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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Re DH and smoke in kitchen

16 replies

nutbrownhare15 · 02/07/2019 10:12

This happened last night but we had another argument about it this morning. DH making biscuits with older child in kitchen, me changing baby's nappy in lounge. Smoke alarm goes off. I go through and stand under it, he comes in and says 'you need to flap under it' (I hadn't had time to react). He flaps and it goes off. I ask where smoke from and he says ' the oven's been on too long, I told DD we need to hurry up making the biscuits'. This doesn't sound right to me as oven shouldn't be smoking with nothing in it. I go through and he starts saying 'shut that door, I need you and DD out of here'. I go to oven instead to see what's smoking. I turn it off and open door. He's then there and tells me to go out if room with dd. He takes tray out and puts it in garden. I go through into lounge with dd. But it's still smoky in kitchen so I go back into it, opens okay oven and take out second test and put in garden. He's still telling me to go into lounge, stopped coming back through because of smoke. We all go through into lounge, he's annoyed that I haven't listened to him and stayed in lounge. He goes back into kitchen and mentions biscuits being nearly ready. I go through into kitchen again and oven is on!I say no biscuits as too smoky. He says he accidentally put oven on. Nub of argument this morning, he things he had things handled as he was in kitchen first and wanted to keep me, DD and baby safe from smoke in lounge. He's annoyed that I didn't 'follow his instructions'. I think my priority was to stop the smoke and then get everyone out. While his was to get everyone out then stop smoke. Neither necessarily wrong. But he's annoyed. Wibu?

OP posts:
nutbrownhare15 · 02/07/2019 10:13

Second 'tray' (both had oil on it turned out)

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 02/07/2019 10:15

I would chalk this one up to “does it really matter”?

araiwa · 02/07/2019 10:17
Biscuit
hazell42 · 02/07/2019 10:18

Why did you keep going back in the kitchen?
Could you not trust him to deal with a bit of smoke?
Unless the kitchen was on fire you were being a bit ott controlling.
I'd have let him get on with it and then ate the biscuits.
Smoke alarms can go off all the time. If you've checked and you know the cause there is no need to flap about it

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 02/07/2019 10:19

If I was trying to cook and had someone coming in and out checking on what I was doing, switching the oven off etc, it would drive me bonkers.

And yes, I often set the smoke alarm off when the oven gets too hot. (I really need to clean the oven!).

I think YABU.

Lazypuppy · 02/07/2019 10:20

YABU why couldn't you just stay in the lounge?!

trackingmedown · 02/07/2019 10:21

Op you say neither of you was (necessarily) wrong and yet you are still annoyed with him. Given that you can see his approach was a valid one what is it that is annoying you about the situation? Is it that you like things done your way or does he have a habit of ignoring your opinions?

Omzlas · 02/07/2019 10:49

You were hovering and trying to interfere

If you don't trust him using the oven.....?

He was trying to keep you from choking on smoke, I'm in camp husband.

Rezie · 02/07/2019 10:59

When I have things under control it is very annoying when someone else comes in and mess it up. Obviously if his way if handling it was dangerous etc. Then it's ok to come in and take over.

Alienspaceship · 02/07/2019 11:01

You sound very annoying!!! If I was him I would have been highly irritated. Couldn’t you just leave him to sort it out?

Jemima232 · 02/07/2019 11:04

I can't make head nor tail of your OP.

Mrsjayy · 02/07/2019 11:05

God that sounds annoying why didn't you leave him to flap under the smoke alarm and sort it out? Sometimes a spill in the oven causes it to smoke calm down!

Mrsjayy · 02/07/2019 11:06

Yes oily trays will smoke Confused

Ratbagratty · 02/07/2019 11:08

You should have taken baby outside, DH turn off oven and take daughter outside safely. Then and only then should one of you have re entered the house to sort out the oven and get rid of smoke. So you both panicked and you now need to get a plan for your family for the future.

PurpleDaisies · 02/07/2019 11:14

So you both panicked and you now need to get a plan for your family for the future.

You need a plan for an oily baking tray smoking a bit?!

nutbrownhare15 · 02/07/2019 11:37

Fair enough! Will try to give him more credit in future. We've made up now. Thanks for all the comments, it helps to get an alternative perspective on things.

OP posts:
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