AIBU to think nice people are just walked all over?

[Namechange365]

So backstory

I was made redundant from my job of 8 years 10 months ago. I loved my job, the people were lovely but there were mass layoffs.

Anyway I started a new job six months ago, made an effort to be friendly but the atmosphere was pretty toxic and cliquey. I tried not to let it bother me and got on with my work but it wasn’t the nicest. they were the same with the other new girl.

Anyway fast forward three months later (so three months ago) I had a lot of personal problems. I had a stalker trying to illegally access my address, trying to use his contacts to find out my personal details. It was a nightmare and it changed who I was. I became really stressed out and snappy. I wasn’t the nicest person to be around be around. I definitely tried not letting it effect my work but it did make me a more angry stressed person, which is out of character for me.

Suddenly overnight these girls who were trying to get me in trouble at work, ignored me, are now wanting to be my friends. They text me, are constantly inviting me on their nights out, bitching about each other to me. I’m sorry but WTF. I become the bitch from hell for a few weeks and now because of that they suddenly “respect me”? They’re still nasty to the other new girl. And no I won’t be being friends with them outside of work.

I’m just confused. Is the cliche that nice people are trampled on true?

That’s interesting. I think they have discovered you have ‘fight back’ and prob want to cover themselves in case you report them.

There definitely are many people who mistake kindness for weakness. I tend to reassure myself that I know that I'm not a wimp, so if others think I am, that's their problem. Especially if they piss me off enough to find out for themselves.

Nice doesn’t really exist, it’s a catch all for more specific qualities eg good listener, reliable, generous, honest and so on.

You can be all these things and not a mug.

I become the bitch from hell for a few weeks and now because of that they suddenly “respect me”
I absolutely, wholeheartedly and passionately hate people like that. Typical animal behaviour. You show the teeth - and they stick their tail between their legs, after having pissed all over you for not doing it sooner.

Well done for showing them. You are inspirational.