AIBU to feel so torn over whether to have a second baby? I can't put the idea out my mind but I don't know if I actually WANT another child. My partners on board either way. Ds1 is at school now. I'm early 40s. With ds1 I had such an overwhelming desire to have a child and he's everything I could have hoped for but I'm really struggling with the decision over whether to have another. I get so upset to think of ds1 all alone one day in the world.