Hi 😊 this is a long one so I'm going to try and be quick!
Me and my husband have been together 7 years married for three and we have three children between us (two together and husband 1 from a previous) I'll refer to children as A B and C.
From the start of our relationship my in laws have always had a close relationship with A from staying over at weekend, being picked up from school etc. and so did B once they came along.
The in laws have always had care of vulnerable children which I never had any issue with until baby C was born.
The child can be quite violent and once attacked my in law while they had hold of baby C when they were months old. My husband didn't like this so has said his parents aren't allowed to see/have children around the care child (I agreed but was his initial decision). The in laws agreed that this was an issue and said they will arrange for child to leave.
Fast forward 2 years and they still have them!
A and B had a really close relationship with in laws but now only see them birthday and Christmas ( if they can get cover for child) child C has no relationship at all and cries around them.
They always make comment about how my parents get preferential treatment when it comes to having our two children, they don't have any other kids to care for.
I've spoken to my husband about the situation but he says they've chosen this life and they have to deal with it.
My issue is now they are being rude and ignorant and basically making every birthday awkward.
Do I confront them or just let the situation continue? I feel really bad for C because of the lack of relationship.
Any input/advice welcome x