Bil and Sil have been staying with us for a few days, we live abroad and only see them maybe twice a year.
They don't have kids, we have an 18 month old.
I don't know if I'm being unreasonable as I've been dreading the visit anyway. Bil and Sil are very uptight, they like things their way on their time scale, don't really do 'down time' and are very focused on ticking tourist boxes. The complete opposite to how we operate as a family.
They are visiting us as part of a longer holiday in our country which is absolutely fine but they are making no allowance for our son. They have literally bounced from one tourist thing to another taking a few pictures in each one then left. We've had to push them to stop for food etc (they brought their own snac bars). Ds will be sobbing and we will be telling them we need to go somewhere for food and they will still pop into every shop etc. but also act really funny with us if we offer to go wait for them in a coffee shop.
Annoying but not a major problem.
Then they are being really crappy with my son, shouting at him for doing things we've told him are OK. For example me and ds were playing with some toys by tipping them onto the floor and counting them back in to the box, bil came out from another room shouting at my ds that he was naughty for chucking his toys around. They have told him off or told him that he's naughty at least 5 times per day over the 2 days they have been here. He is not naughty but has been a bit whiny because his routine has been completely upended!
They told me I was 'rewarding his bad behaviour' because ds was throwing a tantrum (tired, overwhelmed and thirsty/hungry) so I settled him down for a breast feed. I then got the silent treatment when I said I didn't agree with them.
I feel bil is being mean to ds, deliberately scaring him then laughing about it, offering him things (like a biscuit) then saying 'no it's not for you' and eating it in front of him, that kind of thing.
Then bil has made loads of comments along the lines of 'ds is a perfect example of why not to have kids' and 'why would you want a second when they are nothing but hard work' and how normal playing noise is 'an unpleasant environment'. I get that I'm biased but ds is a beautiful, funny and joyful toddler who loves people and sharing but, admittedly, has some normal 18 month old tantrums over food and drink, tiredness and (occasionally) being forced to do something he doesn't want. Most of the time he is happy to go with the flow.
So far I have been biting my tongue (mostly) because they are only here for a couple of days and the relationship is really important to my dp.
But last night I could see them through the crack in the door where I was playing with ds and they were whispering about us and our parenting and generally being really judgy and rude so I've reached the end of my tether. They were due to leave this morning anyway and I've told my dp they won't be welcome in my house again. I don't think dp is in agreement so I just wanted some opinions on whether or not you would find this acceptable.
As back ground, they are from a medical background and are, to put it politely, disparaging over dps medical issues (making comments such as 'what's wrong with him now' and rolling their eyes at each other). They have also critiqued every single meal I've made them and not thanked me once.
I guess I'm just a bit fed up!