help...

[LaDiDa33]

Hi all any advice welcome. AIBU in thinking that I'm about to lose my twin boys.
I'd say I'm a good mother who has raised two healthy happy boys. Recently I've been going though a great deal of emotional stress due to a recent separation and potentially impending divorce. I do everything without any help bar a cleaner once a week.
So two days ago I was exhausted, so I napped with my two sons, same room same time. Next I'm awoken to the police and fire engine in my bedroom saying one of my sons has called the fire brigade saying there's a fire. We were told social services would be contacted and that crushed me. Next day I drop my sons off at nursery, develop aura from a migraine 30 mins before pickup and took my meds. I accidentally fell asleep and didn't pick my sons up for 2 hours. My partner eventually showed up but the school has had to alert the council. I'm.freaking out that two small instances will brand me a bad mom and I'm petrified of the suggestion of my children being taken away. Any similar experiences or advice would be so greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!

SS don't just take children away that easy.

I know two mums who have had social services involved, one was the result of a very serious incident. Both have their kids. SS are there to help, you might need to go on a parenting class but they don’t just take kids away like that.

I have no knowledge about ss, but I imagine things have to be much worse than that before they remove children from their parents.

If I was you, I'd cooperate with them, be honest and show you are willing to improve your current situation.

SS will not take your kids away without trying every possible intervention. They might well decide to assess you, they might suggest extra support even but they are very very unlikely to remove your children.

p.s. you're not a bad mum you just made a mistake like all of us do sometimes.

SS is really scary, I know. But they are called when it looks like you need help and they try to work with you so that you don’t have your children taken away.

Agree with previous posters - but as an aside isn't it a bit inappropriate to have a voting button on this sort of post?

Agree Sargass0 totally inappropriate

YANBU to feel scared but SS won't just take your children away. They will work with you to support you through this difficult time.

Not picking your sons up for 2 hours doesn't make you look great tbh, 2 hours is a long time.

SS are of course scary but if your a decent parent they will see that and they don’t just take peoples dc away without a good reason.

Are you a deep sleeper OP? I can understand that you're exhausted, but I'd be looking at putting a few things in place. If you nap, set an alarm, and make sure the room is secure so young children are safe (eg stair gate) should they wake. Make sure phone (and anything else a child shouldn't have access to) is put out of reach.

It sounds to me you just need a bit of support, you're going through a tough time. I don't think for one second SS would want to remove your kids over what you have said here.

I very much doubt it
You sound exhausted though, but in the kindest possible way, you can’t just take naps if you have 2 nursery age children in the house with no other adult. Can you get any other support at home, or can your partner help at night so you are any less tired?

Sometimes i nap in the day while my dc are at school. I set two alarms and if I think that won't be enough, i ask my Dh to phone me ten minutes before i have to leave.

Oh I just put in a wrong vote.

No one wants to take your children away.

As the parent of an adopted child, believe me when I say, SS bend over backwards to keep children with their parents.
Removing children is an absolute last resort. What they may be able to do is offer a respite weekend so you can get tome much needed self care.

This is another thread where the voting buttons are confusing.