What would you do in this situation.

[AnneShirley666]

What would you do in this situation. My dd has been best friends with another girl (Mary) for years.

Mary does not have a good relationship with her parents. They are quite frankly awful and extremely controlling.

Mary trusts me and escapes to my home whenever she can. A few days ago she came here with a red cheek. She told me her Father had hit her. I was horrified obviously and offered to bring her to the police. However she did not want this. We live in a country where she would immediatly be put in a children's home. She loves her cat, friends and school.

I explained how a home might be better but she was adament. She is sixteen. So should I go to the police or respect her wishes. (If she were younger than probably 15 I would go straight to the police).

What would you do? TIA.

(Apoligies for posting in AIBU but I wanted to get as many options as possible).

I think you have to respect her wishes. She’s 16. She has an escape with you and you going against what she’s said will just be another controlling person in her life.

Thanks. I originally decided not to go and just be there whenever she needed me. But I have been having doubts so i'm not sure.

Do not get involved, unless she expresses asks, even then I’d be very careful. Children’s ability to love and forgive even horrible parent should not be under estimated. You could find yourself the enemy.

Are you sure about the “immediately put in a children’s home” thing. Seems rather knee-jerk. In the UK, I’d advise reporting to the school in these circumstances.

That's awful. Poor girl. It's a rock and a hard place situation. Dont want her to grow up and look back and think other adults knew and did nothing but equally dont want to make a bad situation worse for her. Plus if her controlling father finds out you reported him he might stop letting her come to you. Really dont know what I would do. Would find it hard to do nothing but equally not sure if reporting it would help her. Is there other abuse u know of? Was this a one of? Makesure she knows you are there for her and advice her to let u report it. I wouldnt break her trust in u by reporting it behind her back but ensure she knows u care. U dont think it's ok. And u want to help her. Good luck.

I'd enquire as to the viability of me looking after her full-time. I definitely would.

Can she stay with you?