Suggestions of how to survive the mundanity of a six year old please...

[Flamingo1980]

I’d love to hear from people who have had or are having a similar experience to me... I’m really struggling at the moment with the guilt that I’m currently finding being the mother of a six year old quite boring and soul destroying.
Does anyone have any words of wisdom or can tell me when it gets better? Or how to make it better?
The back story is that she’s a well behaved, well adjusted, calm and happy kid. She was planned and wanted and I had her on my own as a single mum by choice. I don’t regret her and I do love her beyond measure.
However I’ve come to realise that due to my annoying character traits like me being introverted, noise sensitive, impatient and a low tolerance for the same mundane repetitive questions and conversations, I’m REALLY struggling. This six year old stage of constant repetition, mundane conversations about barbies, hatchimals, mermaids etc, the boring games, obsessions with poo and farts etc etc is just becoming a bit much. I hate myself for it. I obsessively think she deserves a mother who is constantly fascinated in everything she says and does. (Don’t get me wrong, I do pretend to be, but inside I just feel dead and bored senseless).
There are of course moments that I do enjoy where we connect etc, but I hate to admit I find it mostly mundane and I find myself wishing my time away.
Please help. How do I stop this? How do I become genuinely more interested in a six year olds world that I feel the polar opposite to interest wise? I welcome any suggestions as i need things to change and I feel so ashamed of myself for even thinking the way I do. Please be gentle.
Thank you in advance. Xx

I think I’m interested in some aspects of playing with my DD7 and not others. I’m not good at fantasy play with toys but I quite like art and craft, colouring and board games ( snakes & ladders, frustration etc) and activities like bike riding. So it’s about steering the activities towards things that I enjoy as well. I also think heading out for part of the day helps eg go to the library, kids film at the cinema ( £2.50 each ), ride bikes to the park ( although she won’t play without me) and then set her to work making lunch ( sandwiches, rather chunkily cut cucumber plus cold drinks), watering plants in the garden and some independent play and TV later ( Strictly, The Goldbergs, Say Yes to the Dress ) At the weekend she has a dance class on a Saturday and swimming on a Sunday which takes up time and we can always go to get coffee afterwards.... then back home. There is a farmers market once a month and we might buy a cake / honey and have a mooch about. The garden centre has a cafe plus a pet section with fish / spiders/ lizards etc that I have no intention of buying but quite like looking at. I quite like theatre and dance too so I look out for cheap tickets for performances she might like - we’ve done Ballet Boyz and Mathilda recently. I’m not saying that’s an everyday thing to do but they’re things I enjoy and it means I can steer conversation to something we both like. If we have play dates I do not lay on entertainment other than sticking a film on at some point - although one child that comes to play is always trying to rope her mother into playing games like hide & seek etc. No way - if I’ve laid on a play companion the mums get to sit and drink their coffee and chat. So stop feeling guilty... I think my DD is quite a good little companion and she’s only a year older.

Oh, sympathies! I'm an introvert too, and it's so hard. DS is a little love, but I just need time on my own. I think that would be true with anyone, but obviously it's harder with a small person.

Six is old enough to start going to see musicals at matinees. (Obviously pick your musical.) Being outside is always easier, going to do something like a stately home or a castle or a kid's outdoor museum. Or even just a walk along the canal. Or baking! I think it's okay to set the agenda a bit. And yes, I'd definitely concentrate on things you're interested in. For me that was books, films, board games and being outside. And boats, weirdly. I can remember the first time I realised DS, DH and I were all enjoying something equally together, and it was when we went for a row on the river. He was two.

We've started doing film night with DS on Saturday nights which is a lovely routine, and means I have an excuse to work my way through Pixar's back catalogue. By the evening we usually need an excuse for a break, and it's been really nice to go off searching for films I think we'll all enjoy.

Sorry that wasn’t intended as a “ look at me aren’t I a marvellous parent” it was more me agreeing that yes it can be boring but it’s possible to steer them towards the types of activities and experiences that you are interested in.

As a fellow single mum by choice, I think it's easy to put a lot of pressure on ourselves. For a long time, I felt guilty if every moment wasn't absolute bliss because I chose this (and my mother was always there to guilt-trip me, saying "well, you chose to have a baby" if I ever mentioned being sleep-deprived or having had a bad night).

A few months back, I saw a local mum friend post on Facebook about being #soblessed to have her adorable lil man. I'd just seen her pushing his younger sibling's buggy up the road at ninety miles an hour with a face like thunder, while her lil man followed ten paces behind having a massive tantrum. I guess what I'm trying to say is that kids can be draining and, if you look below the surface, we all have to fake it sometimes.

Great suggestions. This is so nice. I’m always a bit overwhelmed (in a good way) when i feel supported like this.
Divebar that’s a really nice routine and lots of good ideas in there. Not at all boasty or anything like that don’t worry 🙂.
This evening I took advice from this thread and took her out on her bike along the seafront and I enjoyed it more than I thought I would so small step!! Xxx

I wholeheartedly recommend the book Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen