Who does NOT get teachers end of term gifts?

[louise5754]

My DH always says it's pathetic buying gifts for teachers. I've done it every July and Christmas for both my kids for the past 5 years. Often buying for the teacher and 3-4 teaching assistants.

He said he never did this and only the suck up kids do it.

I just thought it was what you do.

I read the thread and am surprised so many people feel so strongly about it! Do what makes you happy, not because of obligation etc.

My sister is a lifelong teacher now mid fifties. She does get gifts and appreciates these, but does not expect them. Many boxes of chocolates and biscuits are not helpful to those battling weight issues and high cholesterol in middle age.

If parents club together and buy gift vouchers, it is always well received.

As a teacher I never expect stuff, it’s nice but I don’t like children or parents better or worse because of presents. I have kept every single card I’ve got in my 6 yrs of teaching, especially as I’ve had a few where parents have added some really lovely comments. I usually get books for my class as when I was younger my Sunday school did books and I love them. I try to get them something they will enjoy and write a little message in each one as I really think reading is so important and I love seeing how excited they are to read the message and the book! I tend to give them to the children just before lunch so they can read it over lunch break if they want.

I can honestly say I’ve kept every single card and letter a student has ever given me. They’re in a big folder on a shelf near the dining table, and I look at them from time to time to remind myself why I’ve been doing the darned job!

The words from the children are the best thing I could ever be given.

As a secondary school teacher, you don’t get loads by the way of gifts, but when I left my last school, the parents of my tutor group sent LOADS of stuff... I couldn’t believe it! I got a fancy gin glass (plus gin, hooray!), bottles of wine, beautiful works of art by artistic or cottage industry parents, etc. I kept/drank all of it!

Just today, I was called out to reception at my new school to meet with a member of my year 11 tutor group who left a couple of weeks ago: he’d been on holiday to France, and he picked out a fancy bottle of wine to bring back for me, then walked up to the school on a lovely hot day when he could be doing any number of things. But no, he wanted to come and visit, and give me a gift. And it meant the absolute world to me.

I guess in summary, as a teacher, I don’t really care if the kids get me gifts or not. I love ‘em all (mostly), and it makes no difference in how I treat them. Myself, I buy them loads over the course of a school year, in prizes, treats, craft supplies so we can do fun activities in SEN classes, and even just in bloomin’ stationery for the classroom, since no school can afford to keep you supplied all year anymore (it’s added up to well over £100 this year on black pens alone, even before anything else!).

But the best things ever, that will be kept forever, are the words that come from the students.

You don't buy a nurse or doctor a gift every time they treat you or save your life so why should a teacher get them for doing their job. Do you buy gifts for the person serving you in the shop, or the bus driver? Didn't think so

@poster Nothingcomesforfree, yes but they only reason you would a gift from me as a parent is if my child speaks highly of you and have thrived / enjoyed being in your class throughout the year.

I don’t like contributing to class collections as it seems so impersonal. It makes sense though as teachers do not end up with lots of random gifts.

I keep reading the hours thing

Yes. Teachers to work more hours than they should for no extra pay but it isn't exclusive to that profession.
And hours go, they're not that brutal. I would rather do an extra hour or so at the end of the working day as opposed to tagged on to the end of a 12 hour night shift.

That said, I don't begrudge the teachers the gifts and I've bought/made them myself most years.

I think what gets on peoples nerves is the they work long hours, crap money and extreme pressure etc like it is the only profession with crappy working conditions. That and the children who come from families who can't afford to get anything so feel left out.

Oooooh, I nearly forgot to add! For some reason, I always get the most emotional, and feel the most love, when I get a card from the whole class!

There’s something about 25 teenagers all trying to oh-so-discreetly pass round a card under their desks (without you catching them, and you have to pretend not to notice, even though you definitely have) and write funny messages with the in-jokes you’ve shared through the year, which is so endearing.

@poster TriciaH87, if said nurse or bus driver spent 6 hours a day Mon-Fri for many weeks with my children (my most precious things-well not things but you know what I mean- in the world) then yes I would buy them a gift at the end of that year

@TriciaH87 actually when I’ve stayed in hospital I’ve always got something for the drs and nurses, when my cat was in the vets for a few days I got something for the vets and nurses. Do I give my bus driver something? No because he is only with my for 30mins max and does not interact but the drs, nurses, vets and vet nurses do. I still remember the nurse who looked after me in hospital when I was 10. His name was Gary and no where in his job description did it say to sit next to me and stroke my hand and read to me when I was in so much pain post op that was crying. He did it anyway and so when I came back for my first check up I bought him a box of chocolates and a handmade card. I don’t believe you have to get a present for anyone (even family members birthdays and Christmas) but if you genuinely think someone has gone A and B the C of D then it’s nice to show your appreciation.

I think it’s ridiculous, can you imagine 30 kids all buying teacher a gift. Bloody hell bet they think it Xmas again

They get paid to do the job, get 13 weeks holiday, and not a bad salary

No defo not, and who ever does is mad or just a sheep following the other stupid mums because they don’t want to look bad

I don’t buy presents for teachers in general. If one went above and beyond I would email them and thank them, probably let the Head know. I am NHS and actively tell my clients not to buy me presents. I love my job and don’t need chocs or wine to keep loving it. I want my clients to recover and go on and lead their lives, I don’t want gratitude, I want them to focus on themselves not me.

My work would not allow any of my team to accept a gift of £300. I find that really shocking tbh. We have to log any gifts received. It’s just an unwanted administrative task.

The parent organising my child’s teacher’s end of term present, sent a Facebook post to the class Facebook page saying she would sign the card with the names of all the parents who had contributed. I thought this was so wrong and really showed how that parent viewed the whole present buying process “hey look at me, I have contributed”.

I just thought of the parents who may not have contributed due to straightened circumstances and how shaming that could feel.

In fact next year I will suggest, the kids sign the card. All the kids.

My child's teacher is outstanding. She'll be receiving a bottle of red. It's what I can afford. I bloody love that woman, and will say so in a card. My son is a changed kid because of this teacher

At the end of the year, I write a personal note to the teachers who went "above and beyond" for my DS and I write a note to the headmaster telling him how much I appreciate the extra efforts of Teacher A in making the year successful. Handwritten, not text or e-mail. I understand that one year my letter was read aloud to the faculty at the end-of-year meeting. Teachers get plenty of complaints and very little praise.

TAs do very hard jobs, often supporting SEN kids who would otherwise not be in school and for low wages so let’s not start being disrespectful towards them.

no one is denying they work hard, but it's not disrespectful to point out that by definition, most work a lot less than a teacher, and most only work during school hours. It might be hard work, but it's still a 9 to 3 for most.

Only on MN would £200 not be much money!

It's all relative - it's nothing compare to the bonus or christmas gifts and bonuses a lot of workers get.

I have seen gift bags from very luxurious shops handed out to hairdressers at Christmas - they are still paid for their job, but some clients want to say thank you - how is that wrong?
Some clients give a bonus to their cleaners at Christmas, some people give gifts to their neighbours.

I don't understand that attitude from some posters that there should be a cap on thank you gifts for teachers - what is it to you? If some parents wants to get together and give a £50 voucher each to thank someone who has looked after and supported their child for an entire school year, why shouldn't they?

Our school does collections and so far these have ranged from £5 per child in one class to £15 in another. 30 odd kids per class it's ridiculous... £1 or £2 maybe but £15 I'm not putting in to any. It's become an every term thing too and almost like a competition. It's gone OTT in my opinion.

I’m a teacher. I write the ones who’ve been good a letter. On proper paper. And I tell them all the reasons why they’ve helped my child grow that year.

Presents are nice but it’s the fact they’re giving you a present that’s the best.

It definitely wasn't a thing when I was a kid, but I think it has now become a thing. I don't think it's just the suck ups anymore.

I really do think schools should be stopping it

Our school collects £10 from each parent at Christmas and end of year to buy vouchers for the TA/teacher.

Having been a class rep I can say roughly 70% of parents contribute. That's about £6720 per year spent on teacher gifts in a 2 form entry primary school!Each teacher gets over £100 in vouchers twice a year. I think that's pretty shocking.

I don't have a problem with teachers getting a gift from individuals if they feel they've gone over and above. But I think that's all been lost and its now just this expected transaction that goes on which is the part I object to. I've donated to the gift because I've felt pressured to do so.
An email is sent out in september asking for £30 for the year which covers the gifts and donations to the school fairs. So basically, you're asked to donate before the teacher has even done a week of teaching! By combining it with the request for money for the fair you also feel like you can't say no.

One of the many reasons I'll be glad to my youngest moves to secondary school this year.

Since reception we've done a group contribution (split between class staff) and that has worked just fine.

Its optional to donate and people can give as little or as much as they want (amount of donations are anonymous). Eliminates 30 random gifts etc.

It shouldn't be mandatory, and should be excluded from donation for the school which are sadly much needed.

But as long as you give whatever you want, if anything, why do you care if others want to contribute, and generously? It's the end of the year, no one will give preferential treatment to children if you were worried about that, no one is "buying" any favour. People want to say thank you, let them.

If some parents make it into a competition, let them too, who cares. It's only drama when you make it one.

My boys went to a tiny village school. I always bought wine/ Prosecco for their teachers and he receptionist lady. Now they're all at senior so I don't buy gifts now but I wrote an email to my sons chemistry teacher saying thanks for getting him through his GCSE, copying in the head.

Rather than adding to the enormous pile of gifts and crap for the teacher, why not bring something in for the support staff, caterers, midday supervisors, the volunteers, care taker etc, because they get nothing at all.