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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Unsociable dog and no warning

48 replies

MonkeyTrap · 01/07/2019 12:45

I’m quite irritated by an incident I had this morning, I realise it’s pretty insignificant in the grand scheme so have come here to rant and save peoples ears IRL.

Walking my dog with my baby in the pram and leaving the park down a path (probably 5 metres wide), I spot a teenage girl (17/18) approaching behind me walking her collie on a lead. My dog is off lead, so I looked at her directly and gather my dogs lead ready to clip him on if necessary, I asked “is he ok?” looking at her dog. She ignores me. I realise she has headphones in. She continues to approach me. I assume by her lack of response and nonchalant attitude that her dog is ok.

I turned my head to look at my baby who is crying and being fussy, at which point her dog lunges at mine as it passes. My dog yelps, then pulls away. I clipped my dog on pretty quickly and said that “some warning might have been nice, I did ask” and she just continued to ignore me.

I totally respect that some dogs need space and have had a reactive dog before, but I also think if you have a reactive/aggressive dog you should engage with fellow dog walkers to warn them. She was walking faster than me and would no doubt have just come up behind with no warning had I not have clocked her.

OP posts:
AryaStarkWolf · 01/07/2019 12:51

meh he was on a lead, yours should have been aswell, dogs will be dogs

MonkeyTrap · 01/07/2019 12:54

Mine should have been under close control, which he was. If mine had been on a lead I don’t think it would have necessarily prevented it because the distance was so small between us.

OP posts:
Bluebell878275 · 01/07/2019 12:55

I walk mine off the lead in general but if someone was coming up to me with their dog on the lead I would clip the lead on too. Better to be safe than sorry.

Lolwhat · 01/07/2019 12:57

I always clip the lead on if another dog approaches, my dog is the friendliest dog ever. She had her dog on the lead, yours wasn’t🤷🏼‍♀️

Monsterdogs · 01/07/2019 13:00

You were unreasonable to have an off lead dog around an on lead dog. It's good dog owning manners and will help your own liability should an altercation between dogs result in an injury to any party. But the other owner should have not walked so close to another dog if hers has issues. That must have been scary for your own dog. I would recommend that for the next few weeks, whenever you see another dog, especially a collie, you dont walk too close to them and give your dog plenty of treats just after your dog notices the other dog. This should prevent your own dog making an association that dogs walking towards them is scary and stop your own dog from becoming reactive. :-)

woodlock75 · 01/07/2019 13:03

Your dog should have been on a lead. As soon as I see another dog at the park (that I don't know) my dog goes straight on his lead. Prevents stuff like this happening - dogs are unpredictable and your dog being off the lead would have meant if anything happened you would have been at fault.

MonkeyTrap · 01/07/2019 13:04

Thanks Monsterdogs.
The issue here was that she approached me and didn’t forewarn me.
My own dog was at my heel ready to be clipped on, but given the owner didn’t create any distance with her own dog whether or not mine was on a lead wouldn’t have prevented hers reaching mine.

Thanks for the comments. I don’t agree that having a dog on lead devolves you of responsibility to try and pass another safely, and leads alone do not solve the issue of distance. But i did ask on AIBU Wink

OP posts:
VampirateQueen · 01/07/2019 13:12

Ok did the girl make any attempt to reign her dog in?
I had a reactive dog once (she didn't like people and the only dog she didn't like we're labs because she had been attacked by one) even if on a lead I would pull her in to me so I had full control of her as I passed by anybody. Just because a reactive dog is on a lead doesn't absolve you if they hurt anyone.
Also wether or not your dog was on a lead has no bearing on this, as your dog was at your heal, where it would have been on a lead anyway, the only way your doing not being on a lead would make it your responsibility is if it ran up to the other dog imo.

Monsterdogs · 01/07/2019 13:15

Youre right OP, having your dog on lead is not responsible enough if your dog is reactive. There are coloured and fluorescent leads, harnesses, etc that can let others know how your dog is likely to react. If you feel strongly that other owners should be more responsible, channel the energy and write to your MP, get involved with charities that promote good dog ownership or something like that. Not much else you can do about the ignorant owner now.

Beesandcheese · 01/07/2019 13:18

I am unsure why dog owners get so confused. Put them on leads on public land/ or in streets. Particularly when you are distracted by your baby etc needing some attention.

Yabbers · 01/07/2019 13:23

Keep your dog on a lead.

Wolfiefan · 01/07/2019 13:30

Surely the fact her dog was on a lead was a warning. No off lead dog should approach an on lead one.

Whathappenedtooursummer · 01/07/2019 13:38

My dh had ddog out last night. Off lead. Saw 2 women +mahoosive Akita off lead.. He clipped ddog on. Kept walking to the steps off the beach. Mahoosive ddog approached ours who bared teeth! Dh asked the women to please get the ddog...
Apparently they didn't see them...
A 40 kg ddog and a 6'4 dh....
I asked dh could it have been a bloody guide Akita??
Bonkers.

In her defense maybe her ddog didn't like the pram? Mine has a phobia of wheels.
Encountered ds's buggy a few times....
Oops!!

FriarTuck · 01/07/2019 13:45

Why have you mentioned several times about her lack of response when you've commented that she had headphones on? She's not ignoring you, she hasn't heard you! And like everyone else says - if a dog on a lead is approaching then put yours on too. Yes she should have kept more distance from you but unless your dog is the type to give another dog a wide berth then you need the lead on.

Zaphodsotherhead · 01/07/2019 13:48

My dog is an utter horror so is always on the lead when other people or dogs are around, but I'm surprised by how many people let their off-lead dogs approach us when we're out. I usually shout out a warning to them, and most will fetch their dogs back, but there have been one or two 'moments' when I've had to practically sit on my dog to stop her lunging and snarling. Terriers can be evil buggers.

But yes, dogs on leads are often very territorial and will lunge at other dogs, even if they are nice as pie in other circumstances. Teenager may have been reluctantly walking the family dog and not really 'aware' of what was going on around her. But her dog was on the lead, short of clutching it to her chest or take a huge detour around you, there wasn't much else she could do.

LegionOfDoom · 01/07/2019 13:53

I don’t agree that having a dog on lead devolves you of responsibility to try and pass another safely, and leads alone do not solve the issue of distance

Entirely your fault. The girl had her dog on a lead, and your off lead dog approached it, so it reacted. You’re just lucky it wasn’t worse than what it was. The girl was not at fault in any way. Your dog approached hers.

Instead of being defensive, just remember this was a close call and in future keep your dog on a lead when you see another dog. Especially as you have your baby with you. If that other dog had really gone for your dog, what could you have really done?

TheInebriati · 01/07/2019 13:55

I think people have misunderstood and assume that because your dog was off lead he was out of control and approached her dog.

Whereas her dog was on lead but not under control and approached you and your dog.
Being on lead is irrelevant if the lead is 6 feet long and the owner is asleep.

User24689 · 01/07/2019 13:59

I think YABU. Dogs are unpredictable, even ones that are 'very friendly'.

My dog is also very friendly, but will 'lunge' at other dogs if they approach him when he is on the lead. This is entirely normal dog behaviour, especially in certain breeds. They know they are in a position of less power on the lead and cannot escape so they are much more likely to show aggression in order to get the other dog to back away from them.

I would never let my loose dog approach another on a lead. Basic dog walking manners. Sorry but you did ask in AIBU!

LizzieMacQueen · 01/07/2019 14:01

It's summer holidays around here; I'd assume it is some local teenager that doesn't know the dog that well.

I double checked the details in case It was one of my teenagers; it's not.

Nesssie · 01/07/2019 14:01

GUYS READ THE OP. Her dog didn't approach the other dog. Her dog was walking to heel.
If her dog had approached the on lead dog, then yes YABU but otherwise YANBU.

My dog is lead reactive and I always tell other owners so they can keep their dog close/put on a lead if necessary.

User24689 · 01/07/2019 14:06

Perhaps Nesssie but it's really just one of those things. It's dogs being dogs. Many dogs can occasionally act this way on the lead, whether they are 'lead reactive' or not. Her dog wasnt hurt. I wouldn't have given this interaction a second thought to be honest, certainly wouldn't have snarked at the teenager.

GhostHoward · 01/07/2019 14:08

Generally I'd say that the OP's dog should have been on a lead, but it seems from both her OP and follow up post, that her dog had come back to her and was sat closer than many on lead dogs would have been, and didn't try to greet the lunging dog.

If the pavement was 5m wide, then headphones or none, the other dog walker should have bypassed the OP and her dog, who was disinterested in the dog on the lead.

I always call my dogs to me when I see another dog (on lead of off) and mostly will put them on the lead, but occasionally will just hold their collar until the other dog has passed. The important thing is that you remove your dog from free ranging with unknown dogs and have them under control. OP's dog was ignoring the collie (who came into it's space unnecessarily, given the wide path) so OP wasn't in the wrong this time.

Nesssie · 01/07/2019 14:10

@upthewolves Its not really 'dogs being dogs'. The only reason the dog didn't make contact was because of the lead.
I'm sure if a dog had lunged at your dog out of nowhere, you would have given it another thought Hmm

User24689 · 01/07/2019 14:15

The only reason the dog didn't make contact was because of the lead? So... whats the issue? It was on its lead, so no harm came to the OPs dog? Perhaps I'm visualising this interaction differently in my head.

This morning, my dog approached another off lead dog in the park. The other dog randomly snapped at him with no warning. They scuffled, then turned and went their separate ways. The other dog owner apologised, I said no worries, we chatted about the weather and that was that. They're animals!

Wolfiefan · 01/07/2019 14:16

By law a dog on lead is deemed under control. An off lead dog shouldn’t be getting close enough to be snapped at.

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