Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be completely terrified of death?

7 replies

Barnabyblue · 24/06/2019 23:48

I should probably go to sleep but instead I'm up thinking about this. I've always struggled with the concept of death, especially as I don't believe that there is anything afterwards but I find to hard accept that one day someone is here and the next they're gone. I lost someone very close to be recently so I feel bad that this is what's going through my mind but that has brought up a lot of worries I usually try not to think about and I'm completely scared by the thought that I could die at any moment and one day I'll just be gone. I believe that when the body shuts down that's it but that's the scariest thing about it, knowing it'll be over one day, or not knowing because I'll no longer be aware of anything. Even the thought of dying much later in life scares me because the years seem to be going by so quickly, I've been worrying so much about wasting my life recently (and probably wasting a lot of my time by doing that)

OP posts:
Zapata29 · 24/06/2019 23:50

You're not alone, I find it terrifying.

Singlenotsingle · 24/06/2019 23:53

I'm sure there comes a time when death is welcome. When you're old and have done it all. It's just falling asleep really. Nothing to worry about.

Soulsista14 · 24/06/2019 23:53

I feel the same OP. I had a panic attack in the middle of the night last night thinking that I was going to die. It’s terrifying and I’ve no idea how to stop feeling like this. I’m so scared of a painful death and leaving behind my DH and DC.

CaptainCabinets · 25/06/2019 00:11

I remember being about 5 or 6 and having the sudden horrible realisation that my parents wouldn’t be around forever. I’m not afraid of my own death but the thought of losing either of them has always scared me most of all.

SweetMelodies · 25/06/2019 00:15

If you believe there is nothing then it will be the same as before you were born... so in a way we have already spent far more time ‘dead’ than alive. And we were perfectly ok!

If that makes any sense Confused 😂

Skittlesandbeer · 25/06/2019 00:34

Not sure it’s helpful, but what cured me of death anxiety was losing a lot of people in my circle in quick succession, a few years ago. 3 close family, 2 friends and 2 acquaintances/neighbours. Across 18 months. Some I cared for actively as they were dying, some I only attended funerals.

The shock began to wear off after the 3rd one. I went a bit numb, and started to recognise the signs of grief before they hit me. Managed quite well. Since then, I’m just grateful when a week passes and no one dies or gets a horrible diagnosis. Especially family. Sounds depressing perhaps, but I’ve found it quite freeing.

I think that people who involve themselves in ‘death’ through work, research, personal experience and spirituality tend not to be very anxious about it. Make peace with it, and although it follows you, it doesn’t punctuate your day in a stressful way. If it starts to interfere with daily life, then go and talk to someone. There’ll be a strategy out there that helps you.

Perhaps also have a think about the downside of immortality, if it was offered to you. I spend a lot of time with really elderly people (like, mid/late 90’s) and they seem to largely have a healthy view of death. I suspect that as your life becomes more limited (mobility, mental acuity, sight & hearing) the decline towards ‘no longer existing’ feels more natural and less scary. It’s as natural as birth, after all.

I hope you find a way to make friends with it.

xELENx · 25/06/2019 00:40

I'm the same. I've had counselling for it. I'm scared of terminal illnesses and death, not just for me but also my family, it's horrific. Bottling up your thoughts and fears will only make you feel worse as they'll become overwhelming. I was living in a state of constant anxiety and having regular panic attacks. You need to get help. See your GP or self refer to counselling as talking about your fears really does help. I won't lie and say it makes them disappear but it does make you feel slightly better and helps you to rationalise your thoughts. Sorry for your recent loss, my granny died last month (she was my best friend) so I know what you're going through. Don't suffer in silence x

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread