Alcoholism or normal?

[ImAwfulWithUsernames]

Currently debating this at work.

My OH enjoys 1-2 drinks a night (usually a rum & coke) but they don't make him tipsy or drunk, he just likes the taste.

Myself, I usually will drink half to a whole bottle of wine once a week (in one night)

I've grown up around alcohol so having a glass of wine with dinner is completely normal to me... but some people are convinced this makes you an alcoholic.

Thoughts?

No that is not Alcoholism,I am a sober Alcoholic,over 16 years.

You can’t make yourself an Alcoholic.

happymummy,you are clearly drinking way way to much,the fact Alcohol doesn’t affect you is a red flag,you can get sudden liver failure,with no prior warning at all,you are also at big risk of a heart attack or stroke.

Your drinking sounds like mine before it escalated to full blown Alcoholism.

Some people dont understand that a few drinks to wind down after work and a dependency where alcohol rules everything are opposite ends of the spectrum

No they're not.

Feeling the need to drink to wind down after work is a pointer to dependency and that is on the same side of the same spectrum.
Tee total would be the opposite side of the spectrum.

Tee total-special occasion only drinker-occasional night out drinker-every Friday night drinker-nightly to unwind drinker--drink dependent.

@happymummy12345 - I drink because I enjoy it, and I don't get affected in any way by it, so I will continue to do so.

My father drank every day and was ‘not affected by it’. He often packed away half a bottle of red, a couple of large G &T’s and several glasses of whisky, and did not act or appear drunk.

He was told his liver enzymes were raised and he should stop drinking - so he did, for six months. Never had withdrawal symptoms or anything. My mother said that means he wasn’t an alcoholic.

Then another consultant told him he could drink as long as he didn’t overdo it. He started drinking again and was dead inside 3 years from complications of alcohol related liver disease. Still not looking or acting drunk.

It doesn’t really matter whether he was ‘an alcoholic’ or not. He’s dead either way.

Alcoholism is excessive dependence on alcohol that leads to health (mental and/or physical) complications.

So...

• Can you avoid alcohol altogether? What would happen if you had to go for six months without any? Do you ever depend on alcohol to relax? (If you would struggle then that indicates dependence).

• A whole bottle of wine in a single night is very likely to have health consequences (that's 8.5-10.5 units of alcohol), given that the total intake should be no more than 14 units and that you're supposed to spread that out over 2-3 nights/week. Health consequences from booze include liver cirrhosis, cancers, certain heart conditions, Alzheimer's. For your OH he should be having 1-2 nights booze free each week.

British society is very accepting of excessive alcohol consumption but the health consequences are very real and it's best to at least stick to the NHS advice.

It only makes you an alcoholic if you can't do without, so, if on one of your drinking nights, something gets in the way, does it bother you/him? If not, don't worry about it. I agree that a whole bottle of wine at one go is a lot and people need not to drink alcohol every day, but if there is flexibility in your routine, I wouldn't worry.

happymummy12345 Tue 25-Jun-19 15:36:24
I drink every day, I can easily drink a whole bottle of wine and I don't even feel tipsy.

I don't drink to get drunk I drink to enjoy myself and relax. Equally not drinking would never bother me, which is why I know it's not a problem at all.

^ As the daughter of an alcoholic this is horrifying to read. A whole bottle a night WILL lead to you dying early from a preventable disease.

I think the contemporary tendency to moral panic about drinking and to insist that everything (barring the MN single glass of Prosecco at Christmas or to toast a wedding) is an alcohol problem is unhelpful and potentially dangerous.

It trivializes actual alcoholism. And it discourages people who don’t have an issue with dependency but could do with cutting down from doing so. The fact is that health advice that catastrophizes doesn’t work.

If you could go days or weeks on end without alcohol, then not. The alcoholics I have known struggle to get through the day without alcohol.

Crustaceans Yes, I agree.

I also think some people who don't enjoy a drink at all tend to be very judgemental. I like a drink but eat really healthy, don't smoke and exercise.

Needing to drink half a bottle of wine every night would indicate a problem, if he can't manage without the rum and cokes ditto but if you can have 2-3 alcohol free days a week, no more than 14 units in a week and never put alcohol above other things then you don't have a problem. Just as a side note, if you find you can't leave an open bottle of wine eg you feel you must finish it then even if you aren't dependent it indicates a possibly worsening relationship with alcohol so make sure you have a wine stopper so no excuse not to leave until the next day or two

You're not alcoholics! Mumsnet is sooo judgy about alcohol but I don't think half a bottle of wine is a lot in one go! Not once a week!

I think both of those sound fine. It lots of cultures, it’s normal to have a drink or two each night with dinner. Fine as long as he isn’t drinking the whole bottle of Bacardi! 2-3 glasses of wine once or twice a week is also fine (a bottle is 3 large glasses). I often have a glass of wine while making dinner on Friday/Saturday and then 2 more glasses with dinner. This is over the course of 3 hours or so. I don’t usually drink during the week.

I think that sounds fine and I wouldn’t consider that problematic from what you’ve described. I think it only becomes an issue if you move from drinking socially to drinking to cope with life, and doing every day to excess.