To help me understand why I feel relieved but upset? Breakup

[ReliefManc]

I just broke up with my DP of 3 years. The reason for the split is that I always feel like I come second to everything else. We see each other 3-5 times a week, and when we’re together he makes me so happy but when we’re apart that’s when things change. He’s always ‘busy’, always cancelling plans last minute etc. Last week we were suppose to meet up after work, he cancelled on me last minute because he had to pick up his mate and drop him home. His mate could have taken the bus or called a cab, but no he had to cancel. It was the last straw for me, I was just fed up of always coming second to everything and everyone else in his life.

I’m naturally upset and have been crying a lot, but I also feel relieved in a weird way. I really loved him and wanted to be with him. Has anyone felt this way before?

In a way I'm looking forward for the future and being single again, but I'm also crying. It's so weird

It’s completely normal - you’ve done the right thing but it’s still natural to be upset about the end of a relationship with someone who you loved.

Sounds totally normal OP! Breakups are hard, and the cause of a lot of mixed emotions. You’re relieved to be free of someone who didn’t prioritise you, but you’re also sad at the loss of what you could have been if he had been the person you wanted him to be.

Give yourself time to move on