Do children HAVE to do organised sports to stay healthy?

[Notcool1984]

I have to DC. DD is 6 and does quite a lot of activities. Three sports and a musical instrument.
My 9 yo DS however lacks confidence and has tried and given up a few things over the years but nothing sticks. He does a half hour swimming lesson and an instrument. He refuses point blank to do football / rugby / tennis / anything organised. He is very tall and is thin for his age. As a family we do loads, lots of walking / cycling / swimming / climbing wall but all (and I mean ALL) his friends do at least three other activities. He refuses, will cry and get stressed out at the idea.
I’m just wondering if anyone has older DS who have managed to stay fit and healthy without taking part in organised club sports?

Children have to be active to be healthy, but that doesn't mean organised or group activities. They are a comparatively recent phenonemen, and children used to naturally get the activity they needed through general play and transporting themselves around.

You can often find that children do little else other than organised activities and actually don't do enough to be healthy!

It sounds like he has a good balance already.

No. A lot of children hate, loathe organised sport. I dont see why its mandatory TBH, something more fun like dance classes or yoga would be more beneficial, or golf even.

I had one who was very very sporty, if it moves, has a bat or ball, he'll play it. The other two were out all the time on their bikes. Why do you think they would be less healthy?

They won't be healthy if their MH is wrecked by stress and they are generally miserable about being forced into stuff they do not like.

Sounds like he has yet to find sports he likes.

Yes, I think it's important to be active - doesn't have to be organised sport, but does need to be something that you are really doing (IYSWIM, as it's all to easy to kid yourself you are doing more than you really are if you don't have an imposed external structure)

Make sure he has exposure to plenty of sports (perhaps during holidays), try to get him along to something like Junior Parkrun (which is active but not remotely competitive, it's all about community and participation).

One of my DC did not find a sporting passion until the early teen years, at which point they started training seriously 2-3 times a week plus strength/conditioning sessione.

So yes, it can happen later. But I think your main focus right now should be on combating resistance before it becomes entrenched. So don't try to send him back to a sport he's tried but doesn't like at the moment. Do try new things.

And find out what non-sport things he wants to do too, and make sure he gets extra-curricular opportunities for those too.

You say he's active within regular family activities, walking etc... It's really no big deal that organised sports aren't his thing.

I'm a part time teacher (KS2 now, but used to be KS1), and LOADS of kids aren't part of any teams or do anything beyond the odd swimming lesson. It's fine. As long as he's not overweight, and appears healthy, you've got nothing to worry about.

Have you actually asked him if there's a club he'd like to join? Does the school run any clubs? They tend to be a bit more low-key and casual, as it's usually just teachers running them, and they're less pressure for shyer kids than the paid for clubs out of school.

But perhaps sports just aren't his thing, and that's totally okay. If he wants to join nothing, that's okay. But would he be interested in something like a choir, a drama club, art, a Saturday music school?

No. All the organised stuff is relatively recent. Children need exercise.I suspect the focus on organised activity reduces fitness overall as people say their children go to, say, football and swimming and assume that’s enough. That might just be two hours exercise a week with the rest of the time spent in cars. There was a recent thread where many said a 45 minute walk was too far for a five or six year old.

Far more important than planned exercise is the exercise that is part of everyday life. Incidental exercise. Walking or cycling instead of using cars, chores rather house or helping in the garden, dog walking, going to the beach rather than have a pub lunch, going to the woods to climb trees rather than the cinema, swimming for fun rather than lessons.

Exercise isn’t just about being a healthy weight. You can be quite skinny and still unhealthy due to lack of exercise. Lack of exercise in children leads to long term health risks.

No.

Exercise is essential, whether it’s organised sports or done elsewhere doesn’t matter.

It doesn't have to be 'organised' team sports at all! But perhaps you can take up something individual for him? He might be a bit young to do running, but there are things like mud runs, or walks supporting charities which he might like to do, and it feels like a 'group' activity without it actually being a group activity.

Not at all.

My DD sounds similar, and loves ice skating which we started before Christmas. HUGE success.

If you have a rink near you they will offer the NISA learn to skate program which is weekly group lessons towards highly visible and achievable targets, which gamifies for the children really well - they're always dying to know what their percentages are every week.

And boys are in short supply! The teachers will be thrilled!

Indoor rock climbing is another brilliant one for kids as their strength/weight ratio means they can achieve a LOT more than adult beginners, which is very gratifying for them.

I’ve got teenage boys and I find it helpful that they’re involved in a team sport otherwise I would really be struggling to get them to be active. I am depressed by their lack of motivation to do anything else.

But they’ve gone thro a few sports before sticking to the one they like. I think there’s a lot out there that isn’t football

Straight answer is no. We are a very active family, lots of (dog) walking, cycling and hiking holidays. We all love doing outside activities. Most are not organized. My DC are fit and healthy & there is no need for them to do overpriced activities in a stuffy indoor hall.
Obviously if your DC enjoy a particular sport, you should support them, but not force them.

I was forced to do every kind of ball sport as a kid and as a result, I HATED every form of athletics and just felt like sh*t as my visual perception isn't great. Now, as an adult, I have realized I don't need to be part of a team to be healthy. I currently lift weights, do YouTube exercise videos, commute by walking or cycling, play golf, swim lengths really badly and do yoga. Sports isn't limited to clubs. It will get easier once he is big enough to take himself to the pool or gym.

This is all so reassuring!! I do worry if he doesn’t have hobbies as a teenager. I did athletics and sport as a subject in school and it did wonders for my health and mental health too.

My oldest isn't a "team" player and does better with solo activities such as swimming, karate and running. He has dyspraxia and gets overwhelmed by the multitasking of teams; running, kicking, anticipating, communicating.

With two DCs with awkwardly timed swimming lessons at a very busy centre, our swimming night consumes 3 hours including travel. That achieves a 30 minute lesson each (more like 15-20 mins of activity) plus a splash session to break the time up. It's very easy to overestimate the value of the activity done! The benefit is in gaining the skill long term, not that it gets them fit in itself.

I find it easier in the holidays as I can take them swimming and for walks etc, cycling, climbing centre. During term time he spends a lot of evenings sort of mooching about.

I have just bought a book called "you are awesome" by Matthew Syed to improve my childs confidence, it is brilliant. Aimed at that sort of age.

My ds is 13 and has never done organised stuff out of school. However, he cycles with us (mountain and road, will do 50 miles on the road), swims for fun (in pool or lake with me), runs (enjoys this less, but comes for a 5k or parkrun), goes to the gym, and likes to kayak/SUP when able.
I'm much more bothered that he does things that he can continue through his life, and that we spend time doing together

As long as he's doing plenty of exercise then of course he doesn't have to. Mine all loved team sports and the social side of it helped them to stay active, but if he hates it then there's no point pushing it.

No he doesnt. There are loads solo stuff. What about bmx riding at local track? Or going climbing once a week.

Thanks all! He does like the skate park and climbing centre, swimming etc. It’s hard as his friends all do footie and rugby at the weekends and tennis etc, I worry he is missing out on social side too but he point blank refuses to go so I can’t really force it!

Not at all ! He is healthy and slim and exercises

I have learnt that pushing them to do stuff that’s not their bag ends in tears

Sound like you have nothing to worry about