To call DH & my bedroom 'my room'

[Justajot]

When referring to our bedroom, but talking to DD, I tend to say 'my room'. DH thinks this is odd and I should be saying 'our room'. But I think 'our room' makes it sound like DD and I share a room. Who is right?

It is odd to care. I use those interchangeably. Just say "the room of your mother and father" from now on.

I always say mummy and daddy's room but I don't think it matters at all.

I guess ‘my room’ does sort of imply that it’s your room mainly and your husband isn’t really involved

I call our bedroom my bedroom and the guest bedroom DH's bedroom because all of his clothes are in the wardrobes in there and the wardrobes in our bedroom are filled with my stuff. It's not odd, I don't think.

I do the same.. Only elaborate in terms of "look in your dad's wardrobe/under dad's side of the bed.."

Yawn!

Your DH is right. You are not wrong though in thinking your DD may be confused by its ambiguity. Just say 'Mummy and Daddy's room'.
...and they all lived happily ever after.

Saying "our room" to dd would be confusing.
If you said "my room" to dh he might have a point but even that isn't a big deal to me or my dh.

Tell your dd to refer all further requests to her father.

Jesus, how insecure does a grown man have to be to pick up on that? I’d start calling it “your father and mother’s room that they share together. The one that they both sleep and get dressed and undressed in.”

Some languages distinguish between we/our (including the person you're speaking to) and we/our (excluding the person you're speaking to). English doesn't make that distinction so we just have to use whichever word makes sense in the context.

I think "my room" makes sense when you're talking to dd, who doesn't share that room with you. In much the same way as I would say "my daughter" or "my house" when talking to friends/colleagues who aren't part of my family. Technically, she is "our daughter" because DH is also her parent, and the house is "our house" because it is in joint names, but that is of no relevance to those who have no share in the situation.

It's a pretty trivial thing to focus on, either way!

I refer to it as our room if talking to DH but my room if talking to anyone else.

Like I would say my house/car/kids etc

I call it 'me and Daddy's room', but I don't see what your husband's problem is really unless you have form for 'claiming' joint things as yours.

I’m the same, it is my room so I don’t see why I wouldn’t call it that. Is he always so specific?

He's a bit of a pedant. Glad I'm not universally considered to be wrong - thanks.

I do say our room, but I only know this because I just asked dd1 to fetch something from our room. (I should probably add I have a broken knee and can only haul myself upstairs on my backside once a day before the child slavery brigade take me away in chains )

Whether "my" or "our" is correct depends on the context.

"I dry my hair in our room" is the only option if speaking to you husband. If speaking to someone else in a context that doesn't include him, for example because he's not present and participating in the conversation, you would say "my". If he is in some sense present and part of the conversation, it might make sense to refer to "our" room, but it would depend exactly on the context.

So, given he was present for the conversation, I think we need a detailed account of who said what in the run-up to the contested utterance, before we can decide.

Another example, if speaking to DD after a family shopping trip, as she was about to go upstairs:-

"DD, please put my new shoes in our room" would sound weird, even if DH is present. Should be "my room."

""DD, please put DH new shoes in my room", would sound weird, should be "our room".

several

I had a similar discussion with my friend who picked up on me calling it ‘My wedding’ and he said don’t you mean ‘our’ wedding (I think he was inferring I was a attention grabbing 😂😂😂

When I was talking to DH I would say ‘our’ but it didn’t make sense when talking to someone else.

I’m with you OP for what it’s worth

*attention grabbing bridezilla