of issues she did it the very first time !

Lolly25 · 12/07/2019 16:49

Use the chocolate buttons...it wont hurt and they soon begin to realise it's no big thing to use the potty.
He may not even be ready to use it, if so put it away for a few weeks and try again.

xmasbaba2014 · 12/07/2019 16:55

I was at a talk about potty training the other week. It was held by a child psychologist, a continence nurse and an autism specialist nurse. They all said its fine using food treats as a reward.

Jesse70 · 12/07/2019 16:56

I started with buttons and praise then stickers and praise then just praise and it worked easily about a week and she was done she's 24 months

Pascha · 12/07/2019 17:00

@babyblackbird it took the promise of an entire chocolate santa to get ds1 to poo in the toilet...

Swipe left for the next trending thread