Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset by this

35 replies

billynomatesagain · 09/07/2019 18:48

I've just finished a course of three years and made what I thought were two good friends having been friendless up until then. Now it finished last week and they have both unfriended and blocked me.
Aibu to be upset and wonder wtf I've done wrong this time.

OP posts:
RedSkyLastNight · 09/07/2019 18:51

They may well have just seen you as a "course" friend, and just don't want to keep the friendship going now you've all finished. There is nothing wrong with that, but you're not wrong to be upset either. Why not get in touch, say you'd hoped to stay in touch after the course, and see what they say?

ReganSomerset · 09/07/2019 18:56

Oh, sorry OP. Blocking you indicates quite a strength of feeling. Maybe you're coming on too strong?

ReganSomerset · 09/07/2019 18:58

Have you tried reading a self help book about getting on with people?

Ginger1982 · 09/07/2019 19:01

Did something happen?

Mammajay · 09/07/2019 19:02

I think over dependence on Facebook can be a problem. Perhaps phone or text them?

IvanaPee · 09/07/2019 19:02

God that seems really weird!

How did things go last time you saw them?

Elliesmommy · 09/07/2019 19:02

I personally find blocking pathetic. If theres an issue why not chat about it. You're probably well rid of these people. Don't seem like people worth having in your life.

Disfordarkchocolate · 09/07/2019 19:04

I thought I had a friend in the last year of university, she disappeared as soon as we graduated. Looking back she just wanted some support and wasn't a friend, sad but lesson learned.

NerrSnerr · 09/07/2019 19:14

How do you usually contact each other? Do you always initiate? It's rude of them to block without warning but have you been sending loads of messages?

Original poster
billynomatesagain · 09/07/2019 19:17

They set up a whatsapp group, we maybe message once every few weeks but it's not always me that instigates. Last time we met it was fine, one of them missed the last day so I messaged her to say I hope she was ok which we normally did if one was absent.

OP posts:
IvanaPee · 09/07/2019 19:19

That’s truly bizarre. Are you blocked on social media?

hopeishere · 09/07/2019 19:21

Do you mean unfriended on social media?

ShirleyPhallus · 09/07/2019 19:22

”wonder what I’ve done this time”

Does this happen to you regularly then?

Original poster
billynomatesagain · 09/07/2019 19:25

I've never made friends, there is just something about me that people dislike. It's always been that way.

OP posts:
ReganSomerset · 09/07/2019 19:26

Maybe you're being unintentionally rude? Read a self help book on it and see if anything chimes?

ShirleyPhallus · 09/07/2019 19:27

In the gentlest way then, you may need to work on your social skills cos without telling us more, no one on here will know how you’re coming across to people in RL

kamikazeee · 09/07/2019 19:31

This is horrible :(

ReganSomerset · 09/07/2019 19:37

If you are breaking social norms unintentionally, you should be able to tell if you look closely. Do people suddenly have to do something and leave the conversation? Do they suddenly stop responding to what you are saying? Or start responding minimally?

IvanaPee · 09/07/2019 19:44

Oh OP I feel so sad for you. Have you never had friends?

Fluffybread · 09/07/2019 19:47

At uni, there was a girl who was pretty annoying, although I only knew her in our last year.

She friend requested everyone, and we all accepted as it wasn't worth getting on the wrong side of her as she was pretty argumentative when people disagreed with her.

A few weeks after graduating, I deleted her and a few others from my facebook "friends" as I only have people on my facebook who I actually keep in touch with, a small group of friends I regularly chat to and family. I was never going to see her again and frankly I didn't like her, the others I had nothing in common with and were fine for discussing uni work but I wouldn't talk to them for any other reason. She sent me a nasty message asking why and saying I was stuck up, I didn't reply just blocked her.

I'm not saying you're anything like that particular girl, but maybe you were a "friend" just for your course and you don't mean as much to them as they did to you.

Original poster
billynomatesagain · 09/07/2019 21:39

Do people suddenly have to do something and leave the conversation? Do they suddenly stop responding to what you are saying? Or start responding minimally?

No, none of that. I usually was the first at lectures and they would always come and sit with me.

OP posts:
Hidingtonothing · 09/07/2019 21:49

I hate to ask OP but did they gain something by spending time with you? Did you help them with the work, or maybe give lifts or something? What you've posted just makes them sound like users who've dumped you because you're no longer useful to them, in which case you don't need 'friends' like them Flowers

If I'm right though there's nothing 'wrong' with you other than the lack of confidence that can make you an easy mark for people like them, and that can be worked on and improved. They, however, will always be self absorbed arseholes and are far more likely to end up friendless than you OP Smile

Emma40fornow · 09/07/2019 21:53

Sorry to see this OP. Being blocked and unfriended is so horrible and uncalled for. Hope you're okay

Original poster
billynomatesagain · 09/07/2019 21:54

Yeah, that could be it as they both had issues which I helped them with.

OP posts:
bluebell34567 · 09/07/2019 21:56

is it possible to ask them why they blocked you? what you did wrong? you may say as a feedback.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.