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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to Australia for the weekend?!

920 replies

HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:16

My best friend (male if relevant) is getting married in the autumn. I'm in the UK (where we both grew up) he now lives in Australia.

I desperately want to go to the wedding.

It will cost £1000 for the flight plus accomodation etc over there which is in no way small money.

I have 4DC so would be asking my parents (very hands on babysitters, have had them for me and DH to go on holiday etc) to have the DC (all under 10) while DH is at work.

I would leave on a thursday AM flight and get back tuesday pm. SO literally fly in for the wedding, the day after and then back home.

Am I being totally crazy to consider this?! (Haven't actually asked DH yet!!)

OP posts:
Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 11:23

right, i've just been on the phone to my friend. he is over the moon and thinks i'm mad in equal measure. his fiancee was also there (i was on speaker) and they are both really happy for me to come.

I am going to extend to a week, looking to land in brisbane wednesday evening and then fly back monday i think. Friend says he will have thurs free to spend with me before other guests arrive and i will then leave before the other long haul traveller so he gets time with them after the wedding.

DH is moving some leave to help with the kid logistics and is very supportive of me going.

So looks like I AM GOING TO AUSTRALIA!!! shit!!! i need a sugary cup of tea!!

you guys are right, you only live once and what is a bit of jet lag to be there to celebrate with my best mate. he is really touched that i would do this.

andto the PP who asked how i would pay it back as a SAHM - DH's salary goes into a joint account, DH and I both get 'paid' an equal allowance of free spends per month into our personally account. so i would be paying it back out of my spends.

mumwon great idea. i would hope to travel hand luggage only anyway but will make sure i have a 'freshen up kit' prepared!

eeeeekkkkkk!!!!

OP posts:
BoreOfWhabylon · 07/07/2019 11:33

Yay!

Have a great time Smile

cookingonwine · 07/07/2019 11:37

Why not .... no one would blink if you said you were going to drive Scotland for the weekend if you lived in Plymouth.

Do it .. enjoy it

BadLad · 07/07/2019 11:40

Why not .... no one would blink if you said you were going to drive Scotland for the weekend if you lived in Plymouth.

Good point. Nobody would be banging on about jet-lag if you were doing that.

DobbyTheHouseElk · 07/07/2019 11:42

I think Scotland is in the same time zone. Where as Brisbane is not.....

I flew emirates and had 3x 8hr flights, with a teeny stopover in each place. 45 mins I think,. It was close, but we managed it. Now you can fly from uk to Perth, but that not going to help if you are going to Brisbane. I think Singapore changeover is better.

justilou1 · 07/07/2019 12:00

That's fabulous!!! If it makes you feel better, I was living in the Netherlands and flew to Brisbane for my mother's 70th for the weekend. It's possible! You'll be absolutely knackered when you get back. (And probably sleep all the way home) But it will be worth it!!! GOOD FOR YOU!!!

jameswong · 07/07/2019 12:02

If I could comfortably afford to do it at least at premium economy on a decent airline, I'd do it I think.

justilou1 · 07/07/2019 12:02

PS - I am living in Aus again now, but was in NL for nearly 9 years. Did that trip MANY times. Most comfortable flights with shortest stopovers were Singapore Airlines if that helped. (Also best food!)

justilou1 · 07/07/2019 12:03

(Don't go to Perth)

babbi · 07/07/2019 12:04

Brilliant!
Have fun and come back and tell us about the wedding 🎩 👰

MargaretRiver · 07/07/2019 12:09

Just FYI, in order to avoid having 2 changes of plane (at both SIN & BNE) there is the option of a direct flight from Singapore to the Gold coast with Scoop Air (SIN- OOL)
Also the option of the direct flight Heathrow to Perth (LHR-PER) then a flight from Perth to the gold coast with Jetstar (Qantas' lower cost subsidiary) (PER-OOL)
Might work put faster/easier for you, depending on days/times
(Also, go for it. I don't suppose you have enough points to get an upgrade to premium econ or business?)

MerdedeBrexit · 07/07/2019 12:10

Great stuff, I'm so glad your DH is so positive and that you've decided to go! Have a wonderful time and it would be lovely if you could come back and tell us all about it!

Cannyhandleit · 07/07/2019 12:49

Glad you DH is onboard!! Wondering if I can get away with a sneaky trip to oz anytime soon 🤔!

MummyDummyNow · 07/07/2019 12:55

Brilliant, good for you OP! What a lovely friend you are Smile Have a wonderful time.

Esspee · 07/07/2019 13:06

I've travelled that route many times. Unless it is a scenario such as seeing someone before they died then you are being completely unreasonable. It takes time to adjust. You will probably not even remember the wedding even if you managed to stay awake. I have known people start to hallucinate after a west-east journey. Don't underestimate how unpleasant it is sitting in a plane for over a day. Once you get home you will be useless as a mum for a day or two (perhaps even longer).
Have him send you a video and put your family first.You can be damned sure he wouldn't make a similar trip to see you in the same type of circumstances.

BigfanofCheese · 07/07/2019 13:12

Not RTFT but great to see you're going as it's a close friend and you can afford it!!

Was going to suggest that to keep costs down, could your friend ask if anyone he knows locally has a spare room for the few nights you're there rather than a hotel? Also yes to hand luggage only if you can, it'll keep waiting around time down and reduce risk of delay/ problems.

TheRLodger · 07/07/2019 13:27

Yanbu. Especially as it’s your bff. I think this is one of those you only live once things. And I would likely spend more time regretting not going than the actual travel time

wetpants · 07/07/2019 13:29

OP, I’ve just read this thread and I’m so glad you are going! I would have said no if it was a formal large wedding but since it’s a very small do on the beach, you will have a lot of time with your friend, bride etc and it’ll be intimate and magical.

As someone else said, this is not a jolly or holiday, it’s a one off very special event. This is what the savings are for!

We have no family support so if I was on your shoes I wouldn’t be able to go Australia, however I do go away for 2 nights every year just by myself to re-charge and my DH is very supportive of that. As a SAHM you deserve some time for yourself too and I’m glad your DH is happy for you to go away.

wetpants · 07/07/2019 13:31

Also, how many men go away to sporting events and women are just expected to get on with it with kids and work.

palahvah · 07/07/2019 13:32

Go for it. I know someone who did it the other way round for a long weekend for a wedding. Knackering but worth it. Get into Aussie time zone as soon as you can (when you check-in) and same on the way back. Time exercise, fresh air, food and sleep to help you get through it plus melatonin.
Enjoy!

amusedbush · 07/07/2019 13:40

This is so exciting!

Nononononono33 · 07/07/2019 13:41

Go OP! (And try to book Singapore Airlines if you can...)

Snowy81 · 07/07/2019 13:47

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees

Dh has to go to New York for a meeting on Tuesday literary flying to jfk going straight from airport to meeting after meeting back to the airport to fly home. He will be in America for less than 6 hours.. it’s totally bonkers but he has done it before it worked ok

No offence OP to you or your dh, but they talk about us reducing our air travel etc, and it’s not people going on one or two holidays a year, it’s companies using travel like this. Times this by the millions who are doing it daily- what’s wrong with Skype, conference calls and all the other technology I don’t knows of so can’t say! Lol, that could be used to reduce this travel?

Astra15 · 07/07/2019 14:03

How can you pay back the 1k if you're a sahm?

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 14:17

I am currently at the hell that is a soft play party with my youngest, still trying to digest that I can actually do this!!

To the pp who said he wouldn’t do the same for me, he would if it was possible for him. We have been best friends for 25 years, you make as much effort as you can for that level of friendship.

I answered how I would pay for it, from my monthly spending allowance (which is the same as DHs).

OP posts: