AIBU to not go to this party?

[LastMinuteInvitation]

A friend just announced today that she's throwing a surprise party for her partners 40th with one week's notice. The party is the same day that I'm going to a concert(everything is booked in advance, and the ticket was purchased last year so I won't be able to go. She's not happy. She knew of the concert and I barely know her partner. I like her of course but we only see each other every second month or so. Another friend won't be able to attend because she has a wedding to attend.

Friend has form for last minute invitations and to be fair I've had my concert booked since last year and I wouldn't expect her to take that into account but AIBU to think that if you announce an event at such short notice that it isn't surprising if people can't make it?

Yanbu.

Friend is probably stressed about party and disappointed you cant come. Go and enjoy your concert if she isn't normally high maintenance she will be back to normal next week.

Of course you don't have to go. Even with a lot more notice, some people will have prior engagements. With a week's notice, I'd be expecting no more than half the people invited to be there.

Totally up to you if you go or not but she's not being unreasonable to invite you. So nobody is being unreasonable.

It isn't the invitation that's the issue. It's the guilt tripping.

She should expect low attendance if only giving a weeks notice.
I doubt any of my friends would be able to attend a party at mine if I just suddenly decided now to have one next Friday.
People make plans in advance and she should have considered that.

Yadnbu

Well it's next Saturday but still just over the week which is practically no notice.

She's generally a very spontaneous person and I envy her that, but I am decidedly not.

Just ignore the guilt tripping. She knew about the concert and can't expect you to simply drop the money you ve spent and go to a party for someone you barely know.

You're not available, you're already busy that night going to a concert. There's no need to feel guilty that you have a life & have plans! No one should expect you to sit at home every weekend just incase one of those weekends a friend might invite you at last minute to something random.
Absolutely no need to feel any guilt that you are living your life. It's bizarre.

Did her DP forget they were 40 and just suddenly realised "Hmmm now why is that date significant................... oh yes "

As a general rule I don’t change plans. If you arrange last minute you accept that many people won’t be able to attend. Enjoy your concert. Tell your friend it’s a shame it’s on that day but you’ll catch up with her soon. End of.

It's completely unreasonable for her to guilt trip you.

She doesn't sound like a very good friend.

I don't go out very often so perhaps she's just shocked that I actually have plans for once!

She's very nice and I enjoy her company but she's someone who'll accept two invitations on the one night and decide which she feels like going to last minute, or indeed find a third so I'm not sure she has any real right to complain but she is. Hopefully she'll get over it soon.

She’s probably annoyed because due to her spontaneity disorganisation hardly anyone is actually available to celebrate her DP’s birthday and it’s going to be a bit of a sad evening.

Go to your concert, have a great night and ignore your ‘friend’ if she’s trying to guilt trip you.

She’s being a silly cow. Ignore.

Are you off to see Stevie Wonder by any chance OP? Definitely can't miss that it so?

Not Stevie Wonder.(I didn't even know that he was touring. My Mother would have loved that)

I always feel short notice means the host doesn't really want the invitee to attend. It appears from your friend's reaction that this may not always be the case. I received an invite 2 days ago for a party today. I declined the invitation. I already had plans and the timings clashed but I will still have said No even if I didn't.

YADNBU. Go enjoy your concert.

Thank you all for the responses.