Is teaching really so stressful?

[summertime06]

Really trying to get my head around this without getting flamed. I have a good friend who is a teacher, part time since having kids, doing the same hours as me (I'm not a teacher), 3 days a week.

For the past year or two, all I ever heard when we met up was how stressful her job was, how difficult it was to be a teacher and a mum at the same time etc etc. I get that there's work to be done outside teaching hours, but I do the same in my completely different job and just get on with it, I think it's part of the job when you get up the pay scale/responsibility level a bit. Any time I did mention that things were similar in my job, I was put down, I couldn't possibly understand how stressful it was to be a teacher?!

And now she's made the decision to take a career break for a few years because there's just no way she can continue to be a teacher and a mum to 3 young kids. That's fine if that's what she wants to do but she's making out that she's been left with no choice but to make this decision because teaching is just so difficult. Is it just me or am I missing something? I get that it can be stressful as are lots of other jobs, but there are surely also lots of advantages? Not having to sort out summer camps and childcare during school holidays? Is it really so much more difficult and stressful compared to other jobs? I genuinely want to understand!

Another teaching thread? Wow we are getting loads on here lately.

As others have said, teaching is stressful - other jobs are also stressful. It’s not a competition.

You sound a bit dismissive of your friend, even if you do mean to be. Mental health is incredibly important and if she’s burnt out then she’s taking the right steps for herself and her family.

*dont

@summertime06 my GP said I'm jumping from the frying pan into the fire but I've had 13 years of being sworn at and bullied (by students and colleagues). My mental health can't take any more. I am returning to my love of biology and chemistry before it's eroded forever!!

I just can't begin to imagine managing 30 children all day, being responsible for their learning and their emotional welfare, dealing with all the various issues that they have. I'm the child of a teacher and my memory is my mum coming home, cooking dinner and disappearing behind piles of marking for the evening, but it's the reality of standing up in front of 30 kids all day that really boggles my mind. I suppose OP it's more akin to 30 patients accosting you for your decisions simultaneously, chucking in a myriad of as hoc demands on top. The mental load just looks on a different scale, to my mind, than anything where you're dealing with one person at a time.

I find my own children's parties exhausting, and I'm not alone - that's why people pay so much for party activities and entertainers. I run a 2 hour party and I need to retire to a darkened room with wine. 6 hours a day, day in day out, with barely time for a wee just seems superhuman to me, especially with planning and marking on top. And I think a lot of teachers don't appreciate quite what a skill they have, because they are surrounded by fellow teachers who also have that skill.

I’m not sure encouraging people out of the profession is the thing. Recruitment and retention is already so bad that Maths trainees are bring offered £30,000 just to train.

I know the Cabinet Office are doing a big study in retention. I would say attitudes like the OPs are a contributing factor.

This is how stressful teaching is:
21 years teaching
Complete breakdown
1 year curled up in a ball
Several more years sleeping most of every day
12 therapists - some useless, most ok, two pretty damned good, the last one was phenomenal
Not yet ready for any kind of full life and recovery time so far - five years.

Such a goady thread.

OP, your friend's view of her job is perfectly valid, and please stop comparing it to yours, it's not a competition, though you're working pretty hard to make it so.

www.theguardian.com/education/2019/feb/25/teachers-experience-more-stress-than-other-workers-study-shows

Oh, and welcome to MN.

@sanityisamyth I think it's a really flexible degree. I'm qualified nearly 20 years ago now 🤦‍♀️ and have been in lots of roles, but now I'm in GP practice which is probably my most favourite job so far, although it is definitely challenging!

I know lots of teachers,they've either left,are unhappy or are in the process of leaving teaching completely. Minimum 2 hrs marking every night and most of Sunday too. Teaching isn't what it used to be,the pressure is dire.

@summertime06 I literally can't wait!!! My course covers lots of different areas but I'm hoping I'll end up in a public facing job again and feel like I'm doing something worthwhile 🤞

OP!
Take 100 people a day.

They turn up 25 at a time and ALL want what they've come for RIGHT NOW. They alll expect you to do something for them.

You have 1 hr to deal with each group of 25. All 25 are with you for the full hour. They are not always calm or patient and they can be unpredictable.
Some of them arguing, some hyper because they stayed up until 2am and are knackered, some don't want to be there, some are sad, some need extra support and can't tell you what they want...

At the end of the hour you are expected to have dealt with each person individually, each person is has to leave with what they came for.

Honestly, it's crazy!

Teaching is stressful. My DH is a teacher as are most of my family. I could not do that job.

I am a solicitor, it can be horribly stressful. Nastily so.

There are a lot of teachers to say how stressful it is and so we tend to hear about it.

It's not a competition, lots of jobs are stressful.

BTW as a solicitor I get paid barely more FT than my teacher DH

And for those of you who find it soul destroying, are you planning to leave the profession?
Put it this way- I'm aiming to leave at 55. I get my pension at 73.

Teacher and parent here. I teach primary. I am in school 7.45am to 5pm every day. 5.30pm some days. 7.45-8.40: lesson prep
8.40-12 teaching plus playground duty.
12-12.15 eat a sandwich
12.15-1 mark 60 books from morning lessons
1-3.30 teach lessons
3.30-3.45 wait with children whose parents just can’t manage to pick them up on time....
3.45-5 mark afternoon lesson books and ones left over from the morning, meetings, phoning parents, organising trips, running a club, phoning social workers......
I then pick my children up from wrap around care, drive home, feed them, bathe them and put them to bed.
Then I get the laptop out and work 8.30-10.30 on planning, emails, assessments, SEND paperwork, safeguarding logs.....
I don’t work on Saturdays so today has been a great family day.
Tomorrow I will spent 3-4 hours planning lessons for the week ahead while I listen to my children playing in the other room.

This workload is relentless.

I have booked my children into holiday childcare for 3 days in the first and last weeks and 1 day per week in the middle weeks. So that I can go into school to sort out my classroom. Things like labelling books and displays seeing as we don’t have money for TAs anymore.

I really love teaching but the workload is insane. I had a different job before teaching and I never felt this exhausted - even with fewer holidays!!!

I don’t understand why it needs to be a competition. Your job is stressful. Her job is stressful. She’s decided to stop doing it for a while. Why does this bother you?

From friends of mine it sounds like you have to do loads of marking etc outside work hours with short turnaround times. Plus the pressure to do the best job for all the kids must be huge!

I'm sure there are more stressful jobs, but it definitely sounds pretty stressful to me

Yup. I'm going to another school in September on a fixed term contract and I'm using that time to look for something outside.

OP, I think we're seeing a common thread in many public sector public facing jobs, tbh. Anyone working in education, police or healthcare is finding themself so overstretched and challenged by unpredictable people that they're not sure if they can achieve the main aims of their job, effectively.

@WhiteDust I completely understand it's crazy, I'm really not trying to say it's not.

I get people turning up to my clinics high on drugs, if there's no security around I call the police. I've had patients go to the toilet to do a urine sample and have taken a drug overdose and collapsed. I've had someone take a heart attack in front of me and have had to use a defibrillator. I then go home and pick my 2 toddlers up from nursery, give them dinner and put them to bed. I just am trying to understand why teaching is so much more stressful than other jobs, this thread has been helpful so thanks to everyone who has replied.

Also, you mentioned your job in healthcare... I also know people (nurses) who have had to quit due to the stress.

People have different experiences and different limits, not every teaching job will be more stressful than every nursing job, and vice versa.

You take out the parents and half the number of children (at least.) The red tape and then I would say it must be a pretty good job.

Till that happens I would say it was a pretty stressful job.

I had 8 kids for a birthday party once and I have never been so stressed in all my life. I can't imagine that every day 5 days a week, plus all the other shit

Try imagining this:
You're on a stage in front of an audience.
You might not feel too well, or your life could be very stressful at the moment.
You know you have to perform. You know if you don't deliver what you should, you will be called out on it.
Even if you are feeling ok, you know that at least one of the members of the audience is likely to heckle you, but you still have to plough ahead anyway, and deal with that person at the same time.
Yes, security might be on backup, but it may well take them some time (if they arrive at all) to come and deal with the member of the audience.
You are expected to know about the differing needs of your audience and make allowances for them.
You need to adapt your performance as you go depending on the audience's reactions.
You haven't had time to go to the toilet because members of the previous audience need to be spoken to.
You don't have long between shows to clear the stage and set up for your next performance, so you have to rush your food.
You then have to review your general performance in meetings with the manager, and find things to improve for the next year.
Your manager will also watch you while you're working and draw conclusions which affect your pay.
You have to write reviews regularly for how well the audience understood your performance, what you need to change and how you plan to implement it.
If you're ill, you need to send instructions to your understudy to tell them exactly what to do, and the needs of your audience. You also need to contact your manger and tell them you won't be there and why. They will want to know all of the ins and outs of why you are off.

I could go on, but I think that's enough to give you an idea.

DP is a teacher, he teaches new entrants. There are 25 in his class and he doesn’t have a TA (we aren’t in the UK). Over the last year or so I have watched him just deteriorate as he struggles to keep up with the work. He works every evening and devotes hours over the weekend too.

I have convinced him to pack it in end of this year. It’s heartbreaking as there is a teacher shortage here and he is an amazing teacher and has loved it but he is starting to show mental and physical signs of stress.

summertime06 I think it’s a bit disappointing that when your friend tells you she feels burnt out and needs a break from her stressful job to concentrate on her family, your reaction is to ask people if teaching really is that stressful, and then go into detail about how your job is also stressful too. You don’t sound very supportive, perhaps that’s not your intention but it does somewhat sound that way.

Nobody is saying your job isn’t stressful too. All sorts of professions can be draining and high pressure. Someone taking a break from their role isn’t a reflection on your job or your life. If a colleague got signed off with stress you wouldn’t think the implication was that their role is harder than yours.

@summertime06 Imagine that you're seeing those patients every single day. At the same time And you have to watch and manage all of them even when dealing with things like the defibrillator and calling the police. And you have targets that have to be met while doing this. With your bathroom breaks being scheduled, even if you really need to go. Knowing full well that it's all going to happen again tomorrow with the exact same group of people. That's what's relentless about teaching. The challenges are a stressful as many of the stressful jobs, but at least other jobs are dealing with different people.