Smoking

[Amelia910]

So after hearing about the risk of SIDS and smoking I really don't want to allow smokers to hold my baby (currently 38 weeks pregnant) how do I go about telling people this without them being offended? AIBU?

Bit of context, my own mother is a heavy smoker, I also have several close friends who smoke.

Also I struggled with glue ear and tons of ear infections as a child and now reading about the effects of smoking I can't believe how selfish my mother was to smoke so much and probably caused these issues I had as a child :(

SIDS is very, very rare.
You could talk to your mother about your concerns and say you’d not want her smoking near the baby.

Smokers can hold the baby, they just need to wash their hands and change their top.

The SIDS risk is more about parents/primary carers, or people the baby is in contact with every day, than it is about your mum popping over once a week.

My dad smoked, my granny and aunt smoke like chimneys and I was around them growing up and suffered no ill effects.
Hiwveer upon researching myself I decided I didn't want DD around smoke anymore. Her dad, my other half and her step mum all smoke, dad and SM smoke in their flat and in the car when she isn't there but at 3 and a half, she has a constant cough. Dr has said it's probably the smoke. I can do absolutely nothing about her dad or SM smoking and I have begged OH to stop, it seems even the horrible coughing that makes her throw up at times doesn't do anything to deter them. I quit a while ago, because of her. My granny and aunt also disregard it as does my teenage (!) sister who smokes. Not to dissuade you there's no harm in asking but be prepared for people to be offended and refuse, it's an addiction at the end of the day.

My best friend is very strict about it and makes everyone rinse their mouth with mouthwash and wash their hands before holding her DD and asks they don't smoke for an hour before seeing her, but even then people tell her she's being silly

Thank you for replying. More than happy to be told AIBU as I was stressing over how to handle the situation!

think the advice is the smoker should rinse their mouth out with water, wash their hands and take off any outer layers (coats, heavy cardigans) that the smoke will be "attached" to, obviously don't smoke around the baby in enclosed spaces and don't have baby in a smoky environment ie don't put them in a room where smoking has previously taken place, if you follow (and make others follow) these precautions your baby should be fine, and no one should feel offended x

I would talk to your mum and explain the sids worry, I would be saying that she is welcome to come to your house but you won’t be taking your baby to hers and that she can’t smoke for 1 hour before holding the baby and needs to wash her hands and possibly change her top.

There is no evidence anywhere in the world of any cases of SIDS due to brief or indeed long term exposure to smokers without the presence of smoke.
It's merely anti smoking propaganda, very effective it is too going by this forum.

Anti smoking propaganda? Why, wouldn’t you be? Jeez and I say that as a smoker.

anti smoking propaganda

Having watched my father die a very slow, incredibly painful death from COPD caused by a lifetime of smoking, I’d say the world could do with a bit more anti-smoking “propaganda”.